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(All our proceeds will go to the Foundation to Decrease Worldsuck.)

In which John's mustache returns to celebrate the beginning of Pizzamas, and there is an unboxing video despite the lingering effects of a flu-like virus.

If you are confused by pizzamas, well, so am I. But here is an explanatory video Hank made a while back:

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Good morning Hank, it's Monday. I only get to say that once a year, it must be Pizzamas. Once a year, for two weeks, we make videos back and forth to each other every weekday just like it was 2007. It's the third most important holiday in Nerdfighteria. It's a celebration of love, and pizza, and most of all e-commerce. One other thing as you may be able to hear I'm sick. I have a fever, I am out of bed for the first time in four days which is good, but I'm not feeling great. Plus things are terrible, just in general. I'm sorry about how terrible things are.

This year all our profits and royalties from Pizzamas will go to the Foundation to Decrease Worldsuck and then be used as matching funds during the Project for Awesome, so you can know that your money is being used well and charitably to decrease worldsuck. What did WH Auden say, “All I have is a voice to undo the folded lie.” Well, all I have is a box full of weird Pizzamas stuff from It's time for an unboxing video.  Hold on I got open this thing.

Oh no oh, oh god Hank something terrible has happened. Something extremely terrible. You know there are some people who can pull off a mustache, and I am one of them. All right I just gotta open this box. I've got a very sophisticated box cutter, it's a, uh plug.

First, we've got this shirt from Sophia Cardone, Abstract Pizza John, oh that's very artistic! Then there's this shirt from designer Andy J Pizza, it's Mr. Potato Man Peace Sign Pizza John. Maria Nguyen designed this one, Oh my god it's epic! Oh-ho-ho this one's from David Pemberton, there's pizza in his hair. Oh my gosh guys, guys, look, at that. I… these are… I have to put all of these on. I mean why buy one when you can comfortably wear five Pizza John t-shirts at a time. Okay, I think this is our last shirt, it was designed by the folks at and it is so cool. An extremely subtle Pizza John for those of you who, you know, you're proud of Pizzamas, but not too proud.

What else do we have? We have a Pizzamas sleep mask. All of this, by the way, is only available during Pizzamas, and then it will disappear forever, Just because I'm not making the royalties doesn't mean I'm not working hard on the sales. I think I want to put on my glasses. Yeah, I think it'll look better with glasses on. Oh, that's the business. And then there is this magnificent Pizza John flag, for all of your Pizza John flag needs. I'm very excited about this year's Pizza John calendar, which contains lots of amazing Pizza artwork from Nerdfighters around the world. It's ju… it's magnificent every month. Hank, say hello to the Pizza John satin jacket. You can look like my Little League coach in 1985, made me an alternate on the all-star team. You know Farmer Jane Soap, the goat milk soap company my mom founded, oh yeah we've got Pizzamas soap, made by hand with real goat's milk in Western North Carolina. It's good soap. We also have this “Don't talk to me before I've had my pizza” Pizza John coffee mug. There's a travel pillow, and a paint-by-numbers Pizza John shirt that comes in a box with markers and you make your own dang shirt. Oh god, I love Pizzamas.

I started out this video so sad and feeling so terrible… [coughing]...I still feel terrible. So Pizzamas can't cure disease, but it can clothe you and clean you and provide you with mugs with which to drink coffee. It occurs to me that people who are new to this channel are like, what the hell is going on, and why does that guy have a mustache. I'll put an explanatory link in the doobly-doo below, where, by the way, you can also find a link to all the Pizzamas stuff available only for the next two weeks, again all proceeds go to charity. Hank, I will see you tomorrow! Yay!

Oh, Sara's home I have to go show her my mustache, it's her favorite thing!

[Sarah] – Hi… it's that time of year again huh?