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Duration:12:50
Uploaded:2015-03-28
Last sync:2018-04-25 02:00
In the latest episode of Sims 3 - Bill & Jimmy's Alternate Universe we find love, . . .in all the right places.

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Hank: Hello and welcome to Hank Green Plays the Sims! Today we're going back into the world of the ex-presidents DLC, where Jill -- Jill Carter and Bimmy Clinton (beep) Bill Carter and Jimmy Clinton -- nope (beep) Jill Carter and Bimmy Clinton -- still nope (beep) Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter are enjoying their lives together, though significantly less successful in their lives than they were the first time I tried this. We're going back and we're gonna make these guys successful human beings! (0:30)

 Gameplay (0:30)


Here we are. Uh, Bill is hanging out in the corner, and Jimmy is sleeping in his bed and everything is fine and, uh, we're going-- we're gonna to try to make these guys live the lives they always wanted to live, even though they had to be stuck with their, with their presidential ambitions. Bill Clinton is going home, apparently, which is weird because he's literally standing in his home, and, uh, and Jimmy Carter, whose lifetime wish is to become a creature-robot cross-breeder-- (1:00)
"The complexity of circuitry and oddity of organics perennially perplex--" What? What? What the? Oh, god. As a person who thinks a lot about science, that sentence infuriates me. "Perennially perplex the scientific community, your Sim must learn the vast handiness, expertise needed to control any gadget, and enough experience with gardening and fishing --" What? What? -- "to know what organic things need to thrive when fused with machines?!? (1:331)
Well. I guess... Jimmy Carter is gonna hafta go fishing a lot, and garden. So we should probably have a garden, I don't know how to do that but I should also press the play button. And spend less time, I think -- go to be-- go to bed! It's 2:30 p.m.! Why are you guys always so tired? Whose cellphone is ringing right now? "If Jimmy doesn't fix his work performance, he will soon face disciplinary action." I agree! He didn't go to work at all today! They are both sleeping and it's 3:00 in the afternoon! I don't know what you problem is? Do you guys need better beds? Should I buy you better beds? Are you not getting enough good sleep because your beds aren't expensive enough? I bet that's totally what it is! You guys are a bunch of wa-- (beep) is that OK to say on Games With Hank? (2:15)
I'm just really disappointed in how, like, you're like, "I can't sleep well! Buy me a really expensive bed!" "The Legendary Bedxcalibur, by Dul"-- well that sounds like something that Bill Clinton would really enjoy. "The Lullaby Bed". Jimmy's gonna get a Lullaby Bed. Alright. You guys, I hope you sleep better now, because the amount of time you're spending sleeping is really unacceptable. (2:45)
Alright, so, I'm currently, I've got Jimmy Carter selected, and he's comfy, and entertained, by his sleeping, but clearly he needs to do something else, so what should he do? What should he do? Let's go to the beach. Let's-- he's gonna go to the beach. There's a chess tournament. He's gonna visit the Old Pier Beach with Bill Clinton! It's gonna happen! You guys are gonna hang out, and you're gonna enjoy it, or I'm gonna-- you're sleeping. (3:16)
Are you both in the same cab? Or are you in different cabs, because-- you're in the same cab, that's good. At least you guys fricking ride-shared, I'm happy about that. Uh, maybe you guys can go to the beach and pick up some ladies! (3:29)
Hey, whadja find, Bill Clinton? Whoa, are you OK? I'm thinking about parties, you're... not happy. J-Jimmy? What are the romantic options? Compliment appearance. Amorous hug. Flirtatious joke. Compliment personality. Compliment his personality! That's not necessarily romantic. Well, now, when you say it like that it is! Oh. OK. Wait, "looks like it'll just be Jimmy now... hopefully they have a great date"?!? What is happening? Wait. There's hearts. We've got hearts! We've got Bill and Jimmy hearts! J-- wha-- oh-- OK! Uh, let's just, let's just fast-forward through this and see what happens. (4:20)
Uh. OK. This is going a different directions than pre-- OH GOODNESS! Your Sim wants some. You guys gonna go swimming? They're going swimming-- oh my god. Well, all you have to do is click on one little romantic thing, and suddenly, you've got a boyfriend. Oh, Bill, that body. That body, Bill, it's kinda nuts. You guys are an adorable couple, how didn't I-- I didn't even know! I didn't even know how they felt about each other, I've been holding them back all this time! Maybe it's-- is it Jimmy's phone that's ringing? Answer phone. Who is it? Oh, it's Nancy. Uh oh! (5:08)
You guys should probably go home. Where are you going now? You guys make no sense! You are extremely inefficient. Alright, let's go... why are you going back in the water? You're tired! You want to go to bed! You're sleepy, "get Bill to bed soon to avoid the wrath of the truly tired." Alright, go home. You two. Both of you, go home. It's fine. You know, you live together, you can have a good time at the beach another time. Alright. That-- you take forever to do anything! What are you doing? Augh! Alright. Good job, everybody. Bad job at the chess tournament thing, but everything else is fine. Oh. You're sleeping in your crappy bed, so let's push the play button, and make sure you sleep in the correct bed. That's Jimmy Carter's bed, and this is Bill Clinton's bed, and I know that y-- you guys are not going to start sleeping in the same bed yet, that's not safe, that's-- you need to take it slow, and, and, you know, not rush into things. Ah-- "Kiss Bill." I'm going to put Kiss Bill in our list of things that Jimmy Carter wants to do with his life. Invite a Sim over, Become Friends With -- let's take one off and add this, because then I get double points! Double points! (6:31)
