LeakyCon Audience: Good morning John!!! Hank: Theoretically, a bunch of people just said good morning to you, but that has not happened to me yet because it is five in the morning, and I have to get on a plane. There was a guy, that whole time I was talking, he was very quiet... Did you know, John, that planes have a kind of a butt-hole? A majority of the exhaust on a plane comes out through the engines, but there is also a thing called the auxiliary power unit, which powers all of the electronics on the plane, like everything from the crackling speakers to the hydraulics to the vacuum-powered poop-pump-thingy. And it vents out its exhaust through a port that is called, in my head, the planus. That was the punch line. That's why I told the whole story. Yep. It's all true though. Is it weird that Jean-Luc Picard doesn't have hair? Shouldn't they have cured balding by the 24th century? Did you know that fish don't fart? Because, this might not sound that weird, but it's actually really weird. There are some fish that use gas internally as ballast. Most of them burp that up when they need to get rid of some air, but some of them do have it come out the other end. But as far as, like, bacterial gas produced in the gut of fish, it doesn't come out of them. It is produced, though, because they have the same kind of gas-producing organisms in their gut that we do. It is a mystery where that gas goes! It's a weird thing for us to not know. In addition to being exhausted, I'm also bursting with excitement internally. Super-- that's quite a dance song. Really, just quite happy that at least 55% of the Supreme Court of the United States is not crazy. It's nice to see that Canadian currency has made a bit of a comeback, and the only difference between it and American currency now, apparently, is that Canadians realized that 30 bucks and $29.95 are the same freakin' thing. And whenever you're going to Portland, everybody always says, "Don't forget your Wii!" Been dropped off at a loading dock... I don't know what I'm doing or what I should do now. I think I just met someone who's even more tired than me. It's Devon Murray! Devon: Hey, how's it going? Hank: How are you doing? Devon: Not too bad, a little worse for wear with all the flying, but kinda gettin' there. Hank: This is a terrible thing to say, but I keep expecting him to light something on fire. Tell me the story that you just told me. Devon: I just blew my microwave up the other day. I was upstairs and all the sudden -- having a shower -- I come back downstairs, there's smoke all over the house. Only a brand new microwave... So, first time being used, I should've watched it. Hank: It doesn't sound like it was your fault. Devon: Oh, no, of course it wasn't. Hank: OK. Devon: But still... [Hank laughs] Devon: Hashtag, uh, Seamus. That's it. [Cast of the Lizzie Bennet Diaries says hi to Hank] Hank: So it turns out that the cast of the Lizzie Bennet Diaries just breaks out into song pretty frequently. [Daniel Gordh and Laura Spencer break into song] Daniel: Portland! Laura: So much to do in portland Daniel: So many people I never knew in portland Laura: Portland... Hank: I'm about to go on stage with Lauren Fairweather, wearing my Lauren Fairweather shirt. Insert crowd screaming now! [Pans across excited, screaming LeakyCon audience] That's why I'm happy to get up early in the morning to do this kind of stuff because that is better than any amount of sleep possible. John, LeakyCon Audience: I'll see you on Tuesday!!! Hank: But of course, I was wrong when I said that. I won't see John on Tuesday, I will see Rosie on Tuesday. I am very tired. I am going to go to bed. Yay pillows! I'm so happy about this bed!