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Dr. Lindsey Doe: When I'm asked, "Lindsey, how do I be you? How do I be a sexologist?" usually there are cookies, milk, a notebook, and pen involved. Then I say, "You're already doing it. You're already being a sexologist -- a student of sexuality right now." To which you might reply, "No, a recognized sexologist with a degree and a paycheck!" And then I'd share my recommendations for dream job acquisition, sexologist or not -- there is a formula I give to budding professionals that looks something like this.

Take some classes and some notes.

Start and keep updated a CV. "CV" is a curriculum vita. It's the course of one's life, like the HD version of a resumé.

Volunteer. Make connections. Join and attend like-minded groups.

Most importantly, keep your individuality. Individuality!

Most of you are in high school, some of you have finished your doctorates... great. All you all need to start with a class. Maybe your class is Sexplanations, but please go further because there is more education in your future if you're gonna be a sexologist like me or any professional. You might as well try the whole "learning about sexuality" thing before you make a career of it!

No matter what your future holds, you're gonna need to keep learning about your field. If I stopped studying after my first human sexuality class, I'd know 0.01% of what I know now, not to mention what I have left to learn. More classes! Aw. Yeah! And then involvement and mentors and DFTBA.

So this is what I did, starting in middle school: composition notebooks. I'd write about my life and then inevitably the things I learned about sex were recorded on pages. Ah, like "bike" being a euphemism for "penis". Even though my girlfriends and I weren't sure what a penis was, we still liked to ask boys in our class if they had a bike and if they wore helmets. Ooh, it was so funny to us!

I collected stories like this and investigated the things I didn't know, like asking my male friend, "Do your balls get hard like a boner?" To which he answered, "They're semi-hard all the time." That is a sexologist, age 12.

From there, I began reading about sexuality more, talking about it more, doing projects, presentations, and papers on sexually-related topics.... My senior thesis in high school was about subliminal messages, like women and ice cubes and unconsciously audible sex messages. In college I continued with the trend of sex in every subject -- Native American Studies, French, English, Con, Russian, Statistics.... I wrote papers on Freud and the Kama Sutra. I did a comparative study of sex education curriculums. My maths was, "How many 18 wheelers of semen are ejaculated daily?"

And I also took human sexuality. I was unashamed of my interests. I accepted that I had them.

I began researching programs for my Master's and came across a website similar to this one, with a lot of options. I kept researching. I read reviews of the schools and learned who a lot of the big names were in the field. Then I took out my first sexology volunteer position, as a sex educator for a sex-positive forum for teens.

Volunteering puts something on your face, a kind of energy that is really attractive to employers. A giving glow. You go from stocking the wall with condoms to owning your own sex shop. I can't stress enough how important it is to volunteer, to put in your time as a humble servant, be around the people who are gonna teach you, and to learn all the facets of sexology. It's an excellent way to make connections too! Volunteering, I met the movers and shakers at every sexual health organization in my town. You know who you are.

But you're gonna have your own unique path, your own transcript, resumé, and job description. Maybe even a stack of your own published work and an office with your own decor. If you'd like some more tips on sexology, the career, you can check out Twelve Months To Your Ideal Private Practice, which my dog chewed, or a book I don't have, How I Got Into Sex in your pants. The American Association of Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, or AASECT, is also a great resource.

Eating ALL the cookies! Bye!

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