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Last sync:2024-05-14 14:45


Citation formatting is not guaranteed to be accurate.
MLA Full: "How to Win Australia." YouTube, uploaded by vlogbrothers, 8 September 2017,
MLA Inline: (vlogbrothers, 2017)
APA Full: vlogbrothers. (2017, September 8). How to Win Australia [Video]. YouTube.
APA Inline: (vlogbrothers, 2017)
Chicago Full: vlogbrothers, "How to Win Australia.", September 8, 2017, YouTube, 03:58,
Sorry, I have no time to write a description. *drops his VB* "TAAXXIIIII!"


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Preorder John's new book, Turtles All the Way Down, out October 10th 2017! You can find links to both the signed and unsigned editions here: and information on how to (probably) get a signed copy here:
I swear there's mountains over there somewhere. Good morning John. I'm going to Australia. Getting on the plane right now.

I'm in Denver, or as I still honestly call it, Isengard. Remeber those, John? [Music]

Airports are a really good time to, like, sit and look at people and think, "How do I feel like I know so much about that person just by glancing at them?" It feels like it takes so little data for me to put somebody in a category, and then like, I also kind of believe it, though? "Oh, that person's a student. That person's a businessperson. That's just a family with kids," but it's deeper than that, right? 'Cause like, I look at somebody and I realize, I feel like I know things about them. I know things about their politics, or I know things about how they see the world, just by, like, looking at their beard. You can't help but do that, right? At least you gotta think about the fact that you're doing it.

This is my plane. They're gonna put some food on it. Put some food on my plane, please. My auto-focus isn't working, which is really, that's not good. This was an expensive lens. I want it to not be broken. I have great news: I turned it on and turned it back off again, and it works now. It jacked itself up. Now it's up, now it's up there. I didn't expect that to happen. I mean what's in that thing, really? Except for just a bunch of pretzels. This makes me wanna play Airport Simulator.

Okay, it's 5:30, I am now playing Airport Simulator at an airport. Getting on the plane.

I'm in LA. This is what the ceiling looks like. I feel exhausted. [laugh] Oh man. And there's my gate. And there's Dave's head. Hello, Dave's head.

Hank: What's that? Oh my god, this is a beautiful shot. 

Grace: Hi, Hank! [hugs offscreen]

Hank: Grace just got really excited about the US Open. 

Grace: Look, Lindsay Davenport is so excited! She's crying! She's so happy! 

Hank: Who's Lindsay Davenport?

Grace: Lindsay Davenport is a famous, a famous like a... on the tail end of when Serena and Venus were, like, rising, she was like... 

Hank: She's a tennis player.

Grace: Tennis player, yes. That's the first thing I should have said. She's a tennis player. The American underdog won, which is, like, what I wish the story of my life was.

(Hank on a plane to Melbourne, Australia)

Getting on the plane. So the word is, stay up as late as you can, and then go to sleep and wake up and it'll be morning in Melbourne, so I'm just gonna power through. That's my plan. Everybody's asleep. They say not to go to sleep. Why are all of these people going to sleep? I guess I did have a coffee. The Earth is very big. I'm gonna work on some of my VidCon talks. I changed my mind. I'm watching One Punch Man. When I wake up, I'll be in the southern hemisphere. Is that painter's tape? Tiniest little toothpaste... Woah! I frickin' did it. I woke up a lot, but I just... just went back to bed. And when I woke up, pretty much everybody else had already woken up, so I feel like I... I win. I'm gonna have a great first day in Melbourne.

[montage of Melbourne and Hank's day]

This is my big, beautiful view of the outside of beautiful Melbourne, and there's a lot of beautiful sunlight coming through, and I got this chocolate bar... Oh no. Hello, beautiful chocolate... I'm sorry.

I just got directions to boba tea from a Crash Course fan. We'll see how this turns out. Success! Cash only... More bad news. Okay, well, tomorrow, then.

I rented a bike. This is where VidCon's gonna be tomorrow.

It's time now for something that I wanna do even though it seems a little silly. This looks like an okay spot. Southern hemisphere.

John, I'll see you on Tuesday.

[more montage of Melbourne and Hank's day]