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Round 2 of Sibling Rivalry where Hank and John play Super Smash Bros.

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Game I Played:

Hank: Hello--

John: Hello and welcome to Games with Hank.  He's Hank, I'm Other Hank.  

Hank: --and we're gonna play Super Smash Bros.

John: Smash smash!

Hank: We're brothers.

John: Yep.

Hank: And this is Smash Bros.  So this is Smash Bros Brothers, here on Games with Hank.

John: I don't know how to play this game, so I have a huge disadvantage.  

Hank: I'm gonna beat him and it's gonna be fun.

John: Let's smash.

Hank: Let's smash.

 Game 1

John: Alright, so does it matter who I pick?

Hank: I mean, it sort of does.  Some of the characters are stronger than other characters.

John: Who's strong?  You've gotta pick someone who's really weak, 'cause I'm playing Yoshi.

Hank: Yoshi's good.  

John: Yoshi!

Hank: I'm gonna be Wii Fit Trainer.  Wii Fit.  Oh, you checked out your own butt.  I'm not sure what I'm doing right now.  Oh, he shoots a little thing.  Oh, you've got a lightsaber, John.  I'm in trouble.  I'm in trouble, you are winning.

John: How do I jump?

Hank: Oh, another lightsaber, lightsaber duel!  Uh, you jump by pushing up or by pushing the grey buttons.  Oh man, you knocked my lightsaber out of my hand.  Oh, I missed you.  Yeah, good, hey, a soccer ball.  I hit it really hard and it went away.  Another--ooh, ooh, ooh.  He's great.  Alright, this is a lot easier to follow than the eight player Smash Bros we played here on Games with Hank.  Where'd I go?!

John: I think I'm losing.

Hank: Uh, you're actually winning.  You're doing quite well. Apparently--

John: Actually

Hank: Apparently I need to hit the - You just killed me!

John: Oh, super smash!

Hank: You just killed me man. This thing, this floating ball here...

John: Should I try to get it?

Hank: Yeah, you should try to get it.

John: I just got it.

Hank: You have to hit it a bunch of different times. Now you hit B and you'll do an awesome attack, and you'll be flying around. You can keep flying around and hitting me - you're just a giant dragon Yoshi with Pegasus wings and it's amazing.

John: Eat my fire!

Hank: Basically. Uh-

John: What happened??

Hank: You fell down. You fell down the hole.

John: Not realistic!

Hank: Why isn't it realistic-

John: I never fall down the hole.

Hank: You don't ever fall down holes?

John: No!

Hank: Okay. I don't know what I'm doing with this Wii Fit Trainer guy - ooh, nice hit!

John: Suck it... Jeff! That's not good for me. That's not good for me either.

Hank: Oh, if you push up and B, you can sorta do like, save throws. Oh, you hit me hard. Oh man. Oh man!

John: How aren't you dead yet?

Hank: I just died, you just killed me.

John: Well then why isn't this game over?

Hank: Oh oh, it's the number of times each person dies. You figured out how to block, look at you. I don't like this, curve place.... What did I just throw? This tiny thingy? Oh. Guess what John-

John: Time just got so slow.

Hank: Time just got slow. It got slow for me too though, I don't generally understand - up and B, up and B!

John: Up and B, up and B...

Hank: Oh!

John: Who's winning?

Hank: I don't know who's gonna win this. One of us. Or it's going to be a tie. It could also be a tie, John.

John: I think you died more times than I did.

Hank: I feel like I got a lot - 

John: I also showed a lot of spirit (?)

Hank: But I won.

John: Nooooo

Hank: Well you-

John: Injustice!

 Game 2

Hank: You did extremely well.

John: Is the Wii Fit trainer bad?

Hank: I think, no, I think the Wii Fit trainer is fine.

John: You need to play with someone who's worse then, cause I wanna win.

Hank: Oh, well that - Okay let's try Pac-Man.

John: Pac-Man? I don't know, that's scary. Up and B, I don't know how to do that. 

Hank: Up and B. What am I doing? I don't know what I just did. 

John: What's your... What's your... What's your game man?

Hank: I don't know. I just tried to pick you up and throw you but you broke out of it. Oh careful.

John: Up and B, up and B!

Hank: Or is it up and A?

John: I don't know. But I lost. And...

