LD: I'm Dr. Lindsey Doe, I'm a clinical sexologist, and I moved to Mexico because I love it here. I have spent a lot of time with this amazing woman, Olivia, and she has informed me that on March 9, 2020, there will be an enormous movement to validate women and their place in society, and so I have asked her to share, in both Spanish and English, how you can participate and what you need to know about that.

[Sexplanation intro]

Olivia: Entonces, el nueve de marzo, 2020, estamos todas las mujeres en ausencia. Vamos a estar ausentes de nuestros trabajos, ausentes de nuestras responsabilidades familiares, porque es una representación de qué pasaría si yo no llego a casa. Es una huelga pacífica, silenciosa, es una protesta. Es todas las mujeres de México negándose a operar en el mundo de México. Negándose, esto significa: cero internet, apágase el data de tu celular, no vas al trabajo, no vas a la escuela, no mandas el email que tienes que mandar, no llegas a la presentación que tienes que hacer. Como actriz, no llegas tu trabajo. Como noticiera, no llegas a trabajar. Como doctora, no llegas a tu trabajo. Realmente, es no operar, no funcionar como mujeres para hacer el simbolismo de "a ver, México. ¿Qué pasa cuando nos desaparecemos? ¿Y por qué no se nota nuestra desaparición?" Entonces ahora es pronunciar de una manera muy fuerte que se note nuestra desaparición y desaparecer un día, todas las mujeres de México.

LD: I understood some words!

Olivia: Basically, on March 9, 2020, Mexican women are supposed to protest and strike in absence, and so it is being totally absent from social media, being totally absent from your work, school, even your parenting duties. If you're a single mother, obviously that's a different story, but it is letting your husband deal with absolutely everything, letting the father, the male part of Mexico deal with the things that all women do. And not shopping, not using your cell phone. Basically, it's not about going out with your girlfriends and having coffee somewhere, it's about not spending any money.

And the statement is, what if? What if I don't come home? What happens? Why is my absence not noticed? Maybe now you'll notice my absence. Maybe now the 10 murders a day that happen in Mexico that go unresolved will be noticed. And so that's the intention of this strike. It's basically, what if I didn't come home? What if I didn't show up to work? What if I couldn't make your presentation? How long would it take you to report me missing? Because that's a big issue too.

For me, March 9th is a social advancement and I see it 30, 40 years behind US history of feminism, and I know we've still got a lot to go and we still have the Me Too movement and stuff. But the reality is that in Mexico, it's way harder to go and report a rape. It's already really hard in the States still, and it's really uncomfortable already in the States. And it's really awkward to deal with any kind of domestic violence thing. But here in Mexico, it's corrupt on another level when it comes to those reports being made and there's no comfort at all in in that process. Bribes are encouraged, corruption is encouraged, silence is encouraged.

LD: You're not gonna go to work.

Olivia: I'm not. I'm a workaholic It's gonna be really hard. But I'm gonna hang out at home with, coincidentally, a lot of women are in my household. I'm just kind of gonna work on my own arts and crafts and not get online, and I already told my flatmates that I'm going to disconnect the internet because we're not using any data that day. And we're probably - I might turn the breaker off, too, because that's part of it. It's like, don't consume any electricity if it's an all-female household.

LD: We're gonna deal!

Olivia: Yeah!

LD: Because it's important!

Olivia: It really is, and it's about, you know, those meters stopping for one day, and making those points and making it go down in history. And hopefully advances will start coming and, you know, in the States we have the ACLU, who is fighting for our rights left and right, and there's not - I mean, there's a lot of that going on in Mexico, but it's still in the baby phases of social movement.

And feminism is really behind in my opinion in Mexico, and the saddest part is that a lot of citizens here, friends of mine, aren't even aware, silenced as we are, because there's no comparison if you don't know what it is to have true freedom, right?

So we live in a little world where we're convinced that we're free. The reality is that in Mexico, you're just kind of like, well? And especially as a woman, it's just kind of like, well, you know, "calladita más bonita." That means "you're prettier when you're quiet." And it's something that is said by priests, teachers, aunts, uncles, grandparents, boyfriends, wives - whoever it is, they always say that. And that's something that, as an outspoken woman, I can always remember being told "calladita más bonita" and being like "well, there it is again." I never had that in the States. Nobody tells you you're prettier when you're quiet. People always will be like "Speak up!" That's encouraged, and so we're really behind in that part.

LD: Are you afraid of doing this interview?

Olivia: I mean, yeah. There totally is fear. I would say that, like, we just - we had a conversation of like, I'm backing out of it, like how a couple friends told me "maybe you shouldn't do it", "maybe you should cover your face", "maybe you should ask to it for it to be uploaded from a different IP address".
I mean, yeah, it's concern and somehow I always find myself in these activism-type places being outspoken, because - 

LD: You're amazing!

