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Duration:12:56
Uploaded:2013-08-05
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In which John talks about the casting of The Fault in Our Stars movie. The Swoodilypoopers play Southampton.

Follow the Swoodilypoopers on Twitter: @SwindonSwoodily

Hello and welcome to Hank Games without Hank, where the Swindon Town Swoodilypoopers supporters continue to raise their scarves aloft despite the fact that we are in 7th. What's happened? A lot of draws. A lot of draws. We need to get a win. We need to get a bunch of wins, and we need to get them all in a row. We are good enough to be winners and I don't know why we aren't.

We have Silva e Silva, Ginger Rampage upfront. I'm starting this time John Green and Andy Rooney because I just don't feel like John Green and Leroy Williamson have proved to be the strike partnership that I'm looking for.

Look, there's no question that we're hurting without Bald John Green this season, but what could I do? We couldn't afford him.

Um, today I'm going to talk about the casting of The Fault in Our Stars movie. You know who we can afford? Green Eggs and Foderingham. He's been off and on about whether he wants to stay with the Swoodilypoopers but, um, he has signed a contract, so he has no choice. Am I willing to hold him hostage? In a word: yes.

So, this is being recorded in the past because of my paternity leave so it may be that more casting has been announced between now and the future. I know some casting possibilities.

The interesting thing I will tell you is that until- Oh it's gotta be and it isn't! Until-what? What happened? Is someone getting a white-a yellow card for being naughty? D. Motherflippin Fox? It's nice to see him getting work, albeit not with Swindon Town. Oh yeah, that was a yellow card. Who is this referee?

So, here's an interesting fact about like, movie casting and Hollywood. You would think that these things are decided for months before you find out about them. But, in fact, they are decided for, like, an hour. As an example, I saw Ansel Elgort, the man who has been cast as Augustus Waters. I saw his audition maybe three days before the casting decision was made. And then I, you know, there were a bunch of calls with various people at the studio and the producers and the director and stuff, and everybody talking about how much they liked Ansel and yadda yadda yadda.

So that happened. Those calls happened and then the decision, the final decision that it was going to be Ansel was made. And then within an hour, literally I was at the gym when I got the call saying: "Okay, we're going to do it". And I was like: "Yay, I love him so much and I'm so happy. Yay!" I was at the gym, I finished my workout and it was on - OH!

Who is it? It's Bostock! He still doesn't have a song! I can't even, I don't know what to sing! "Are you Messi? Are you Messi? Are you Messi in disguise?" Bostock! How did he get to be so fast and talented? He scores when he wants. That's another song- that's what I should have sung. Hopefully he'll score again so I can sing that.

So yeah, it just happens so fast after the actual decision is made because otherwise it will leak. But yeah, it was very - He's offside! That man was offside! Oh, he was offside!

Why do I - I scored an early goal Meredith and then I give up a goal and life is full of disappointments. He was clearly unambiguously offside! I don't-I don't- I was trying to play the offside. I hate this game.

So, yeah. As I- as I record this Ansel Elgort has been cast as Augustus and he's really great. I mean, you know, no one's- none of his movie work has actually come out yet, so nobody can really have an opinion on him, I guess. But having seen his audition, like it's really -OH! It's in!

Oh, "He's big, he's tough, he has a brilliant puff. Other John Green, Other John Green." I think Andy Rooney has been good for this strike team, even though we haven't gotten many touches because I think he's just attracting the right kind of attention.

This is good, this is what I wanted. 2-1, 2-1 ahead. We can go more ahead. This is it, this is it. This is our big- This is when we come out of our doldrums, our mid-season doldrums. So, he's really great. So he's been cast as Augustus and the brilliant Shailene Woodley has been cast as Hazel.

I can't say enough about both of them and I can't say enough about them together. Together they just, they're- I mean, everybody who saw their audition was just like: "Wow, they are something else together". There's a great line, and I keep saying this to people who ask me about it- Oh god. Green Eggs and Foderingham!

There's a great line in a Philip Roth novel "The Human Stain" where a woman says to a man, "The pleasure isn't in owning a person, the pleasure is in having a contender in the room with you" and that's very much how I feel about Shailene and Ansel together. They are contenders in the room with each other and it's really, really cool. I have great hopes for that. That the ultimate strike partnership, Hazel and Augustus, I think are gonna be great. I was on side! You are a liar! You're- sorry-You're a filthy, dirty liar. You put that off screen because we both know it was dishonest.

So, there may be more casting by then. I know some, like, casting rumours but I don't know anything confirmed. So I'm not lying to you when I say I really don't- Oh! That was going to be great, but instead it's not. I really don't know anything other than, other than what you know. Although future you probably knows more than present me.

But, I hope that the cast comes together really well and that everybody's happy and that it's most importantly people that it's who are committed to the project. The great thing about both Ansel and Shailene is that they really, really love the book.

Like I think- Yeah, I mean I got an email from Shailene before any of this even started about how much she loved the book and I know Ansel considers it one of his favorite books. So it's really special that-OH!

