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The Stanley Parable: Today Hank Green gets really confused playing this game!
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Game Played: http://www.stanleyparable.com/
Hello and welcome to Games With Hank. Today's unofficial sponsor is Lays Oven-Baked Barbecue-Flavored Chips. 65% less fat and only 25% less flavor!

We're back to the Stanley Parable today. Let's go play. I love this game.

All right, here I am.  Let's - let's go.

All of his coworkers were gone.

I remember that.

What did it mean?

I don't know.

Stanley decided to go to the meeting room.  Perhaps he had simply missed a memo.

Oh! Well, I - I interacted with something.
No matter how hard Stanley looked, he couldn't find a trace of his coworkers.

I remember how I can't find a trace of my coworkers.

Well, you're on too. You're off! Turn all the computers off! This one too! Off! No computers allowed.

When Stanley came to a set of two open doors, he entered the door on his left.

Let's go this way! [Enters door on the right]

This was not the correct way -

That's right.

- to the meeting room, and Stanley knew it perfectly well.

I did.

Perhaps he wanted to stop by the employee lounge first, just to admire it.

Can I get in here? I can't. I can't turn off this computer. I want to turn it off. Ah, dang it.  I haven't actually tried these doors. I assume that you can't open them, because - 

Ah, yes. Truly a room worth admiring.

Nope. Leaving it.

But eager to get back to business, -

That's right.

- Stanley took the first open door on his left.

I haven't taken that one yet.  Let's do that.

And so he detoured through the maintenance section - 

Oh!

- and walked straight ahead to the opposite door - 

No, yeah, definitely gonna go down here.
- and got back on track.

Let's go down. This looks scary. Let's do that.

I got my this working. So now I get to have - 

But Stanley didn't want to go back to the office. He wanted to wander about and get even further off track.

Yeah!

So in order to get back, he needed to go - um - er - erm - duh duh duh duh duh duh - 

You don't know where I am.

- from here, it's - um - left. 

Ooh! Oh. I just tried to open that door and it didn't do anything. Let's try these ones. Nope. Nope. Okay. Can Stanley run? Well, he can crouch.

Oh, no.

Oh!

No, it's to the right, my mistake.

Oh, are you go- are you messing with me? I'm gonna sneak - 

No, no, no, no, not the right.

No, no, no.
Why would I have ever said it was to the right?

Is it this one?
What was I thinking?

Is it this door?

It's clearly - oh dear, would you hold on for a minute, please?

No! Gah. Wha- oh. Oh, that's just papers. He's got a big - you've got a big blueprint.

Let's see, you went, um, right, left, down, left, right... yup, yup, okay, okay, yes, I've got it now.

Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right?

This story is absolutely, definitely -

Up, up... down...

- this way.

Wait a second.  Okay. There's a - there's a van. Can I get in that? 
Cause I could drive away potentially and leave this place. That would be nice. Or not.  Ooh, I'm going deeper into the bowels of the machine. Oh, I've been here before. But - 

No! No! No no no no no no no.

Oh, oh, oh, no, no.

This isn't right at all; you're not supposed to be here yet.

I've been here -

This is all a spoiler. Quick, Stanley -

Wait - 

- close your eyes.

Ugh!

Okay, okay, okay, can we just - 

I - 

- we just have to get back to, um, oh, 

I feel like I'm getting an incorrect experience because I had to start the game over.

who am I kidding?  It's all rubbish now. The whole story, completely unusable. How about, rather than waste my time trying to salvage this nonsense - 

Okay.

we'll just restart the game from the beginning. And this time, suppose we don't wander so far off track, hmm?

Okay.

Okay.  From the top.

Okay. From the top. Okay. Here I am in my office. Is there a computer in here? There is. I can't turn it off, though. We're going to the meeting room.  We're go- I always go the wrong way there.  Take me to the meeting room!

When Stanley- wait. Wait. What?

