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Duration:11:24
Uploaded:2011-01-24
Last sync:2018-11-12 23:50
In which Hank contemplates stinky French armor and then burninates a Borgia tower.

Last time on "Hank Green Plays Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood 2.0" I cut you off very quickly, because it, I totally... uh... because I totally made that video too long. I think it may have been at like exactly fifteen minutes. Maybe a little less than that. But I needed to end it very quickly. It was very important.

(0:19) Um, so I killed a bunch of French soldiers, and now I have to kill more French soldiers, but I did a really good job, thanks to the help of my assassins, at killing them without a fight, quote on quote, though as many of them did fight, I still got the credit for the kills. 

(0:32) And I'm going the wrong way. And there's a horse over here. I'm gonna use the horse. Come here, horse. And, uh, yeah.

So the idea is that we put on French armor, the armor of the French, even though it may be a little stinky, and that was a bad joke, and, uh, though wearing anybody's armor in general... I just can't imagine that, that armor wouldn't be one of the most foulest things of all time. Like, wow. 'Cause, like, imagine the amount of sweat that goes on inside of that thing, and there's no way to clean it, and there's no disinfectants, and there's no bleach, there might be bleach. Did they have bleach in Assassin's Creed times? I don't know. These are the questions I do not know the answer to. Are you guys fighters? No, you're not fighters. 

(1:26) Aaah, don't run into me! Jeez! Can I just climb this? Um, so we're gonna grab their armor and then we're gonna sneak into their camp, using their armor. Okay, hello. Hello Frenchie. 

(1:45) Alright. I'm just gonna sneak my way in here, first. And you guys aren't even gonna know what hit you. There's several of you. Crossbow time!

(2:12) Nope. You guys coming, coming to get me? I'm so scared. So scared of you. Bink! Oh, you shot me first! Noooo! That guy's big! Oh, now you die. It is possible that this makes this game less fun. *laughs* How many do I have left? Two? There's more than two guys in this camp; I'm totally gonna, totally gonna win this one. This is, this one is going quite well, I have to say. Uh, the crossbow makes things easier, but apparently, also less fun. Because, really...

(3:09) Hi! Are you even facing me? Do you know I'm here? No, I shot you in the back. That is kinda embarrassing. Lemme open this... Aw, I forgot to hold down the button! What's in here, what is it, what is it, what is it? Vlad the Impaler coins! My second favorite kind of coin in Assassin's Creed. I don't know if there's more than one. 

(3:41) I see that there... You are also getting shot in the back, and I win! That was easy! I'm gonna search some people, so I can replenish my crossbow bolts, which I have used up almost all of in this mission, because crossbow. It's awesome. 

(4:05) So yeah, that last mission I just completely forgot to, like, think about the fact that there's a time limit on these things. And... yeah. So... it was long, sorry if you don't like long videos, but, um...

(4:24) I have to now get out of here. So clearly, double assas-oh why single assassination?! Oh, that guy's big. You've got a big... Ugh. I thought I was... Oh jeez. Oh jeez. I'm gonna punch you to death. I'm not. I did! I totally punched that guy to death! 

(4:53) I'm gonna kill you guys with this... and I want you to... Aww, I thought I was gonna knock him off that cliff, that would've been awesome. And then you, I'm just gonna shoot. Because this is boring. *laughs* The gun makes it less fun. I mean, maybe people complained about the amount of, like, running around and like stabbing time there was in this game, and they were like "There should be a faster way to kill enemies," but I liked, I like that. 

(5:28) Oh! Are you... I didn't kill you cause I used my fists! I'm still gonna search your body though. 

Wow. Writhing around on the ground in pain. That's what I do to people, it's part of my M.O. My modus operandi. Is that Italian? I don't think it is. I think it's Latin. 

And the horse was inside of me. That sounded bad. Whoop! Oh, there's a Borgia tower here. Can you jump off this cliff, horsie? No. 

(6:09) I could try and take care of this Borgia tower right now.

Nope, nope, nope, not that guy, I want the guy who can see me. 

(6:35) Oh no wrong guy!!! *laughs* I killed the wrong guy. Kill the frickin' Borgia captain! I always forget that you have to... No, no, no! Don't run away! Oh, I just took two potions. 

(7:06) Kick him, dude, kick him! No, not that one, that one! Oh, my god. Okay, okay, he's in a corner now, he has no chance... of escaping. 

My nose is running, cause I can't, I don't have time to wipe my face. Oh no! This is going to take forever!

(7:50) Ugh. This guy... Borgia captains are such a pain in the ass. Why are you so hard to kill? 

Kick him while he's down! There we go! Man, you were a badass. I can't believe I assassinated the wrong frickin' guy. That was just embarrassing. Alright, I have to figure out where the tower is now. 

(8:18) Don't worry about me. What, why would you even care? That's right. I killed your captain! Oh, I should've called assassins on him. Oh, so many people to kill. So many people to kill. 

*singing* doo doo doo, climbing a tower, climbing a climbing a climbing a towerrrrrr.

(8:46) *speaking* Go. Up. Up. Up Ezio. What did you think I meant when I pushed the "Up" button? Climb, climb, oh god. Oh, are you serious?! Well, where am I supposed to go, then? There, apparently. And then there. And then there. AAAAGH. God damn it. Stupid Borgia tower! Who said...

(9:18) "I will take this poster, and I will put it on my wall. 'Cause I look good in it." Ugh, I can't believe I just jumped off a building, right off of it. You can't go high... Man! I don't understand why it's so much harder in this game to climb than it was in the last game. I do not play this game for climb-y fun. Ugh. Ugh, god. I have to do this all over again. This is annoying.

(9:58) Can I not climb, I can. Okay. I don't have to get on the posts. Get up, up, up, up, up! Burn-inate the tower! Burn-inate all the people. Burn-inate the peasants, and their thatched-roof cottages. Okay. And... *imitating a hawk call* (?~10:21)Pyeooww! Pyeooww! Pyeeww! *normally* The noise of a hawk. Hawk call. People always think that that's the noise eagles make, but eagles make noises that are more like *imitating an eagle* (?~10:37)Geh geh geh, geh geh geh geh geh geh geh, geh geh geh! Like, have you heard an eagle noise? You'd be like, "What the... What?! Are you serious?!"

(10:47) That's a... that's... what? Why... I need to kill that guy. Oh no. I... Oh yeah, that's the guy I should kill. Good. Notoriety minus seventy-five percent-o.

(10:59) So I need to end this Hank, episode of "Hank Green Plays Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood 2.0" right here, because time is, time is running out and I have done all the interesting things I want to do today, so...

Thank you for watching me, I hope you enjoyed yourself, playing Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood 2.0. You will not see me and I will not see you, but you will hear me next time on "Hank Green Plays Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood 2.0." Goodbye.