Good morning Hank, it's Friday! Yes!

Hank can you guess why I'm doing my happy dance? It's not because I no longer have to toil under the oppressive weight of my own hair, although that is nice. And it's not because it's Friday, although I'm psyched about that too. It's because noted American nerdfighter Al Gore just won half the Nobel prize for his work on climate change. Yes! I mean Hank, if I could have picked anyone in the entire world to win the Nobel Peace Prize it would have...

Actually, actually it would have been us. It would have been you and me and we would have won it for spearheading the Nerdfighter movement that lead to the complete end of global conflict. But if I could have picked anyone else to win the Nobel Peace Prize it would have definitely been-

Actually no, that would have been Oprah. My second pick would have been Oprah. But my third pick would have totally been Al Gore. Hank, in honor of Al Gore's Nobel Peace Prize, I'm going to propose that you and I end our feud, and instead of feuding go back to the real business of Brotherhood 2.0, which is decreasing world suck. Specifically, by re-carbon neutralizing Brotherhood 2.0.

Hank, as you probably remember, way back in April when the videos had been viewed a lot fewer times than they have now, I donated $2.75 to carbonfund.org to neutralize our carbon output. But since then, our carbon output has gone up pretty considerably.

(Now Hank, remember I'm not very good at math, so I apologize in advance if I get any of this wrong.) According to YouTube, our videos have been viewed 3,030,337 times. Wow. Now Hank, I'm going to say for the sake of simplicity that our average video is about 3 minutes long. In point of fact, it's a little bit longer, but let's face it, not everybody watches to the end, so we're just going to say 3 minutes. That means that 9,091,111 minutes have been devoted watching to Brotherhood 2.0. That's more than 151,516 hours. And more than 6,313 days. Hank, I know this is hard to believe, but trust me, I'm not making it up. In total, people have spent more than 17 years watching Brotherhood 2.0.

But Hank, in fact, people have spent even more than 151,516 hours with Brotherhood 2.0 because we also have to count the amount of time they spend commenting. We've had a total of more than 17,000 comments on Brotherhood2.0.com and more than 30,000 comments on YouTube. Hank, for the sake of simplicity, I'm going to assume that it takes about one minute on average to write each comment. Now I know that it takes more than a minute to write a truly nerdfighterly comment, but it takes much less than a minute to just re-post spam (which, let's face it, comprises about thirty percent of YouTube's total commenting).

Hank, you also have to count all the action that's going on in My Pants, the Brotherhood2.com forum. Hank, there have been more than 116,000 posts in My Pants.

So if you add all that stuff up, from the commenting, and the stuff going on in My Pants, and the viewing of the actual videos, you get...uh, hold on I have to look up the number.

154,244 hours! The average computer takes about .11 kilowatts per hour to browse the internet, so that means that you have to multiply that huge number that I just mentioned times .11, which equals 16,966 kilowatts. Now, it takes an average of 1.35 lbs of carbon in the United States to make 1 kilowatt of energy. So that means I have to multiply that previous number by 1.35, which equals 22,905 lbs of carbon.

Hank, that means that Brotherhood 2.0, as a video blog, has created more carbon in the last 9 1/2 months than the average Dutch person creates in an entire year. Holy crap, Hank, we've created a carbon monster.

Man, Hank, I really wish I was one of those people who believes deep down inside their hearts that their non-sustainable lifestyle is a right and not a privileged and that therefore global warming can't exist. But I'm not one of those people, Hank, I'm a Nerdfighter, and that's why I'm spending $63 at carbonfund.org to offset Brotherhood 2.0's carbon emissions.

Hank, I'd like to thank both Al Gore and you, for helping me to understand the environmental emergency that we're all facing. I'll see you on Monday.

By the way, global warming skeptics, I have a message for you: buy beachfront property. And call me in 50 years.