Wha- wha- huh?

No!

What?

No, I restarted, I swear, I definitely restarted the game over completely fresh! Everything should be- or did something change? Stanley - 

What?

- did you change anything when we were back in that room with all the monitors?

I don't think so.

Did you move the story somewhere or, uh - hold on. 

What?

Why am I asking you?

I don't know.

I'm the one who wrote the story.

Yeah!

It was right here just a minute ago.

You lost the story?

I'm sure it's here somewhere. Okay, then, it's an adventure.  Come, Stanley, -

Aah!

let's find the story.

There're so many doors! I have so many doors to choose from! This is new.  All the doors are open. You gu- oh, not all of them.  Not all the doors. Oh, jeez. This is a cu- oh, man, I should have been paying attention. Cause now I'm totally lost. That didn't take long. Oh, yeah, I'm totally lost.

I'll say it.  This is the worst adventure I've ever been on.  

Yeah.

I can promise you there definitely was a story here before. Do we just - do we need to restart the game again?

No, no, no, don't do it.

I find it unlikely that we'll ever progress by starting over and over again, but it's got to be better than this.

Well, I- 

Okay, let's give it a shot. Why not?

Huh- hey! I was exploring, Jeff!

All of his coworkers were gone.

All of my coworkers were gone!

What did it mean? Stanley decided to go to the meeting room.

Okay. [makes robot sounds]

Perhaps he had simply missed a memo.

Can I jump? Why can't I jump? Oh, there's no doors!

Okay, yup, it's worse. I might be remembering this wrong.

Hello...

It's possible the story is back where we just came from.

What?

Why don't we go back the other direction - 

Okay.

- and see if we missed anything.

It's all up to you, Jeff. Whee! This door is op- no, this is where I came from. Well- wait. I don't know what's going on. Hello? This is- hello? I came from that door, and- I can't go back where I ca- Jeff! Jeff, help! Help me- why is this- window look all lit up like it's outside, but in fact it's just an office on the other side? That doesn't make any sense.  So... just so ya know.  Jeff? Hello, Jeff? Oh, I could open that door. I didn't realize. Off! Computers off. 420 door. 

[sings] Take me to the river, drop me in the water, where my-

Aha!

Aha!

I knew we'd missed something. The story! Here it comes.

Oh. Ooh! Wait a second. Are you taking me around in one of these again? No? Okay. That didn't make any physical sense. This doesn't make any physical sense.

No, wait. Never mind.

Ah!

Not the story.

It does make physical sense.

Okay, let's head back the other way and retrace our steps.

Okay. Oh, that's different.  That's different! Ooh, creepo.

Now, this- well, I'll be honest, I don't recognize this place at all.  Is this the story? I don't think so.

Yeah, no, I don't think so.

I can't quite recall, but I believe my story took place in an office building.  It- is that correct? Hmm...

Hmm.

Do you remember, Stanley? 

Yes, it was an office building.

Do you know what? Since I've completely forgotten what we were supposed to be doing, how about this?

Are you broken?

You win!

I won!

Congratulations!

I won the Stanley Parable!

I know you put in a lot of hard work,-

Yay!

and it really payed off, so good job! 

Good job!

Oh, no -

No.

, no, 

No.

- I didn't feel right about this at all.

I also don't.

We both know you didn't put in any actual work for that win.

I know. I also d-

Some people win fair and square, and this was not one of those situations.

Wait a sec, can I not leave anymore?

Okay, I'm getting weirded out-

Where'd the door go?

by whatever this place is.  I don't care what might happen this time; I have to restart.

Okay, thanks, Jeff, this is fun. All right.

All right. I've got a solution. 

We're gonna follow-

This time, to make sure we don't get lost - 

I'm gonna leave it.

- I've employed the help of the Stanley Parable Adventure Line.

Okay.

Just follow the line.

Okay.

How simple is that?

