Previous: Sexual Discipline
Next: Falling in Love



View count:84,585
Last sync:2019-12-04 15:50
If you have questions for a future Ask Lindsey episode, you can leave them in the comments section of this video or send them to me on Twitter.

Coming Out Playlist:

Dr. Doe's contact info:
Support Sexplanations by becoming a sexpla(i)naut:
Every single day I get messages on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, YouTube comments,.

YouTube email, my work email, my personal email, and in conversation about sex. That's a good thing.

It means we're all staying curious like I want us to. What's challenging about it is doing the research to check what I don't know or what I think I know. It's really hard to read about the horrible lack of information out there or how some of you have been lied to and shamed.

But ultimately it's a good thing. I feel less isolated in my own curiosity and I get to help people like you navigate sexuality more. Plus I think that as the audience, you benefit a lot from learning about what others ask, how no one has figured it all out, but we try anyway.

In that spirit, here's some more of the questions I received and some quick answers and resources for your ongoing curiosity. [WHIP CRACKING, COUGH]. Is there such a thing as having too high of a libido? Probably.

Mine is too high when I can't get work done or I'm not sleeping enough. When I stop doing the other things I love because I'd rather be fantasizing and fornicating, it's probably too high. Would you feel uncomfortable, or worry about children feeling uncomfortable, in a locker room with a trans boy?

Depends on the community that raised those children. I don't feel uncomfortable about all gender sharing locker rooms, as long as etiquette is explained and consent is understood. How should gender identity in children be handled?

With curiosity and humility. How do I deal with wanting to be attractive and found attractive while at the same time wanting to avoid the kind of socially aggressive and often uncomfortable behavior associated with being attractive? I think we're working as a society to detach being attractive or sexy from permission to make sexual advances.

It's so tough, though. Really tough! And it's going to take a lot more dialog and time to resolve.

What do you do if you're a more sexually advanced than your partner? Teach patiently, humbly learn about their unique anatomy and physiology, and take sexual workshops together where you can advance together. I want to know more about vulva, especially the inner lips.

Do they grow naturally? Or can they grow with masturbation or sex? Or do they not grow at all?

The inner lips and the vulva as a whole do grow naturally to become different shapes and sizes. Masturbation and sex can affect this, but probably not as much as you think. Can you explain open relationships, the types, ups and downs, and whether or not they are capable of working in the long run?

Open relationships typically refer to a primary intimate relationship where the people in it consent to something other than monogamy. Usually these people are having sex with other people. On the upside, you're having sex with other people, which is like having dinner with other people.

There's new energy, new personalities. On the downside, more people means more negotiation, more risk for STI transmission, etc. But they're totally workable and some people do have successful long-term open relationships.

I've recently come out as homosexual. However, I'm not sure how to go about telling my parents. How would you recommend doing it and is it entirely necessary?

I highly recommend watching the coming-out stories of other people. I've made a playlist of the coming-out stories that I like and put a link to them in the description so that you can get some ideas and feel really validated in however you choose to open up. Could masturbation mess with my period?

Yes. It can make it hurt and end it sooner. How do I talk to my parents about sex related questions, especially protection, if they avoid talking to me about sex?

Avoiding something is a form of not consenting, so I can't tell you to pursue them. I do think it's okay to tell them what you're thinking, though, like: "Parents, I have questions about sex, specifically protection. I'd like to get your feedback.

Can I ask you my questions or would you like me to check in with a clinic or friend instead?" Are there any books you recommend that are thorough, sex and body positive, and informative for us to share with our teenage children? Doing It. Laid.

Girl Sex 101. ABCs of LGBT. And I'll also write one to help you out.

Is it possible for a girl to lose her virginity if she lose her virginity if she masturbates with the dildo or vibrator and inserts it into her vagina? Virginity is an archaic concept that tries to determine a girl's or woman's value by the developmental stage of her vagina. Nothing is lost.

Look down there. Masturbate. Then look again.

Do you have any recommendations for loving, encouraging ways to have sex with men who have trouble maintaining an erection? Focus on their two biggest sex organs: their brains and their skin! You can do this by asking them what would bring them pleasure and negotiating something that works for everyone involved.

Is it possible to have an orgasm and not recognize it? Yes. And what are the signs of an approaching orgasm?

This video on the stages of arousal that I perform from a tent in a field should help, as well as this one where I pretend to be Leeloo from The Fifth Element to describe orgasm. [WHOOSHING ORGASM SOUND] Stay curious and please subscribe, share and like our videos if you do like them. It does make a difference. More people learn about healthy sexuality, people who have sex with people who have sex with people you and I care about.

There's also for cool Sexplanations perks and the Sexplanations podcast for unscripted conversations between me and people I really like.