(0:00)

HANK: Hello and welcome to "Hank and Katherine and Michael Play Super Mario Brothers Wii". We're gonna go to a toad house now. 

MICHAEL: Woo. 

KATHERINE: Let's a go!

H: We're doing really well. As you have noticed. World One is pretty easy. 
K: I'm wi-- I'm losing. HAHA!
M: Do I go in here to?
K: Everyone goes in.
M: Okay.
K: Everyone.
H: No, no toads allowed. 
K: Ooh!
H: Oh, with three I don't know how.
K: How is this going to work?
H: I don't know.
M: What do I do?
H: I guess we are just gonna take turns. 
K: You just match.
H: You hit the-- the 1 button on top of a panel. 
K: Oh! I-- balls. 
H: Katherine's turn.
M: Oh, it's turns. Okay. 
K: Getting a match. 
H: And now it's your turn.
M: I'm just gonna-- I'm just gonna hit this one.
H: Yeah, nicely done.
K: That's a good one. Oh, good job.
H: Yeah.
M: Oh, I see
H: Oh, hit it.
M: I knew that one was there.
H: Aw.
K: That's okay, that's okay.
M: What does that-- what does that mean?
H: If we get-- if we match two of those black ones then-- so if we get one more then we're screwed.
K: Phssssss ah foof
H: Nice.
H: Aw.
K: Aw, Mario.
H: I'm a sorry.
All: (giggle)

(1:08)

K: Oh Mario, look what we got.
H: We got good stuff.
K: We got a-- a-- thing and a-- two of those things and none of that other thing.
H: We're doing things. 
K: Hooray!
H: I know how that works.
K: Stop trying to kick me Lemon. I let you up on the couch and now you're trying to kick me.
H: (singing) I-- 'cause I love you!
K: (giggle) I ain't trying to hear that.
(burp)
K: Stop trying to push me into stuff.
H: Ah!
K: Yeah, that's right, I pushed it and I get mushrooms. All the mushrooms, for me.
K: That is a lot of-- fireballs, you guys.
H: It's for safety.

(1:43)

M: Uhh, uhh, uhh.
K: (giggle)
H: Haven't you seen Game of Thrones?
K: Um, what?
H: Always be safe.
K: Yoshi! Hello!
M: Ah, ah, ah.
H: Get on it.
K: Get-- get on that Yoshi.
M: There's a Yoshi for everybody.
H: Get on it!
K: Get on that Yoshi! Eat everything, Yoshi!
M: But what if I wanna throw fireballs... 
H: Nice. 
K: Whatever, enjoy the Yoshis.

(2:09) 

H: Bit! Aw, I hit the bounce on the wrong thing and it was danger-- it was so bad.
K: No, Yoshi, no Yoshi! 
H + M: No, Yoshi! No!
K: Ah, which one is mine? Oh, I got mine, I got mine back. 
H: Son of a nugget, everybody.
M: How do I get on this one? 
K: Jump.
M: Oh, but I want my blue one back. 
H: I don't know how to--
M: Whatever, whatever. Oh, no--
(laughter)
H: Dammit, dammit. 
K: Okay, everybody just recognize that you got a Yoshi, and things are good.
M: Oh, they've got the same horsepower.
H: They do. Hello, bro!
K: Did I do that?
M: Why did that happen? 
K: I hope I didn't do that. 
H: I did it, I killed him, I killed him with my power.
K: Did you know you can ground-pound with Yoshi? 
H: No, I didn't. 

(3:00) 

H: Oh, you totally can-- it's cute, it's cute when he does it.
K: You just ground-pounded me. 
H: Is Yoshi a boy or a girl? 
K: It's neither. 
H: Also, is Yoshi a dinosaur? 
K: There's debate. It is a dinosaur, though, right?
H: I don't know.
M: Not sure.
H: I ate one and then I spat it out. Ah!
K: You can jump on those when you're Yoshi.
H: Oh you can? With Yoshi fingers?
K: Yoshi can walk right on it.
M: It's like piranha flower boots.
H: Oh, well why didn't Mario have some of those? Ah!
K: Oh, what was down there?
M: What was down there? I saw, I saw the blue, I don't know.
H: Oh, bubble.
M: Oh, oh, oh, what's--
K: Okay, stop doing that to me, oh my god I hate all of you.
M: I can't tell where I am.
H: Oh, we're going down with Yoshi. I didn't even know you could do that. 
M: Yeah, I'll just stand--
H: "I can't tell where I am!"
K: Hooray!
H: Good job, I didn't do that. 
K: Hooray! Yay!
(laughing)

(4:04) 

H: Yoshi!
K: I love Yoshi. 
H: Oh, more Yoshis. We don't need no stinking thing. 
K: Points! Oh god, okay. 
H: What just happened? 
K: No, Yoshi!
M: No, no!
K: No, again Yoshi! Oh, okay, phew. 
H: I ate it, everybody, I ate it. 
M: No, no, no!
H: Yes!
K: Okay, wait a second, wait a second.
H: I don't know if that's ever gonna come back or not. 
K: Wait a second, wait a second.
H: What? Oh, yes, Katherine found a hole. Yes, so smart. S-M-R-T.
M: A?
K: Nope. 
H: It's a Simpsons reference.
M: Oh, my dad didn't let me watch that show. 
H: Ah, I missed it.
K: So close. Gotta use that tongue, bud, use that tongue, buddy. Use it, get up there, there.
H: Yeah, everybody, well done, well done with teamwork and the double-teamings. Oh no, Yoshi!

(5:01)

K: No, Yoshi!

H: I like it when you, like, squack like a kitty.