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In which Hank shoots a bunch of suits of armor and explores Hogwarts a bit.
Last time on "Hank Plays LEGO Harry Potter Years 1-4" I accidentally said that it was Assassin's Creed and everybody laughed at me, ha ha ha ha ha, obviously I'm confused. And we were going someplace and I..f..come..da..and I'm Ron, and I'm Hermione, and I'm Harry, and I'm a rat. I've made...okay.

I did everything. Alright. Why push Z? Why should I push Z? Should I go here and press Z? I'm doing a thing. I don't know what that was. I waved my wand around. Oh, is she gonna break it? It doesn't even look like it's doesn't even look like it's glass. I guess there's not much glass in LEGO world?

Do it! Do it fat lady! Do it! (sings). Nope, you're not gonna do it. What are these things? I thought you were gonna break it. She's not gonna break it.

Ghosts will guide me around Hogwarts. Follow the trail of ghost studs. What's in there? What's going on? I never really know what's going on. So, I'm Hermione, and I can switch between the characters. And it's great. Uh, and I'm gonna follow these ghost studs now. 'Cause that's what it told me to do.

But I'm gonna...ahhh! There's a snake. I feel like I should be able to do more stuff, but I can't. Oh I don't speak Parseltongue so I can't go there. The staircase! They tend to change. 

Ron can send Scabbers into pipes to solve pubbles. Pubbles? Z to release Scabbers. Hello Scabs. Scabby scabby. Here he goes. Oh, look, it's three-headed dog! Fluffy, or Cerberus, depending on your mythology.

Um, alright. Z. Oh you change the thing! Yay! I like the things. I can do things! I have skills. There's a...oops I just made Scabbers come out. I want you to..yes! Yes, shoot the golden suit of armor. He's made of gold, and he broke. Oh, now he's making more, and he's spinning around. Oh my gosh! So much, so much LEGO love comes out of that man. He's just full of LEGO love.

I love it. Hello. Hello, I shoot you in the balls! I shoot you in your little LEGO balls. They're called bolts, Hank. No! They're called LEGO balls. LEGO balls. Oh are you gonna do spinny spinny? Oh, there's spinny.

How, how much does it take to kill you? You are quite a suit of armor. You can handle a lot of whatever that spell is that I'm casting.

Follow ghost man! Who is this? I don't even know what ghost I'm following. Is it Nearly Headless Nick? I couldn't tell. And in the face, in the face! Doodoodoodoodoo.

Do you ever get the feeling that you're not, uh, doing that much stuff, actually? Just shooting that guy. Oh, I'm sorry! Ohh you were in the way. Great thing about this game is that, uh, unlike Assassin's Creed, if you accidentally shoot someone they don't die.

Yes. Yes, excellent. Ooh, blue bolts! Blue LEGO ball. LEGO ball of bolty bolt. Oh, what am I shooting to get that 2 of 6? What was that? What does that mean, why do people always say that? "Mmm."

What are you doin'? That's a fun dance, can I do it? Oh no, you're done. Okay, that's fine. Go to lessons to learn more spells. Okay. This game is a game where you have a lot of time to think.

Yes, blue. Hello blue-bee. Ah, come on! Ooh, i almost fell. Yes. That's what I want. Blue bolts! I shouldn't jump so much. Ohh now you're dead. Oh, stuff came out of there, oh and out of there. Come's out of everywhere. Oh it's..they're floating candle things. 4 of 6, 4 of 6! So close.

Anybody else? Anybody see any more of them? I thought I saw one up here. Out of my way. Oh there's one. There's one. 5 of 6! Oh, I fell. Where is 6 of 6? 6 of 6? Hello? 6 of 6. Hello, hello, where are you?

Oh come on, where is it? Where is it? Where are you, dumb. He does kind of a little thrust to get the coins out. EH! Oh, no? I call them everything, I call them coins, I call them bolts, I call them balls. They, they are, they are so unimportant to the actual completion of...ooh! Doin' a handstand...of the game. Yet for some reason, for some reason I still want to do everything I can to get them.

I don't see it. This is frustrating. Frustrating! Frustrated! I got 5 of 6 and not 6 of 6! So not fair! What is this thing? Okay, I don't know. Oh, do a thing! (imitating game sounds) huh! heh! huh!

I jump a lot. I'm a jumper. What can i say? Okay, lets just go, let's just, let's move the game along. Moving through the processes. Where are you going ghosty friend? What is this guy? What is this? Follow the teacher through the door to start the lesson. What is this thing? I don't know why I switched people. I want to be Harry.

What is that? What is that? What is that? What are you trying to get? What's goin' on?

Okay lets actually learn how to play the game. Takin' a lesson. Lesson time. Who is that? That person doesn't look familiar to me. Oh, no. Never mind. 

Hey, what are we d..are we gonna learn Wingardium Leviosa? LevioSA, wiggly. Ha. Perfect. That's exactly what I wanted to be able to do. Do it to Malfoy! Oh you hung your friends by things.

Hold Z to cast Wingardium Leviosa. What is Z? That one. I did it. What? Oh, yes. (Singing)  dun dun dun dunnnn! I don't know what I did!

Did I save a boy? Yeah, I'm so good at magic. I am better at magic than I ever knew. It doesn't take me long at all to learn these tricks. Hello? Who do I Leviosa now? Hello? Anyone? Anyone for Levi..LevioSA..LeviOsa...LevioSA.

Yeah! Spin it! Make the bolts come off, yes. This is..crossbow bolts in Assassin's Creed. Uh, different bolts in LEGO Harry Potter. Should I call it LEGO Harry Potter? What should I call it? Should I call it LEGO Harry Potter 2.0, no that's a bad idea. LEGO...Hanky Potter? (laughs.) LEGO Hanky Potter is funny.

What am I doin'? What am I doin'? Put you there, and put's like Tetris, I'm playin' Tetris. Nope. Put..nope. I bet you Nope, that's not gonna work. I don't know what I'm doing. Is that gonna work?

It worked! Ooh those guys can jump fast. Oooh saving the students! Doing a thing. Is there more? Why didn't...hold B to cast on the painting. What is B again? B? B. B. That one is B. What's going on? I don't know. What's going on? What are you doing? Why..when I push the button..not..

I'm confused. There's all these students who are trapped. This one is trapped and that one is trapped. I'm untrapping them! But mostly I'm just collecting more coins for my massive collection. Massive! Truly massive collection of LEGO bolts. 'Cause you can never really be a happy person without a massive collection of LEGO bolts. What is this? What is this game teaching our children?

Oh, I can move stuff! I can move stuff once I pick it up, I don't know what I'm doing with this. Oh am I building a person? I am, I'm building a person. I shall make him a man! With blond hair and a tan. Make him my favorite obsession. I'm making a knight!

I made a knight, now I can destroy him. No? No. Yes I see..I..that was complicated. So, uh, I think that what we have learned is that accumulation of wealth is the only way to demonstrate your worthiness as a person. And on that note, I'm going to end this episode of "Hank Green Plays LEGO Harry Potter Years 1-4."

Uh, and say that you will not see me and I will not see you but you will hear me, next time on "Hank Green Plays LEGO Harry Potter Years 1-4." Goodbye.