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Edited by Tim Thomas


Hank: Hello and welcome to Games with Hank, I'm Hank, this is games with me, it's Wii Wednesday, and Wife Wednesday, how are you doing, wife? 

Katherine: Wheeeee!  Whee! 

Hank: Whee!

Katherine: Wiiiiii-u!

Hank: So today, as previously, we're playing Super Mario 3D World, I think, right?

Katherine: I think that's what it's called.

Hank: Okay.

Katherine: Something like that.

Hank: Super Mario 3D World, and we're gonna play Join Up, Mario and Luigi, I think this is-- Don't do it at the same time so it's confusing. Yes, ok.

Katherine's remote: Luigi time!

Hank: Yeah, the remote makes noises.

Katherine: Luigi!

Hank: Lou-- Lou-gi

Katherine: In my hands.

Hank: Oh, and we're in slippery-land. Uh, so what have we done?

Katherine: uh....

Hank: What should we do? We've done all of these things.

Katherine: We've done all of those things?

Hank: Yeah, we didn't get any of the stars on any of these levels, though.

Katherine: Oh, man

Hank: That's not good. We need stars to get into castles. So let's try harder on star front.

 World 3-7 Switchboard falls (0:56)

Katherine: (long sigh)

Hank: Switchboard Falls sounds like fun.

Katherine: No, it doesn't.

Hank: Is it gonna be like working at the--

Katherine: (sings) car wash.

Hank: --telephone company? Have we done this one before? I almost died.

Katherine: We have played this game a little bit before.

Hank: Yeah, but I feel like I did this recently.

Katherine: Well, we used these things before.

Hank: Yeah. All right. And, we have done this.

Katherine: This does look familiar, though.

Hank: Ah, there's a bee, there's a bee. I'm stuck. You killed me.

Katherine: Yeah.

Hank: No, I didn't die. I like that-- whoa ger b-gerk tick I forgot about that.

Katherine: You forget how to play this game.

Hank: Yeah, it doesn't take long.

Katherine: What is this?

Hank: How do you ground pound?

Katherine: What is this?

Hank: What is what?

Katherine: What is this trigger for?

Hank: You're--you're speedy--

Katherine: It's making me fast.

Hank: Yeah. (? 1:45) Oh, there's a thing there. In the middle.

Katherine: Where?

Hank: Ground pound. Yeah! Well done, I've got a flower down here for you.

Katherine: Yes, I want it.

Hank: Oh no.

Hank: Uuuuh. Aaaah! Thank you, thank you! Save my butt! (panicky stuttering)

Katherine: You also have these thing.

Hank: I know, but he was behind me. I can't shoot backward.

Katherine: Just turn around.

Hank: But he was right behind me! If I turned around I would have died! Got stung by a big bee butt!

Katherine: And I'm coming for you (? 2:18)

Hank: Oh, they go underwater, the fire. Oh gosh, oh no! (screaming) Now both of us...

Katherine: Yeah great. Good--

Hank: Bad.

Katherine: Well dones.

Hank: Oh, man, oh man, oh man, oh man. Why?

Katherine: Cuz I was killing bees.

Hank: OK, but I-- I can't get on this thing right now.

Katherine: BEES.

Hank: Now I have to go all the way back. You just go on ahead without me. Got on without me! It'll be fine.

Katherine: We're brothers.

Hank: We're brothers! Thank you game--

Katherine: There we go.

Hank: --for saving me.

Katherine: Wait.

Hank: What? Ooh.

Katherine: Why are these things showing up?

Hank: Uh-- when you ground pound, they show up. That has always been the case.

Katherine: I have never noticed that before. Swim Luigi.

Hank: Uh-oh. Uh-oh!

Katherine: Swim.

Hank: Where are you going? What are we doing?

Katherine: We've got to get on this thing and then I'm gonna use it to get over here. I-- I forget--

Hank: Just get me over it and I'll pop the bubble. It didn't, it went under. It was like, "you are trying to cheat, that is not allowed."

Katherine: Oh crud.

Hank: Yay, I did it. I diiiiid it.

Katherine: Why'm I stuck?

Hank: Wrong waaaaaaay. Uh-oh.

Katherine: Uh-oh.

Hank: You didn't. Uh-oh, it's coming after me. It's coming after me, it's inside of the switchboard, Katherine help! Help! It's coming!

Hank: Euuuuuuh oh, tens! And a pipe. I z'd it! Sorry that the bad thing happened to you.

Katherine: I've really forgotten how to play this game. For some reason.

Hank: Nice, nice, good.

Katherine: Shooooooot!

Hank: I got it! I got it! Yeah. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. We got that star, yeah we did. Get it Katherine! Get that Luigi lamp! get it! Ride, ride all up on it.

