(Intro - I'm so bad at game!)

John: Oh!
Hank: Your son is sleeping up stairs.
J: What? Too much? Too much?

J: ...and we knew the world was gonna see. Oh, beautiful.
H: Yes! That was such a... That was an amazing goal. That was an amazing goal. Does everybody agree with me? That that was an amazing goal?
J: Yes.
H: Look at this replay.
J: That was, that was really nice.
H: Bop!

J: When I was, um...
H: Oh shoot! Oh, you gotta concentrate now?
J: Ohohoho.
H: Wow, that was a bad start for Hank Green.
J: Lionel Messi, the best player in the world.

J: Oh oh. I'm not going to talk for a second.
H: 'Cause things are happening. Oh man! How do you get past?
J: Oh you can't... Hank, the problem is you can't stop Da... David Villa.

J: You're, like, trying to pass and stuff. I'm just dribbling and assuming that you're gonna run in the wrong direction. That's worked out really well for me so far.

H: Get to him everyone! Why don't you play soccer? Oh, that went in!
J: Ohoho. Iniesta.
H: Oh man.

J: Come on Swindon Town.
H: Oh, wh... why do you...
J: D'oh, Swindon Town!

J: Top notch goal scoring right here. (Laughs)
H: Totally.
J: It hit the post, it hit the post and then it just, I think it hit him in the belly.
H: I call hand ball. I call hand ball.
J: Well, if there was a hand, it was the hand of God.

H: What the frick!
J: Finally!
H: Oh, there it is.

J: ...Oh! Thank you!
H: (Laughing) Damn it.
J: Oh! What a mistake!

H: Oh, well done. Well done sir.
J: Off the post. Go, score! Yes!
H: That has to be a goal. Oh man. Three - nil.
J: Wayne Rooney.

J: Goal.
H: Yeah, that's a goal. That's Hank Green with a goal.
J: Frank Lampard.

H: Everybody slide tackle. Everybody slide tackle.
J: Oh, it's a goal!
H: Oh! Four - one!
J: Wayne Rooney gets his hat-trick.

H: Did you see how my guy just, like, stood there and looked at him? Like "Oh I'll watch that happen."
J: Yeah. That's gonna be, this is gonna be beautiful. That's what he was thinking.