This is different. This is more different. Oh, I can turn off this one now.  Turn it off. Turn, turn, a-turn it off turn turn turn it off abaggraabaara... squat- squat it down, squat squat squat squat squat squat squat. Eh-heh... I can't turn it off.  I want to turn off all computers, even ones playing weird Solitaire that doesn't make any sense.  There's not enough lines for that to be Solitaire. I'm sorry, Jeff, I really have to look around. I just can't- I can't see myself not looking around. Doot.

You see? The line knows where the story is.

Oh yeah.

It's over in this direction.

Oh.

Onward, Stanley. To destiny.

To destiny!

Oh, here's a thought. Wouldn't wherever we end up be our destination - 

Wait.

- even if there's no story there? Or, to put it another way, is the story of no destination still a story?

Well, it's the story of everyone's life.

Simply by the act of moving forward, are we implying a journey such that a destination is inevitably conjured into being via the very manifestation of the nature of life itself-

I went in a circle.

- okay, Stanley, I need to follow this train of thought for a minute, just stick with me. Now, we can both agree-

My dog is being annoying.

- that the nature of existence is in fact-

What are you doing?

a byproduct of one subjective experience of that existence.

That makes sense. Yeah.

Right? Okay. Now, if my experience-

You seem to know what you're talking about, Jeff

- of your existence rests inside of your subjective experience of this office- 

Wait. I'm going the wrong way again. I'm confused.

-, is this office in fact the skeleton of my own relative experiential mental subjective construct? Whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa, hang on.

What?

That got a bit weird back there.

It did!

Well, I'd like to apologize.

It's on the wall.

I'm not sure where I was going with all that.

Should I do a wall jump? [makes wall jumping sound effects]

You know, I think what we need right now is a bit of music to lighten the mood.

Oh, sure, that's a good-

[music starts]

[singing along] Dun, da dun da dun dah dun... yeah!

Oh! Up and over, and all around! On the walls! Question marks! And a question- oh, this one's fuzzed out. Guess it was just wiped off-

[continues singing] dah dun dah duh dah duh

Sure, okay. This one got weird. Oh, man, this place is huge. Monthly ledgers! Corporate imbalances! Financial records! Personnel files! Budgets analyses! This music makes everything good!

Wait, cut the music.

No, don't. I liked it.

Go back and look at that fern. Stanley, this fern will be very important later in the story. Make sure you study it closely and remember it carefully. You won't want to miss anything.

It's a fern. Got it. Wait, now you're making me think I don't got it. Should I take a screenshot? Okay. I can't remember anything perfectly. That was a complicated fern, Jeff.

Wait. What?

What?

We're back at the office?

No! Nooo!

No, no. Line, you do know we're looking for the Stanley Parable, right? The story?

Yeah, back this way.

Is any of this ringing a bell?

Ring some bells! [sings] Ringin' my be-e-ell.

Oh, god. Oh, god.

Oh, no, no, no, no, not again. Line, how could you have done this to us? And after we trusted you. After everything we've been through, you- oh, I can't take this anymore, I'll have to restart.

God-dang you, line! Ugh.

The Stanley Parable. That was weird.

You know what, Stanley?

Oh, okay, yes.

I say forget the adventure line. What's it ever done for us?

Uh- well-

We're intelligent people, right? Why can't we make up our own story?

Well, I don't seem to make up anything.

Something exciting, daring, mysterious. Ooh, this all sounds perfectly doable.

Doable.

Why don't we simply start wandering in- well, I don't know, how about this direction?

Okay, that's new. This direction.

Now,-

What?

-yes,-

Yes.

- this is exciting. Just me and Stanley forging a new path-

Yeah.

-, a new story. Well, it could be anything.

Are we doing this thing again? The square?

What do you want our story to be?

We're in the square.

Go wild.

This-

Use your imagination. Whatever it might be, Stanley - 

I'm thinking of fluffy pink unicorns.