Hank: It's up and B. It's up and B, I was right. Ooo. Yea, like that.

John: You did and up and B there.

Hank: Oh, you just threw a poke-ball, that was good... a good idea. Im falling, I'm falling! I'm not falling. Wow, there was... that Snorlax just came down right in the middle of all of that.

John: (softly) What's a Snorlax?

Hank: It's a Pokemon, of course. You know, duh.

John: (softly) (?)

Hank: Yea, I know. We're too old for that. But, I tell people that all the time. You died and I don't know why, but you did. You gotta avoid the edges.

John: Will you just acknowledge that there's injustice involved in this game.

Hank: I will acknowledge that there's injustice involved in the world. Just had some kind of magical power. Oooh a star thingy. I didn't (muffles) (?). Alright, just punch that Yoshi. Punch a Yoshi, punch a Yoshi, punch a Yoshi, punch.

John: You're at 80 percent, I'm at 7 percent. I don't like this game. It's stupid, and i don't like it.

Hank: Uh-oh. Now Pacman's got the thing! IM GIANT PACMAN and i ate you.

John: Up and B. 

Hank: I ate you again.

John: Up and B. Up and B. Up and B.

Hank: This is weird.

John: I'm throwin' soccer balls.

Hank: I'm just holding... some kind of explosion

John: Up and B. Up and B.

Hank: I killed us both!

John: Or, did I kill us both.

Hank: I think I killed us both.

John: Pacman has 0 percent right now.

Hank: Man... that's, that's an attack I can do. 


John: Up and B. Up and B. Up and B. Up and B. Up and B.

Hank: I think you might have to hit the buttons at the same time, but I'm not sure.  Ooh, there's a bouncy thing.  Ooh, fire sword!

John: You don't get to play anymore!  I have a fire sword now!  I am your God!  Come for me!  You and your Up and B.  It's a huge advantage to have Up and B in your arsenal. 

Hank: It is a bit of an advantage, but you are doing well with your fire sword.  What's in my hand?  Oh, it's a Pokeball.  I hit you in the face with it.  I don't know what that thing is.  Ohh, that was bad. 

John: Up and B.  Up and B, Up and B, Up and B, Up and B, Up and B, I mean, all I can do is throw a soccer ball. 

Hank: I don't know what that's about, John. 

John: Ohh, I think it's Yoshi.  Yoshi might be the problem.  Yes, I think we all know who won there.  Ay-yay. 

Hank: Ay-yay-yay.

John: Pac-man's very good, that's one thing.  

Hank: Okay, well, I'll try to not be Pac-man.

Alright, so I'm Jeff.  Oh, I can charge up my arrow shot.  Why are you wearing red, Luigi, that's very confusing.  Oh! 

John: Oh, that wasn't cool.

Hank: You can double jump by the way.  Wow, I just pulled a really big something out of my stuff.  Whoa, what just happened?  That was neat, I liked it, I didn't understand it, but I liked it.  Ooh.

John: Up and B.  Nope.  Nope.  Hank won.

Hank: You also have to jump.  So you have two jumps, and then you can Up and B, and then you can get a pretty big distance that way.   Whoaa, you wanna fall on one of those barrels, apparently, because it shot me over.

John: Oh, now I'm dead again.

Hank: Go into the barrel.  You missed the barrel.  You wanna go into the barrel.  The little barrel there?

John: Yup.

Hank: You wanna go in that. 

John: 'Kay. 

Hank: Alright.  Or not. 

John: I'm quite content here, actually. 

Hank: What have we done? 

John: I mean, I'm at 0%, I think this is my best decision available to me. 

Hank: Okay, I'm gonna try and come back over so we can continue fighting.  Okay, good job. 

John: (?~8:27) had to be such a jerk. 

Hank: Ooh, good, well done.  Oops, oops, oops, oops. 

John: Suck it, Jeff. 

Hank: What am I made of?  What is this thing?  What is that?  Is it, like, a reflecty thing?  I don't know. 

John: That's gonna hurt me. 

Hank: Whoof.  Whoof.  Well done.  Whoof, well done again, oh my goodness.

John: You're at 100%.  Or is that--wait, is that how injured you are?

Hank: That's how injured I am.

John: Oh.  You're very injured. 

Hank: I'm very injured.  100% is quite a lot.

John: You should be concerned.  Oh.

