Previous: Back Home - Did I Miss a Day?
Next: How I Met My Wife



View count:130,678
Last sync:2024-06-14 22:45
In which Hank and Stefan are odd.

Hank: Ooh, why.. why does that look so terrible?

Today we're gonna talk about white balance!  This is bad white balance.

Okay I've given up trying I'm just back at... back on, um, auto now.

Stefan: Okay.

Hank: I'm get- uh, and Stefan is here!

Stefan: Hey!

Hank: Stefan was helping me with a video, which is exporting now for tomorrow's Vlogbrothers!  How you doing, Stefan?

Stefan: I'm good, I didn't know I was gonna be VEDA-ing.

Hank: Yeah.  Sorry, I just stroked your inner thigh with my toe.

Stefan: *laughs*

Hank: I should have put you in my sexuality video, you're sexually complicated.

Stefan: Am... Am I?

Hank: You're always...

Stefan: Am I...

Hank: Flirting with me. I told him...

Stefan: That's not very complicated, just...

Hank: I told him- I told Stefan to bring- bring Magic cards over for when we finish this, we could play some Magic and he said, "I'll bring you my big black deck."


Stefan: Yeah, It's cause I'm just a comedian. I don't wanna explore your body in any kind of way other than maybe a massage, or something.

*Hank laughs*

Stefan: But, we can make each other feel good, in a non-sexual way.

Hank: *laughing* This is not- I don't know that that's- I don't know that you're helping yourself.  "We can make each other feel good in a non-sexual way..." *strokes Stefan's face*

You can't...

Stefan: Well stroking, is...

Hank: ... stop making the joke, though.  I- I can't, either.

I had a hard time when I was growing up, figuring out that I was straight because I liked girls a lot, and I didn't really like guys, but I liked guys a little bit.  And so I thought that meant I was super gay. *laughing* 'Cause if you like guys at all, that means you're gay, and it doesn't matter how you feel about girls.  Also... 

Stefan: D-

Hank: Can you just turn that light on? Maybe that would fix something.

Stefan: Oh.

Well, do you think you're bisexual at all?

Hank: Yeah, I think I'm- I'm a little bit bi. But, like, it's so- it's such, like, a bag of worms to open up that I'm, like, neh, not bi enough to... care.

Stefan: Well, to label yourself than way.

Hank: Yeah.

Stefan: Every once in a while, I- I wonder if I'm gay.

Hank: Yeah. Well that was like my entire teenage years.

Stefan: And I think about it, and I have to sh- like, like I take time, meditate on it, you know...

Hank: You have to, like, look at gay porn, and be like, *Stefan laughing* "What do I think about this?"

Stefan: Not- not exactly that, but um, maybe I should try that one out.
Every- every time I come to the conclusion that I'm absolutely, zero percent gay, which...

Hank: Yeah...

Stefan: Honestly, it's a little disappointing?  In some ways?


It's like you're cutting off half of the pool, man.

Hank: And the other thing was that I liked all kinds of girly stuff.

Stefan: Oh man...

Hank: Like Ze and his Lisa Frank stickers.

Stefan: Yeah, I played with Polly Pocket, when I was younger.

Hank: Mhm.  I had My Little Ponies.

Stefan: Okay, yeah, yeah... 

Hank: All- which, now is normal.  But wasn't normal back then.  I mean, not "normal", but it's common.  Like, there are a lot of, like, it's a thing, there's a whole subculture.

Stefan: Yeah, yeah.

Hank: When I was- it was not.  But like, even, like, into my sexual years, I- like all my friends were girls, and I liked to like, put on makeup, and, um, and, like, do the goth thing... 

Stefan: Mhm.

Hank: ... and be all emo, with my friends, and- but like, the- the like fact m- like, ninety five percent of my sexual energy was directly related to, like, boobs and not penises...

Stefan: Yeah.

Hank: ... and, like, girl-shaped people.  And also, so did like drinking a cup of water with your pinky out. Like, that's...

Stefan: Huh.

Hank: ... you gotta be gay, then. 

Stefan: Uh- that's the logical conclusion. 

Hank: And I had- and I have a tiny little bit of a lisp.

Stefan: I- that's not what I thought you were gonna say.

Hank: What were you gonna say?

Stefan: I don't want to say.

Hank: The camera stopped rolling during the part where we talked about prison gayness and butt sex.


Stefan: Yeah.  That would have gotten cut out anyway, Hank.

Hank: Probably.

Tomorrow I'm uploading this video about sexual orientation. I didn't put any of my personal feelings in it but I did put that in this video. So you're, uh- now you have some background, uh- as to where that video cane from.  I'm very excited about this new video, it's very different from anything that I've ever done. Thanks to Stefan for helping me out with it.

Stefan: It's good- It's a good video.

Hank: Thanks.  Um, I've never done anything like it, and it was super fun. It felt like I was making a documentary film.  I can do that, now, apparently.  Skills. 

Stefan: Hell yeah.