Get in! Get in the goal! Do the robot, do the robot! I gotta think of another song for John Green because he scores so much, he deserves two songs. "He scores when he wants, he scores when he wants. Other John Green, he scores when he wants." I should just call him our remaining John Green since he's not really Other John Green anymore. 3-1 against Southampton. This is what we needed. This is Swoodilypooper football.

Let's have a great second half, boys. So I think- I feel good about it. The process of, you know- being involved for this process is something  I really did not expect and even when- you know, even when they said: "You're going to be involved in every stage of the process", I was like: "Yeah, right. Hollywood lies". But in fact, I have been, really have been and I've been really- they've been really nice to make me- to take my voice seriously in all of this, even though I know I don't know anything about movies.

But yeah, I hope that it continues to be people who are really passionate about the book and really care about it. I guess the big outstanding roles are for Hazel's parent and Peter Van Houten. I'd love- Yeah, Peter Van Houten will be an interesting cast- casting moment. But-Oh! Oh! Mmm, I mean I like the idea. I don't really know- I don't know exactly where you were going with that but that was the best build up play we've had all season. It was a terrible finish, but the build up play, which I think involved three episodes of the Y button, was really, really attractive.

So yeah, I-I mean, I'm starting to feel like this movie is gonna happen and I'm really hopeful that it's gonna be good. You know, it's tremendous- it's tremendous pressure on everybody. I think everybody feels that because they know- they know that there are a lot of people who really love the book and care about it, and will feel- I think will feel- If they feel like the movie doesn't reflect the spirit of the book, that those people will feel very, kind of hurt, for lack of a better word.

And, you know, I still believe that nothing affects the text of a novel and the book doesn't change whether the movie's great or if it's terrible. But I know, I know how important the movie is and if it's gonna be made- and it looks like it's gonna be made- I want it to be, you know, as good as it can possibly be.

And I really feel like the people who are around it are the right people. Like I think the director, Josh Boone, really understands this kind of story. I think he understands smart teenagers really well. I think once everybody sees his movie Stuck in Love which, I guess, is out now. Now as you're watching, not as I'm talking about this. So you may have already seen his movie Stuck in Love. Man, the future is magnificent!

Meredith, what if something terrible has happened? Like, I don't know. Macedonia has been destroyed or something and the whole world is different and I'm sitting here talking about everything from the past, as if it was all hunky-dory. And they're like: "John! How can he not be addressing the destruction of Macedonia?". I don't know, I don't know about it! I picked Macedonia because I think they're in good shape right now.

But, you never know! It could be- It could be Macedonia. I'm taking- I'm going to put in Gerry Coke. He's been cranky about his playing time, which you know, fair enough. He hasn't had any because Maric Maric and Bostock have both been absolutely fantastic. I think we're just going to leave everybody else in.

You know, it's hard- Right now it's interesting because as bad as the Swoodilypoopers are playing, there's a lot of people who feel like they're not getting enough playing time and I'm like: "Well. I mean, you know. If we were winning more, we would be rotating..." I don't know! I don't know. What do I know about managing a soccer team?

So, the other thing to remember, though, is that casting is only one small part of a movie. And that the way we sort of, like- What happens when we imagine, you know, Person X as Isaac or Person Y as Peter Van Houten is not necessarily what they're gonna look like or act like.

I mean, I think back to when Nicole Kidman was Virginia Woolf in The Hours and I was like: "Are you freaking kidding me?". But then she looked and talked exactly like I imagined Virginia Woolf and she became Virginia Woolf to me. The Liberace HBO movie, Michael Douglas as Liberace? Are you kidding me? Now, the vast majority of people watching the Swoodilypoopers do not know who either Michael Douglas or Liberace is. However, I assure you that that was a very strange casting choice- OH! It had to be, but it wasn't. It wasn't. I believe I've been fouled and there has been an injustice, but the world, as usual, fails to bend to my will.

Oh! You know, I will say Andy Rooney has had a bit of a tough game, just in terms of holding on to possession. That was a great tackle from someone, although it was for nothing in the end. So, my general feeling- Oh no! Anything but this! Oh, it worked out perfectly. My general feeling when it comes to all of this stuff is you kind of have to wait and see. You know, you want to be able to draw conclusions immediately, but unless and until they make a movie and you can judge a movie on its merits, it's hard to say- Oh no. It's hard to say X or Y, it's hard to say this is good casting or bad casting because even if you have -as I have- even if you have seen  the- you know, even if you have seen some of the auditions or whatever, you know, people aren't always the same in auditions that they are on set. And I don't know, I mean- And also, we all need to accept the fact that we don't know- OH! He does score occasionally, but no. We all need to accept the fact that we don't know if a movie's good or not until we see the movie.

Thank you for watching. Ugh, finally we are back in the win column. We are saluting our supporters because they stuck with us through our time of trial. Hopefully we're back up to sixth now, and hopefully we can make a run- Oh, I love to see my opponents squat in shame. Best wishes.