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In which Hank talks about the unsung Apollo Astronaut and why he is, for some reason, guessed as lame people on


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A Bunny
( - -)
((') (')
Good morning, John.

I wish that I had turned on the camera, like, five minutes ago when this happened, BUT, I was just playing and I was playing and it asked me all kinds of questions and I was laughing about how they applied to you or didn't apply to you, it's so funny. "Was he popular in the 1980s?" And I'm like, "No, he was not popular in the 1980s." And it was like, "Does he wear makeup?" And I was like, "No; obviously kinda hot in Indianapolis." Kinda shiny. And it kept asking if you like, played sports or used a ball or were right-handed or played in the NFL. I was like, "This thing is so off; it's like, two billion percent off." And then it guessed you were Neil Armstrong.

Wrong. And then it guessed Rodney Mullen, and I'm like, "Who's Rodney Mullen?" And it asked if you were young, and I hovered back and forth, not really sure- not old, but young...? So I said yes, you were young, and then it said: "I am guessing John Green - Author." 20Q!

Damn! You ARE good! As far as I'm concerned, this is the definition of famous, John.

You are now, officially, famous. 20Q got you in 22 questions. It popped up, John Green - Author, and I was like "P'uh?" This is definitely Nerdfighters' doing - I am not under any illusions - but, amazing. High-five.

OK, and I just checked that it got the answer right and it said, "Are you sure John Green is part of a team? Other users clicked that he wasn't part of a team." Hey, now! What is this?

You don't think that this is a team? So, yeah, it thought that I was Perez Hilton, it thought you were Neil Armstrong, and then it actually got you. I'm gonna look up who Rodney Mullen is and see if that guy's embarrassing.

God- dam- damn! Gee, Rodney Mullen is, like, a super-awesome skateboarder! I get Perez Hilton! (*whiny*) It's getting worse and worse, I just played as me, and it thinks I'm Joe Jonas!

Oh, God! What is it about this? Also, it occurs to me that Neil Armstrong: Also part of a team.

Poor Michael Collins; I mean, at least people know who Buzz Aldrin is, but nobody even knows who Michael Collins is, and he didn't even get to walk on the moon! Oh, Mike. Mike Mike Mike.

I'm sure you're doin' fine, I'm not worried about you or anything, but, y'know, just sayin'. "Hey, how's it going out there, guys? Everything lookin' cool and- yeah, you're playin' golf, heh! That sounds like fun!" I'm- OK, OK, I'm gonna try to 20Q Mike Collins and see if it gets Mike.

Question 17, 20Q makes its first guess: "Are you Neil Armstrong?" No, I'm not Neil Armstrong! I will never be Neil Armstrong! Question 20: "I am guessing that you are Buzz Aldrin." I mean, this must be Mike's entire life, just summed up in a round of 20Q, but I don't think I can really blame 20Q for this because at the end, it was like "Other people said that you died an untimely death." He is not dead!

Maybe ya haven't heard very much about him, lately. Mike: This one's for you. I don't know what this "one" is; this one?

Or, this one? Or, this one? Or, this one?

I- you can have 'em all, Mike. They're all for you. Moral of the story is, I shouldn't be upset if 20Q doesn't know who I am; I haven't even been to the moon!

But congratulations, John: You are officially more famous than the dude who went to the moon but didn't get out of the boat, so obviously, you kick ass. Thank you for being my brother. And, you will see me, tomorrow.