Hank: Oh, you just got shot.  You just got shot over here.  We're over here, John.  We're tiny.  We're tiny and far away.  You're smoke bombed.

John: You're at 113%, I don't understand how you're alive.

Hank: I know.  Well, I don't know, but I'm going over here to this thing, 'cause it looks like fun. 

John: I, instead, am gonna die.  Someone explain to me how someone can be 113%

Hank: Give me that, give me that stuff, whoaaa, I just got Bullet Bill'd.

John: Up and B! 

Hank: Oh.  Uh-oh.  Now I'm stuck.  I'm stuck over here, John.  Boing, hello, welcome to me, I've got a bunny hat on!  I'm very fast now!  Better watch out, I got a bunny hat. 

John: This game is completely unfair, you've been at 114% forever.  I was just at 94% and then I died.  I distrust--I mean, it's like, I don't trust in the values of the game.

Hank: There you go, you killed me, see, I died. 

John: Once you got to 190%.

Hank: You had to hit me harder, you weren't hitting me hard enough. 

John: Ohh, I barely avoided another fall. 

Hank: It's fun though, right?

John: The first game was great.  Not really.

Hank: There's a Pikmin on you, hahaha.

John: I don't know what that means.

Hank: It was just--oh, you killed it.  You killed my Pikmin.  Unacceptable! 

John: Now I'm gonna kill all your Pikmin, whatever they are.  They're done for. 

Hank: You're up there. 

John: Yeah, suck it. 

Hank: Uh, we both died, I don't know how or why.  So, that was interesting.  I like this--this--uh--I don't know how to do anything right now with these little guys.  But you're in an egg and something--somebody wants me to go over here apparently?  Be careful with this thing, it's gonna try and suck you up into space, or not, it might (?~11:16)

John: I don't wanna go to space, I don't wanna go to space! 

Hank: I said be careful, John.  I told you to be careful.  But you were lucky, you survived.  Hello?  Apparently, we can fight up here.  If you wanna. 

John: I'm on fire.

Hank: You're on fire?  Like a fireball on fire?  We broke it.  I wanna grab--I wanna--owwww.

John: Suck it! 

Hank: Olimar.  Or Jeff.  Either way.  Uh-oh, you have a gun.  I have a gun. 

John: How do I get up there?

Hank: Just jump.  You gotta push, yeah, there you go.  Like that.  Thanks for coming.  It's nice to see you.  If you wanna come back up here, that'd be great.

John: Yeah, I have some regrets about coming. 

Hank: Ohh, what's this thing?  I don't know.  Uh--ooh--uhhh--Pikmin.  Pik--pik--pik--pik--pikimen!  You died!

John: I had 119%, I knew that wasn't good.  Only Hank can live at 119%, everybody knows that. 

Hank: Ow.  Oh.

John: Come on down, Jeff.

Hank: Captain Olimar!  Ow.  Ahh, don't kill my Pikmin.  Ow.  Ooh.  Well.  What is that thing?  What is it?  I keep picking it up and nothing happens. 

John: Well, that happened. 

Hank: Oh, I just punched you, that was a normal punch. 

John: 101.  That means you're halfway dead.  Ohhhh, you're still not dead, amazingly.  Jeff.  He's got the power of survival.  That's his magic power. 

Hank: Ooh, I just bounced off the ropes.  Uh-oh, uh-oh, Yoshi's got the thing.  Push B.  The red one.  That's not it.  The red button.

John: I am pushing the red button. 

Hank: Oh, you are, I don't know what's going on.  Maybe that's your special power?  I don't think it's your special power. 

John: Yeah, turning to a soccer ball.  It's great.  It's amazing.

Hank: It's an egg. 

John: You're 146%, I'd just like to point out. 

Hank: Just keep hitting B, just keep hitting B. 

John: God, that s--153%, that's ridiculous!  No one can be 153% dead.  Yoshi, stop cheering for him.  Alright, thanks for watching Hankgames.

Hank: Tha--yes.  This is Games with Hank. 

John: Hank,, subscribe. 

Hank: If you don't know what he's talking about, he took over my other gaming channel and now he's trying to push people over there from here.

John: It's great. 

Hank: And it's completely unacceptable!

John: AFC Wimbledon.

Hank: I'm gonna turn this--thank you for watching and DFTBA.