I'm ready for it.

Pink fluffy unicorns, dancing on rainbows.

Oh, no, not you again.

Ugh, the line. It came in.

Stanley, I'd also like to veto the line from having any role in our awesome new story.

Well, here it is.

No lines or monitor rooms.

Having a role.

Just don't acknowledge it. We should be fine.

Okay, well. What should I name the line? Bertrand? Okay, you're Jeff and the line is Bertrand. Hello? Jeff? Bertrand? Anyone?

Ah, good choice.

Oh.

We get to make a decision.

I like those.

From here, the story is in our control.

I don't believe you.

How important we mustn't squander the opportunity. In fact, I believe I need a minute to think here. Just walk in circles for a minute. Okay.

Well, who's this?

So I know that each door has to lead somewhere, which means that somewhere the place where we're trying to go - 

Should I walk backwards?

- there must be a reverse door that leads here.

What? What?

And that in turn means that our destination corresponds with that counter-inverted reverse door's origin.

Aah.

So starting from the right, let us ask: will taking the right door lead us to where we're going?

I don't think that you can logic your way through this.

And since the answer is clearly yes, then by all accounts, the door on the right is the correct one.

Never get involved in a land war in Asia.

And now that we've figured it out: Come, Stanley! Our destiny awaits!

Uh... you sure? The Confusion Ending.

Oh, wait, what's this? Oh. Hmm.

Yeah, it's confusing.

The Confusion Ending. You're telling me that's what this is?

Yeah.

It's all one giant ending? And we're supposed to restart the game eight- eight times?!? 

[Hank laughs]

That's really how it always goes?

Wander in the blackness. Find a bookstore.

It's all - determined? So now according to the schedule, I restart again.

Bertrand.

Then what? Am I just supposed to forget?

Yeah. This is a long - this is a long one, you guys.

Well, what if I don't want to forget. My mind goes blank simply because it is written here on this- this thing. Wall.

Oh, both the - both of the doors came in here.

Well, it's insulted me.  Why don't I get to decide? Why don't I get a say in all of this?

I don't know.

Is it really - 

Hey, Lemon, don't eat that. What is that?

No, it can't be, I d- I don't want it to be, I don't want the game to keep restarting - 

My dog was eating something.

-, I don't want to forget what's going on.

Well - well -

I don't want to be trapped like this.

- have you thought about what I want, Jeff?

I won't restart the game. I won't do it, I won't do it, I won't do it.

It's going to happen right now. Whoa!

And the timer t- stopped?

Whoa.

Does that mean- um- did we do it? Did we break the cycle? The, um, whatever it is that made this schedule? How would we even know? Will someone come for us? Will something happen?

Probably. Something will happen.

Oh, okay. I guess now we just wait.

Oh.

You know, I suppose in some way that this is a kind of story, wouldn't you agree? 

Well, everything's a kind of story, Jeff.

 I'm not quite sure it contains a destination or the journey, though they're always saying that life is about the journey and not the destination, so I hope that's where we are right now. We'll find out, won't we. Eventually.

Advent- nonsense philosophy and music.

But in the meantime-

[loud beeps]

Aah! Huh. Hah. Why the noise? Okay. Was that the end of the Confusion Ending? Did I do it?

All of his coworkers were gone. What could it mean?

I don't know if it's the end of the Confusion Ending.

Stanley decided to go to the meeting room. Perhaps he had simply missed a memo.

Okay, I'm gonna get to that room, and if the doors are there and there isn't anything weird happening...

When Stanley came to a set of two open doors - 

Okay.

- he entered the door on his left.

We're going to say that that's the end of - that's the end of the Confusion Ending. I'm not sure if it is, but this is a long episode.

Thanks for watching this episode of Games With Hank. That was the Stanley Parable. Apparently, the Confusion Ending, though I'm not sure that it's over or ended. Fingers crossed. I'll see you next time. DFTBA.