Katherine: (confused laugh) I don't know.

Hank: Uh! Oh. Yeah, one ups! Yeah, get it. All right. And I'm gonna pound it for no reason.

Katherine: (? 4:53)

Hank: Uh, there's me. (?)

Katherine: (whispers) My god.

Hank: uh... Yeah! Just one fire thing?

Katherine: (?)

Hank: Oh gosh! Shoot them! Shoot em up! Shoot em up, shoot em up, shoot em up. Where am I? I'm dead, I died, I'm a dead man.

Katherine: (laughs) God. Come to me, brother.

Hank: Brother! Uh-oh, uh-oh! I died. Did we-- I think we missed a star.

Katherine: I don't know, it's possible.

Hank: Oh, you almost died just now. YAARBAHAR! Oh well I missed the thing but then I just jumped right off it.

Katherine: UGH!

Hank: It's OK, you're fine.

Katherine: Am I fine? (?)

Hank: Sorry, my bad.

Katherine: Am I fine? Missed it.

Hank: Why-- that's not good! Where am I? Where are you? AAAAAAH.

Katherine: I just ground pounded into nothing!

Hank: Oh, it's still coming, they're still coming AHHHH. Boop ba doop doop boop.

Katherine: Can we go?

Hank: Yes.

Katherine: HAH! Thank you for catching meeeee-

Hank: Alrighty-doo-shoot. Shoot, I did not realize--

Katherine: Alrighty-doo-shoot.

Hank: Alrighty-doo-shoot. What's wrong with that?

Katherine: I don't know.

Hank: Alrighty-doo-shoot.

Katherine: Nothing.

Hank: Nothing. Nothing's wrong with it.

Katherine: Doosh shoot.

Hank: Doo-shoot. Alrighty-doo-shoot.

Katherine: Doos shoot it's a soft--

Hank: (sings) She's my little doo-shoot. You don't know what I got. Doo-shoot you don't know what I got.

Katherine: It's a very soft shoot. So soft.

Hank: We only got one star. Where were they all!?

Katherine: One whole star!

Hank: Where are they hiding?

Katherine: I don't know, I can't focus, I just panicked the whole time.

Hank: I found-- we found one. That was fun, I liked it, that was a lot of panic though.

Katherine: You did like that?

Hank: Yeah, I did.

Katherine: I've forgotten how to run fast, so...

Hank: I've forgotten-- Katherine's forgotten how to have fun!

Katherine: So, my skills, I was worried.

Hank: It's the trigger, isn't it? It's the trigger.

Katherine: See toad. Fire.

Hank: The trigger makes you run fast.

Katherine: This one?

Hank: Yeah, the trigger. The only trigger that there is. Unilateral decision! Well done!

Katherine: Yeah, good choice.

Hank: Oh, you're a kitty crown! Hi toad! Hi toad! Hi toad! Hi toad! Hi, hi, hi, hi--

Katherine: You make--

Hank: Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi. You've got confetti in your head, every single time. So much head confetti! Infinite amounts. You know if you measured the amount of confetti inside of Toad's head, it would be larger than the mass of the universe. True fact! -Hank Green.

Katherine: If you didn't want somebody to jump on your head, you shouldn't have made it full of confetti.

Hank: Other true fact.

Katherine: Victim blaming. (Hank laughs) Definition.

Hank: All right. Move on. Uh, do we have enough stars? Apparently, yes.

Katherine: It seems like it. Didn't say--

 World 3-train The Bullet Bill Express (8:25)

Hank: The Bullet Bill Express sounds dangerous.

Katherine: Didn't say anything about--

Hank: Oh, it's level-- it's world 3-train. Shoot me onto the train little girl! Fairy. Fairy girl.

Katherine: I miss side-scrolling sh--

Hank: I'm on your head.

Katherine: I didn't--

Hank: I'm on your head.

Katherine: Get on there!

Hank: Oh, well that was a really bad start.

Katherine: I'm stuck under here again.

Hank: OK, come-- yeah, you're a kitty.

Katherine: No, I'm a raccoon.

Hank: Me too.

Katherine: Careful, I don't-- I don't know what that is, but I don't like it. OK, nevermind.

Hank: You can change their direction. Oh no, oh no, oh no.

Katherine: Get the star, baby, aw yeah.

Hank: I got it! I got it, but it was all-- I don't know if it was worth it AH! Oh gosh, oh gosh.

Katherine: We got an extra leaf if you want it.

Hank: I do. Nope! Nope.

Katherine: Nope, plus minus.

Hank: AH, I died! Come back so I can get the leaf!

Katherine: Plus the minus.

Hank: Come back so I can get the leaf! Oh god, eurgh-bur That was close. How do you kill these things?

