Daniel: Is it on? How's the smart face looking?
Hank: It looks awesome, you know your face looks good!
Daniel: Yeah, no big surprise.
Hank: Don't, don't think...

?: Basically, this comes up an then these things get[[[[[ turned around. Okay? And then that happens. Oh god, I lost a little bit of jalapeño.

?:Our cat is dressed as a dog. Hi.
Hank: It's a really great costume.
?: I'll show you what's vaguely sexual, check this out.
?: Oh, OH. That is vague.
?: You like that? 'couse I know you don't.
Hank and others: *singing* Once there was this king who got into a accident and couldn't go to school.

Hank: Hey guys.
Lee: Hi.
Elliott: Hey.
Lee: How are you?
Elliott: Thank you for coming in.
Hank: You guys are different sizes.
Lee: That happens a lot. I could stand next to Elliot and he wouldn't even know I was there.
Elliott: Yes, it's true, I do it all the time.
Hank: You just walk into her? I do that to toddlers sometimes.
Lee: Hey, listen!
Elliott: What? What?!
Lee: Listen to me!
Elliott: Where is...
Lee: Listen to me!
Elliott: Oh my gosh
Hank: Have you ever just walked right into a toddler, like they're right, like right there and you just like *pssh* And then they're on the floor, like six.
Lee: 100 %
Hank: I've only kicked like three kids on purpose.

Elliott: We look our editors in this room.
Lee: mmhm.
Hank: It's a nice room though, it's glass walls, glass walls, glass-wall-prison.
Lee: We call it the fish bowl.
Hank: Woah! What's that?
Lee: What's that? It's Gary Oldman
Joe: Hello.

Hank: What's in there? 
Phil: What?
Hank: This is your actual job, you sit on a couch and you try to come up with intelligent things to say.
Phil: Sometimes.
Hank: It's pretty much my job too.
Phil: No, I just stand right there and then I look at the camera and I go "whaa? whaa, what do I say? This thing, this thing. No, okay, too many syllables"

Hank: I love this lens.
Phil: But it's great.
Hank: Superwide.
Phil: That is good. I will show you mine now. NO!

Phil: I've never seen you do this kind of video.
Hank: Oh, I do. You just don't see them because no-one watches them.
Phil: Wait, do you have like a second channel?
Hank: Yeah, hankschannel.
Phil: WHAT? How did I not know?
Hank: Well, haha

Katherine: I found a dime in the floor, on the floor in the (?)
Hank: Oh wow
Phil (?): Thank you
Hank: Donation. What do we get for our sponsorship?
Phil: hmmm, hmmm
Katherine: The privilege of being here? 
Phil: The privilege? I'm glad you said that, if I said that it comes off way more.

Hank: What do you got there?
Lee: I got a VidCon bag from the third annual.
Hank: you really just use, you actually use that bag?
Lee: I use this bag! I really do! I really do!
Elliott: I use the bag all the time. I get discounts for grocery shopping (?)
Lee: The coolest part of it is that one kid saw me using this bag and he was like "aw, VidCon, oh, Lee Newton" It was really funny. It was really sweet.

Hank: You are not in a good place mentally? Because you were late to our appointment? 
Tyler: Is that video or picture?
Hank: Are you shy? Are you shy on camera?
Tyler: No, but I can feel myself blushing.
Hank: You do, you are red.
Tyler: I feel my entire face like a tomato right now
Hank: You do look a little tomato-y 
Tyler: Hi world.
Hank: You blush really easily, don't you?
Tyler: Just driving. I'm just concerned I'm gonna total the car now that it'll be on camera.
Hank: We're going three miles per hour
Tyler: I will find a way, is that a challenge?