Yeshmin: Hello.  I'm Yeshmin (?~0:02) here at the PAX.  You know, you gotta go somewhere. 

So we're back again with Billy Horton.

Wil: It's still Wil Wheaton.

Yeshmin: Okay.  From the Star Wars.  So--

Wil: Star Trek.

Yeshmin: --So you're also on The Big Boy Theory.  Who's--who's--

Wil: It's Big Bang Theory.

Yeshmin: Who's Big Boy and what is his theory?  You are also on (?~0:22).

Wil: Uh, Eureka.

Yeshmin: Sure.  So, why did--why did you crush Wesley?

Wil: Uh, I think you're confused, I actually played Wesley Crusher. 

Yeshmin: Right, but then, the guy that crushed Wesley.

Yeshmin: So you are, what they call in the gay community, a bear.

(?~0:39): Uhh, I probably would be.  If I were gay.

Yeshmin: Oh, oh, you're not?

(?~0:41): No.

Yeshmin: What are you doing at the gay convention?

(?~0:45): Uhhh, it's a gaming convention. 

Yeshmin: Gaming!

Yeshmin: So I understand that you recorded a record.  Uh, with the New York Giants.

Jonathan Coulton: I did, uh, it's actually They Might Be Giants.  It's a band.

Yeshmin: But where are they from?

JoCo: The--New York.  Brooklyn.

Yeshmin: Right, that's why they call them the New York Giants.  Don't correct me if I'm right about things.

JoCo: No.  You're right.  I'm sorry.

Yeshmin: What the hell is wrong with you?

JoCo: Yeah, you're right, I'm sorry. 

Yeshmin: So how was it to work with a big football team like them?

JoCo: It was fine.

Yeshmin: I had a television like this!  I had a television just like this, and it started to smile and move and dance around.  Freaked the hell out of me.  I'd wake up in the middle of the night, it'd be close to the bed, I tried throwing bread at it, it wouldn't eat. 

Yeshmin: I'm here with Ham Green. 

Hank: It's Hank.  How are you today, Yeshmin?

Yeshmin: I'm fine, Ham.

Hank: I've never--we've never met.  It's Hank.

Yeshmin: Ham.

Hank: Okay.  Ham.

Yeshmin: Were you named after the uh, the Dr. Seuss poem?

Hank: No, I was--

Yeshmin: Green, green, green Ham?

Hank: --I was named--I was named, actually, yeah.

Yeshmin: I knew him! 

Hank: Yeah?

Yeshmin: He was, he was a good poet, and a good kisser.

Hank: Yeah?  Theodore Geisel?

Yeshmin: Now, wait a minute. 

Hank: Yeah, what?

Yeshmin: Not Dr. Seuss.

Hank: Oh.

Yeshmin: Dr. (?~1:49).  She liked, uh, black men.   That's why they--that's why they called her brothers.

Yeshmin: I'm here with MC Frontal Lobe.

MC Frontalot: Frontalot.

Yeshmin: He--that's what I--that's what I said. 

MC Frontalot: You very nearly say that.

Yeshmin: So you're an MC?

MC Frontalot: I am an MC. 

Yeshmin: Okay, but do you do Bar Mitzvahs?

MC Frontalot: I have never MC'd a Bar Mitzvah, but I honestly--

Yeshmin: You should--you should do that.  There's--there's good money in that, you should do that.

MC Frontalot: I know, yeah, actually, yeah.

Yeshmin: How did you end up this way?  That's what we all wanna know.  What went wrong in your life?

(?~2:20): Um.  I was just a normal teenager until a floating head in a tube summoned me because I had so much attitude.

Yeshmin: This is exactly what I'm talking about.  How the hell did this happen to this poor guy?

Yeshmin: I remember you.  You're the pretty lady from the thing.  We were over at a thing.

Anne Wheaton: Yeah, yeah.

Yeshmin: And I interviewed you for the thing!

Anne: Yes.

Yeshmin: You remember that?  Oh, it's fun to reminisce.

Anne: It was--it was a really good time.

Yeshmin: Do you remember when we used to reminisce?  That was a long time ago.

Yeshmin: I heard some of your music, finally.  I was not impressed.

Paul and Storm: What was the album name that you listened to?

Yeshmin: It was--it was called, uh, Songs of the Humpback Whale by Pauly Shore.

Paul and Storm: That--okay, two problems.  It's--we're Paul and Storm, is number one, not Pauly Shore. 

Yeshmin: So it was a typo.

Paul and Storm: Yeah.  Or you found the wrong album.

Yeshmin: All it was was whaling calls.

Paul and Storm: I know, 'cause you bought an album that was just songs of the humpback whale, that's not our music.

Yeshmin: It didn't even have a good beat to it, I'm like, how can the kids dance to this?

Paul and Storm: I'm sure it didn't.

Yeshmin: You got something on your--you got something here.

(?~3:24): I know, it's kind of attached.

Yeshmin: I'm gonna get it for ya.

(?~3:27): Alright, there you go.

Yeshmin: No, I wouldn't do that.  I know it's attached, the kids, they do this now.

(?~3:32): It's true.

Yeshmin: They--that's what they do when they hate themselves.  It's called self-mutilation.

Yeshmin: What does this say, 'necrophiliac hip-hop'?

MC Frontalot: Um, reading's not your strong suit either.

Yeshmin: I ca--you know, I'm not good with some letters, that's all.

JoCo: Do you listen to records?  Do you listen to a lot of records?

Yeshmin: I don't--I don't got a player right now.

JoCo: No?

Yeshmin: I sold it on eBay.  I got over $16,000 for it.

JoCo: For the record player?

Yeshmin: For the record player.

JoCo: Why did somebody pay so much for it?

Yeshmin: I included a bunch of used panties.  They sell really well.

Yeshmin: Where do you learn your dance steps?

Paul and Storm: We don't really dance.

Yeshmin: That was my opinion, too, but I just was wondering where you learned 'em.

Paul and Storm: No, we--we--

Yeshmin: Don't forget to be acceptable.  That's his--that's his motto.

Hank: That's our slogan.  Yeshmin?

Yeshmin: That's what he says.

Hank: Can I have a hug? 

Yeshmin: You sure can.  Not from me, you son of a bitch!