Olivia: Oh, thank you.
My dad has this saying, and he says "if you're not afraid, you don't understand the problem." And so, like, I understand the problem and there is fear.

I guess it's okay. I mean, being afraid is appropriate. So yeah, I mean, am I afraid of doing this interview? Yeah. Do I think there's gonna be immediate consequences? No.

LD: But you're doing it, because it's important.

Olivia: Yeah. It is important It is important. And thanks for the voice.

LD: No, it's amazing, and - 

Olivia: Or the megaphone.

LD: It's upsetting to me that that is going on. The feminist side, I think you were calling it. What's the word in Spanish?

Olivia: Feminicidio.

LD: Feminicidio.

Olivia: Which is like, it's - 

LD: Homicide of women.

Olivia: Homicide of women.

LD: And that is part of the culture here, and so women as a unified group are rebelling. In absence.

Olivia: Yes.
So this summer we had a lot of marches, a lot of protests. A lot of really crazy stuff happened during those protests with a few of the statue monuments that we have in Mexico City. And it got really ugly, but it was really weird because even my friends, instead of being like "oh, wow, here's feminism coming", you know, and knowing history and being aware that it's happened in other nations, they started calling us - oh god, it's so annoying. I get so mad about this. "Feminazis." 
Dude, it's like - they're so behind. And I guess I feel sorry for us as a group of women, and I know that there are gonna be a lot of Mexican women, pero la verdad es que yo soy mexicana, entonces a mí me toca también por decir las cosas. I'm just saying, like, I'm Mexican, I get to say this.

I guess you don't know that you're silenced unless you have something to say, and so as a woman that always has something to say, you pick up a lot on that. Like, whoa, what what do you mean?

This means frustrated in sign language, and now that I've learned that, like, this is basically the way I feel in the feminist movement in Mexico, because you're just baffled by what men that are your friends say. All of the security in the world in the middle of a conversation and you're just like, [sharp inhale]
And then you're "conflictive". So like I've always been labeled in my life here as "conflictiva". I'll challenge all those things.

The connotation that feminism has in Mexico - men have done such a good job of making it be like oh, those - it's a witch hunt.

Even when there's a conference held about feminicidios and that's the topic and the president is addressing it, there is then a conversation about how - They'll ask questions like, "Well, what about all of these women who are disappearing?" and stuff. And he's like, "Well, we have a meeting every morning from 6:00 to 7:00 AM, and we're discussing the violence in Mexico. We're discussing it as a topic."

There's hate crimes, you know, based on religion specifically. There's hate crimes in Mexico based on women specifically. That's not being looked at when you're looking at violence in general. So it's just like this - there's no advancement. There's no acknowledgment of the problem as it is. It's 30, 40 years behind.

LD: So we're doing March 9th.

Olivia: March 9th, 2020. And we'll see what happens afterwards. You know, I mean, there's a lot of women that think it's stupid. I mean, a lot of women are like "oh my god, that's so stupid. These are just a bunch of fe - feminist -"

LD: Strong independent women.
Please, let's take care of Mexico. I love it here!

Olivia: Yeah, and it's actually - there's a really good article on Forbes, the New York Times just put something out about it, so for the first time this kind of movement is getting outside press in the US, which is really really cool. And I think that that's gonna pressure our current president to address the issue on a national level. It's like, let's call it what it is. It's hate crimes towards women and it's a favoritism in the system towards men and that that needs to change.

But that's what I hope comes of it, because it's what's - I mean, you gotta acknowledge it.

LD: You kill us and you hurt us and we will be gone, and then you will see what it is like.

Olivia: Yeah.

LD: Without our loveliness.

Olivia: And if you're in Mexico and you see the social media that's coming around about this topic, it's all about - women get hurt because it's their fault is also part of it. You should be walking your friends home, you know, and you should be doing this, or like - Don't walk home alone!

So that's what the men that think they're helping and the men who think that they're part of the movement - the stuff that they're sharing, it's really telling of how behind we are, because the men who think that are supportive, for me, as a person who grew up in an already advanced feminist society mindset, because I did grow up in Mexico, but I was raised by my parents as an American. We're just stepped on so much here. We're so oppressed. It's pretty insane. "Calladitas más bonitas." That's just the - it's the meanest thing I've ever been told

LD: What's the opposite for frustration? Like when you relieve it?
Heuh! This is it! [makes downward motion with hands] Turning this into a thing now.

Okay, so. March 9th, 2020. If you can, anywhere in the world, I believe you can participate. Yeah, so stay curious. Thank you, Olivia, for all of this.

Olivia: You're welcome! Thank you, Linsdey. 

LD: Bye.