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View count:18,152
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Dislikes:3
Comments:157
Duration:12:27
Uploaded:2011-02-26
Last sync:2018-11-10 19:30
In which Hank gets some parachutes and fails at using them, and then kills a Borgia captain.
Hank: Hello! Last time on Hank Green plays Assassin's Creed Brotherhood I--

Leonardo: News has spread that all my--

Hank: blew up a tank!

Leonardo: --inventions have been destroyed. The disarray allowed me to work on something just for you.

Hank: Oh Great!

Ezio: What is this?

Leonardo: A new device to drift slowly from any height. It is not as cumbersome as my flying machine. You can take it everywhere.

Hank: Ohhh! I finally got the thingy!

Ezio: Grazie Leonardo

Hank: Sweet. I can now fall off of high buildings! Safely. Last time on Hank Green plays Assassin's Creed Brotherhood 2.0 I blew up a tank and apparently that unlocked me being able to get a parachute. Isn't that cool? Uh so now I kinda wanna climb - visit a tailor to buy the parachute. Why didn't he just give it to me? I don't understand this madness! Why didn't he just give me the parachute, he makes me buy it?

Woman: What the devil is he doing?

Hank: What the devil are you doing woman. I'm going to the bank. Are you doing something crazier than that? Is that the craziest thing you've ever heard? Of a man going to the bank to withdraw some money potentially? Climbing a building? 'Cos he would like to be able to pay for his parachute which his friend decided to not give him but to make him buy? from a tailor?

Hello. I bet all of your guests visit that way. Withdraw money? Thank you. Yes. Uh yes. Back. OK. Umm, so now I have to visit a tailor. I don't know what a tailor looks like. Hello tailor. Taily-tailimy. That's a blacksmith, that's a horse, that's a closed blacksmith, that's a poster. Tailor... what do you look like? This one with the threads that I never unlock because they're so useless! Great that direction. This direction.

Not misdirection, but this direction! If you could climb walls faster Ezio, that would be great because the slowness with which we operate... Hi. Excuse me, hi. Sorry I had to kill you, but that's how I operate. Don't fall! Yes that is the correct direction to fall, because I need to search you for crossbow bolts. Why don't you ever have any crossbow bolts? You bastards.

I love the way that Rome is built, just so organic. It's like a - not planned, like a machine, like a living, a living thing. Not like a machine. Like an animal, like a protozoa. Hey, are you worried about me? You shouldn't be. Because we should be friends. You always fall so slowly it makes it hard for me to search you. Crossbow bolts! Yes, times three my favorite!

I love a good - all right! we have arrived at WAH the tailor. Ish. Nearby. Hi! Sorry! Sorry friend, you are my buddy, my bad. What where is it? tailor? Why is this building so large?

Man: Am I dreaming this?

Hank: Yes! Really? Because I'm awesome, I don't know if you've heard. Where is this tailor I've heard so much about? OK. I'm sure that it's nearby. Yes, there it is. What? Drop, drop, drop.

Hello. Let's Y to examine. Yes I want to upgrade it. Of course I do why wouldn't I? Fabro. Sarto I mean. Hello. Yes, tail me. I need to be tailified. Parachutes. Oh I can buy more of them! I'm an idiot child! I'm the Stupidest face, man!

Tailor: Perhaps another time

Hank: Yeah perhaps. How do you use them, anybody? How do you use the parachutes? Wish I could hear from you directly immediately? Let's climb some place high so we can try it out. Is this high enough? It looks pretty high. Apparently that wasn't high enough. I felt like that was pretty high but uh, I didn't even really get hurt by that.

Well that's dum. So what's what's going on out here? In the world? There are no... All of those Assassin's Recruits seem to have disappeared because I didn't save them fast enough? No, they're over here. Those are contracts, not recruits. Aww Man. Woah! Zoomed way in. Way in too much. Ok there is this over here. A Lair of Romulus, a Borgia tower, and this is a Viewpoint, there's all kinds of Borgia towers down there. Assassination Contract, I don't like Assassination Contracts. It makes me sad that I have to kill people.

Uhm. There's a Borgia Tower right here...that I have not gotten. That sounds like something to do today. Hello money. How are you doing today? Cardinal's purple dye! That's excellent news! I think I need that for some reason. All right Borgia Tower, it's just you and me...and my parachute.

Uh tu tu, no, oh wow. I don't understand, no one told me what button to push to use the parachute. I'm going to feel very stupid the first time I fall off a building and I have a parachute available and I do not use it 'cause I don't know how. Just gonna shove every button I know. Every button I've ever heard of.

Well that time I didn't need a parachute 'cause there was a hay bale, love the hay bale. Hello Borgia Tower. Do I have any bullets? I do. Bullets are important when taking on the Borgia captains. Entering Dominico de Padova's territory. Kill him to remove the Borgia influence.

Yes sir. Hello? I love to kill. I love to kill. I hear sparkly bits. Love the...Cardinal's purple dye! What does that say? It says Vek17--I didn't know what that said! I don't know what I got, stupid Vek17!

Where is the captain? Borgia captain, where are you? I need your little--there it is. Over there. That seems far away. Well-protected. Hello I need to highlight you so I can ki--weh..no...I don't know why you did that sir, but it seems idiotic now doesn't it?

Can I shoot you from here? I cannot. Oh! What the frack?! Ah that was lame! Ooh there's a lot of them. That's now who I want to shoot. I don't want to shoot those people. I want to shoot the captain! of the Borgia!

Ayyy? with the spazzy? I don't need that! Oh that's 'cause I'm locked onto someone. Okay. Now time for the gun! Yes! Borgia captain deaded! And everyone is like "I don't know what is going on this is crazy talk, crazy time! I don't understand what happened to my poor Borgia captain". Pussies. Can't live without your captain? You need to learn. Learn from me Ezio Auditore. I fall over and over again the same way, off of things.

What are you? Oh you're the person who lowers my notoriety. Actually I do, I kinda need to kill you. I kind of do. I need to kill--I need to lower my notoriety by killing a man. That's how it works I don't know if you've heard. Ok, moving on, moving up, up the Borgia tower, which is so annoying. I got this...no. I cannot.

[singing:] Why is the Borgia tower so annoying?
Why is it so annoying sir?
Oh my, oh my, why do they make it so hard to climb?
I don't play this game so i can climb all the time.
Borgia tower. Borge-borgia tower. That time I didn't get it. But I'll get on this. And grub dub and glup up and ship ip and up to the tower so I can ignite it or ignite the tower and things will go better for Italy and Rome.

Peow! They make those things way too flammable. That's how I feel. All right. Well, that is the end of this episode of Hank Green Plays Assassin's Creed Brotherhood 2.0. Next time you will not see me and I will not see you, but you will hear me, on Hank Plays Assassin's Creed Brotherhood 2.0. Goodbye!