Katherine: You gotta jump on them.

Hank: Oh, the tail. The tail helps, too. Whoah! Kay. Good try.

Katherine: I don't know what I was trying to do, but I didn't do it.

Hank: Trying to run away.

Katherine: Wait a second!

Hank: What?

Katherine: There's a pipe! There's a]the pipe! Get in the pipe! Brother! get in the pipe (hyperventilating)

Hank: I did it! I got in the pipe. Here I am, I'm over here.

Katherine: You left the crown behind.

Hank: I left the crown behind.

Katherine: I'm all-- you're alone.

Hank: I'm alone?

Katherine: You're all alone.

Hank: There's a toad miner in there. What's going on toad miner? Hey! Thank you!

Katherine: Jump on his dang head.

Hank: I got all three stars, though.

Katherine: I'm confused. Find some more coins so I can come back.

Hank: OK, coins. There's one right here. Well this is neat.

Katherine: Get in that pipe, to go fight that (? 10:20) brother.

Hank: Maybe, maybe I'm just gonna fight all by myself. I got three hit-points though, I can do this. I can do this. I'm a big man. She got shuriken! Where you going? Which one is you? Is you this one?

Katherine: Nope.

Hank: Nope. Definitely not. It's this one. Pinkie with a pink star, that's how you tell. There's gonna be four of them now.

Katherine: Left!

Hank: Yeah, I've got so many lives... all right, up there.

Katherine: You can do it, you can do it, you can do-- Back! Back! Back!

Hank: Oh gosh.

Katherine: You got it, you got it! (both cheer)

Hank: Take that you little pink monster!

Katherine: Get all the coins. Get ALL the coins!

Hank: Yeah, I can get all the coins this time because I don't have to compete with you for whatever-- no, there's no star, even. I got three-- We got three stars, we got all three stars!

Katherine: You got all three stars.

Hank: I am feeling accomplished!

Katherine: You really killed this one.

Hank: I did well.

Katherine: All by yourself.

Hank: I'm-- I think I might win this one, Katherine. 

Katherine: You might.

Hank: I think I might get the most points of all... people.

Katherine: Yeah. Don't fall off the edge.

Hank: (laughs) that would be really embarrassing. Hey, I got a thing. I got a-- 

Katherine: Luigi!

Hank: You want to finish with me?

Katherine: Hello, Luigi want to come.

Hank: Yay, oh you got 10,000 points because you can jump SO HIGH all the time. You are such a high jumper.

Katherine: You wanna trade? You wanna be--

Hank: No, I want to be Mario. (whiny sounds)

Katherine: Then-a no complaining.

Hank: OK. OK, got it. I'm good.

Katherine: You could be Peach, if you want. She glidey. 

Hank: She glides?

Katherine: Yes.

Hank: All the time?

Katherine: Yeah.

Hank: Like a raccoon all the time? I won.

Katherine: Yes, well I was dead for most of the level.

Hank: yes, I feel quite accomplished. Was that-- Was that a castle? Was that the end of the level?

Katherine: It looks like it.

Hank: p-ching, look there's a big star on the top of it.

Katherine: It looks very much like the end.

Hank: Hey there sweetie-pants. I feel like that was-- I feel like I'm in the 50s and she's my waitress and I just called her sweetie-pants and not feel guilty about it.

Katherine: You should feel guilty about that.

Hank: I feel guilty about that. Thanks for the glass pipe! We're gonna go to level four, Katherine. We've never been that far.

Katherine: Oooh, I don't want to do that.

Hank: Choo choo! I can't believe we got all three stars, that is ridiculously exciting to me. Like really should not be so exciting.

Katherine: Yeah, considering you don't give a crap about the stars on the normal levels.

Hank: I think that we need them.

Katherine: I think you do, too, but you've never...

Hank: Shown any interest?

Katherine: Yeah!

Hank: Previously.

Katherine: Yeah. Are you learning?

Hank: I care now.

Katherine: One coin.

Hank: Oh, you can go faster. Wheeee, look at my little butt! Butt butt butt butt butt butt butt butt butt butt butt wheeee. Oh. Get in there. That was hard.

Thanks for watching this episode of Hank and Katherine play Super Mario World 3D U XP, this has-- wait, no nevermind, there's a party going on. Let's let the party happen.

Katherine: The party tent.

Hank: The party tent has arrived. Um, the Bowser Circus is in town, it's an intermediate level. Uh-oh! There's a stopper in the pipe!

Katherine: You knew it had to be too easy.

Hank: It was too easy.

Katherine: You knew it was too easy.

Hank: It was too easy. All right, well we're gonna face this Bowser castle-tent on the next level of Super Mario World Wii Wednesday Wife XP 3D U World. Seven.

Katherine: Goodbye.