(What's coming!)
(singing) Somebody once told me the world is going to roll me,
I ain't (voice cracks) the sharpest tool in the shed...

(Hank) Hello, and welcome to Games with Hank, where we play Games with Hank, by which I mean I play games by myself, and you watch. I'm Hank, and toady we're going to be playing a game called Stage Presence. The idea of the game here is that I'm just supposed to keep people entertained - I'm in a band, which I am, in a band, and all of our equipment breaks, and then I have to keep people entertained.

That's not actually a scenario that is unfamiliar to me; I have definitely been in places where, not because my stuff broke, but because of other reasons, I have to just sort of fill time, and be like, "Hey, it's like this... gonna, like, have a good... make sure that you don't get too bored!"

So, without further ado, everyone, this is Stage Presence!

(in game)
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Hello Clevelaaaaaaaaaaaaand!! That's such a big ball! Whoa, exploding! No, the balls! No, that's bad enough... Ow, I hit my microphone with my head!!! AAAAHHHH, WHOOOOO (gibberish)!!!!!!!

Apparently two minutes and fifty-two seconds, to keep, to just keep being entertaining! One time, I went to the mall, and there was a girl there, and she had like leather boots.

And sometimes giant balls just appear!! For no reason, from nowhere, they just happen!! It's a whole... I know, it's exciting!!! It's a whole new, like, space-time thing... oh my God, that was a big ball!!

I kind of want to see what would happen if I'm just not interesting for a while. Oh look, little fire. I keep running into this thing.

(jeers from the crowd) Ohhhh! Never mind... aah beer! Electric, your electric beer! It was so bright, and so yellow! Yellower than I expect a beer to be! What kind of energy drinks are you drinking in this place!

It doesn't make sense! Do you make sense! Do I make sense! Does sense make sense!? That's right! You're excited, I'm excited, everybody's getting excited!

All you gotta do is talk loudly and scream and people are, stop throwing... oh no, that's... stop throwing Molotov cocktail beers at me! I'm trying to catch it! And throw it back at you, dickwads! Come on!

Apparently making... (sings)
Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't (voice cracking) the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead (sobbing)

(talks) Did you like that? You like Smash Mouth, is that better? So have you ever seen the movie E.T.? It's pretty good, right? You guys E.T. fans, do I have any E.T. fans out there? (chanting) E.T.! E.T.! E.T.'s meant for me! E.T.! E.T.! E.T.'s the man for me! Whoooo!

(rock band starts playing) Thank you Cleveland!!!!!

(back in office) Thanks for watching. That was Stage Presence. I think we all can see that the moral of the story is, that sometimes giant balloon balls appear out of nowhere, and that there are alternate universes where beer is neon yellow. Also, people like it when you sing Smash Mouth while crying.

Thanks for watching this episode of Games with Hank. There will be another episode tomorrow, because there's episodes every single day of the year! With possible exceptions for when we get really, really tired.

DFTBA.