Alright, it's 1a.m., you really do need to sleep, and you also need to take a shower, man. Alright. OK, Bill Clinton. You're no longer tired, so let's stop sleeping and instead let's get in the shower. With Jimmy Carter, or without Jimmy Carter? Let's do it without Jimmy Carter for now. I-- you're still-- yeah, you're hungry, but take a shower first, because that's gross. You'll-- you'll do that--you'll get food right after you take a shower. (6:58)
Cause apparently I can only have quick meals, but that's okay. Uhh, now we have to-- we're going to, uh, remove the bed. Lets remove this-- how do I remove it? Sledgehammer? (Singing) I wanna be-- bow! The sledgehammer! (Talking) And also... Lets move... this, to the inside of the house, 'cause that is better, but I'm gonna leave the mirror on the outside of the house, because I just think that's hilarious. (7:30)
You guys take extremely long showers. Are you-- Are you still-- you're not grungy anymore, just go-- just go, get your food, because you need to-- 'cause your carpool is here, now! Stop! Eating! Go! Go, go! Get in the carpool, geez! Man. Oh, God, Jimmy! You are always late! Go to work! Go to work! Ah, God, faster, you doof! Move your li-- why is he parked all the way over there? I'm old, come on! (8:05)
He's a wee bit peckish, so that's not good. Did not get a chance to eat any food today, I'm so sorry. You need to sleep less! (8:13)
Okay, now we got two nice beds, hopefully we can have a lot less sleeping going on in this game. And a lot more kissing! (8:21)
(In a strange voice) Behh, "the best evaporating dish is a clean one. A large portion of the science facility's equipment is dirty, making it useless for accurate, precision experiments and data collection. Take these five scientific dishes home and clean them. After all, the best evaporating dishes are the squeaky clean ones. Your service to the lab will increase your job performance." (Still in strange voice) Okay. That sounds good. I'll do that. I have to make sure I clean dishes. I'm strained, though. I'm feeling strained. Jimmy Carter talks like this, apparently. He really wants to kiss his friend Bill Clinton, who he lives in an apartment with. Their newspapers are rotting on the front lawn, 'cause no one cares about newspapers anymore. For real. Who reads the frickin' newspaper? We got Craigslist, we don't need-- (In normal voice) Did my dog just fart? (9:03)
Okay, Bill Clinton is home from work. What's he doing? Nothing. He's strained, though, so he should probably go to... someplace. Where should he go, to be less strained? Maybe I should just let him clean up a bit. Yes, clean the housethat is excellent n-- what are you doing now? What are you-- where are you going now? Bill Clinton, where are you going? Ahh, it goes too fast. Bill-- Jimmy sees that Bill is bored. Oh, are they hanging out on the front lawn? Oh, they're just hanging out on the front lawn. Uh, so. You guys. Uh. Can we-- can I go on a date? Can you go on a date? Oh! We got-- What is happening? You got-- you guys got a-- You're having negative interactions, why is that happening? Guys, guys, wait! Don't have negative interactions! Ahh, mm-- uh, amorous hug! Amorous hug time. I just don't want you guys to-- Aww. You guys are so cute! Alright, this is going better now. Ask out on a date. Yeah, lets go on a date. Lets go on a date to the... movies? (?)(Simlish)(~10:17) Did it work? I don't know. Are you going on a date now? "Jimmy Carter worked up the nerve and asked Bill on a date." I don't... Beh-- Okay? Does it wor-- I don't know. Did we... I'm so confused. What does this mean? Okay. Uh, yeah! A movie. That sounds good. Whoa, you guys're... close together. You should go see a movie. How do y-- I said, do you want to go on a date, and now-- You're on a date now? This is the most boring date of all time, I have to say, you guys. Uh, can we go to a movie instead? "Attend movie with date." Eighty dollars? They came with tweezers! (11:08)
"Jimmy Carter just saw a movie." He will always remember that! I don't care! You guys both saw a movie, and will apparently that was both-- that was a lifetime goal of both of yours. Now where are you? Bill Clinton's in a terrible mood. He's nauseous? That's not good! That's-- "from dumpster"--? Why were you dumpster diving!? Don't-- no, stop! Stop dumpster diving! Why are you doing that!? What are you doing in the trash!? Ah-- Ah-- Stop! Stop! What's happ-why!? What on Earth are-- Oh, this is the worst date ever!! (11:48)
Stop! Going! In! The trash! What is happening!? Go to a restaurant! Eat! Eat outside! Eat! I can't do that. Eat there. Why can't I eat with date? I have enough money to eat with date! Eat! With da--! Is is closed? It's closed! It's two in the morning! Go home, you dorks! Go home, oh, God. Oh, man. "Nauseous", "smelly", "tired", "hungry"-- but "fulfilled"! Oh, jeez, this-- this has not been a good day for Jim-- Jimmy Carter and Bill Clinton, despite the fact that they are in love. They spent an awful lot of time inside of dumpsters because I was not able to, uh, get them to the movie in time for them to leave, and go to dinner-- you should go to dinner and a movie, not a movie and dinner, is what we have learned today.

 Outro (12:43)


This has been Games with Hank, I have been the Hank and the game has been Sims 3, thanks for watching... Oh, God! DFTBA.