Dr. Lindsey Doe: So this is Grandma Billie, my maternal grandmother. Can I ask you about sex? 

Grandma Billie: Yes, you may ask.

Dr. Doe: Okay. *laughing* And then you'll just say no if you don't want to answer a question.

Grandma Billie: Uh yeah, right.

Dr. Doe: Do you remember your sex education?

Grandma Billie: I was not given sex education, in school, for instance.

Dr. Doe: At all? They just didn't tell you anything about puberty, menstruation?

Grandma Billie: No, my mother gave me a couple of books and my father explained things and that was it.

Dr. Doe: What did  you father say?

Grandma Billie: He said the way babies are is that there's a man and a woman come together and that's it. And my mother gave me books on menstruation and I read them.

Dr. Doe: That's pretty good.

Grandma Billie: What, that I could read? or...?

Dr. Doe: *laughing* but that your parents gave you books!

Grandma Billie: Yeah, they did.

Dr. Doe: So did they explain: penetration, genitals, menstruation?

Grandma Billie: Menstruation, mostly.

Dr. Doe: Good.

Grandma Billie: Because, I was like in the fourth or fifth grade, and that was a concern for them. I grew up fast. 

Dr. Doe: Were they afraid of you having sexual relations?

Grandma Billie: No, I don't think so.

Dr. Doe: They just wanted you to know about your body.

Grandma Billie: Right. Yeah.

Dr. Doe: When did you first realize you were a sexual being?

Grandma Billie: Probably in high school?

Dr. Doe: You had a crush?

Grandma Billie: Oh yeah! More than once. A lot of them, sure.

Dr. Doe: And you were allowed to go out with boys?

Grandma Billie: Oh yeah. yeah.

Dr. Doe: So how did you decide to get married?

Grandma Billie: Well, I wasn't very smart.

Dr. Doe: *laughing* what?

Grandma Billie: I went off to college, and I had a lot of boyfriends. I was very lucky. 

Dr. Doe: All at the same time?

Grandma Billie: When I went off to college, yes.

Dr. Doe: And so what did you do with these boys? Was it romantic? Dancing? Sexual?

Grandma Billie: No, it wasn't sexual. I did my homework with them! They were smart!

Dr. Doe: *laughing* No sex before marriage?

Grandma Billie: No sex before marriage.

Dr. Doe: And so then you decided to get married.

Grandma Billie: Yeah, well that's when I met your grandfather, your Opa. I was working at a restaurant. His parents were in Europe. He came in all the time to eat, and we dated. Then he went back to school. He went back to Boston, and I stayed. You know, went back to school and continued dating and that kind of upset him, that I was dating, because you know, the ratio was great.

Dr. Doe: *laughing*

Grandma Billie: There was a lot more guys than there were girls, and so, you know, I went out, I dated a lot of guys. It was fun!

Dr. Doe: Good!

Grandma Billie: I don't know why I stopped. He was becoming... turning... 24. He was 23, and I was 19 and he - he said he wanted to get married. He didn't want to be too old when he had a family. He wanted to get married. And he was, you know, said "let's get married" and I said "well, you know, I'm having a good time!" and finally he talked me into getting married. 

Dr. Doe: So you got married.

Grandma Billie: So we got married.

Dr. Doe: And then you got to have sex.

Grandma Billie: Yes. Yes. That very night! *laughing*

Dr. Doe: Okay! And was it everything that you had hoped for? Did you even care about it?

Grandma Billie: Oh yeah! Sure!

Dr. Doe: Oh. Okay.

Grandma Billie: It was good. Yeah.

Dr. Doe: And then you had it more, because I have a mother, and uncles.

Grandma Billie: Right. Right. Yes. It wasn't just three times.

Dr. Doe: Okay. What about birth control?

Grandma Billie: Interestingly, I ... uh... like I said, I started my periods really early, and then, when I went into high school I started having horrible cramps. They put me on pills that would stop my periods, and shortly before I got married, I stopped taking those pills. And I would just... just... have horrible cramps,  but they told me I might not be able to have children. When I got married though, I got a diaphragm and we used that, but I wasn't always using it, and I wasn't as purposeful as I probably should have been, so I had my first baby and then I got pregnant again, and so I had a second one. We called the children "unexpected", "more unexpected", and then "most unexpected." And right after Keith was born, birth control came out, pills came out.

Dr. Doe: So after your third child was born, the birth control pill was on the market.

Grandma Billie: It was on the market.

Dr. Doe: And you could get it easily?

Grandma Billie: Oh yeah. Sure.

Dr. Doe: So did you have sexual conversations with your children? My mother, and uncles?

Grandma Billie: Your mother told me she knew it all *laughing*

Dr. Doe: *laughing* That sounds like her. 

Grandma Billie: So we didn't have much

Dr. Doe: So how has your sex life been? From marriage night till now, you're about to turn 80.

Grandma Billie: Fine. I mean, you know, I went through a divorce, and then remarriage, and then another divorce and another remarriage. And it was fine.

Dr. Doe: So there was some hot times in there.

Grandma Billie: Hot times. Really.

Dr. Doe: Good. Good. That's what I want to hear! Do your friends talk openly about sex with each other and you?

Grandma Billie: Not now. We talk mostly about aches and pains now. 

Dr. Doe: But when you were younger?

Grandma Billie: Some, but not a lot.

Dr. Doe: Where was your sexual information coming from?

Grandma Billie: Probably my husband and I... and I read. I actually took courses in college on sexuality because that was part of my curriculum.

Dr. Doe: So you took a human sexuality course?

Grandma Billie: I can't remember what the name of it was. It was like "Growth and Development" and it talked a lot about changes in your body and things like that.

Dr. Doe: and any talk about pleasure?

Grandma Billie: Probably not.

Dr. Doe: So someone asked me last week, What I imagined my sex life to be at 80.

Grandma Billie: Yeah?

Dr. Doe: and I said "orgasms in the garden." That I just imagine gardening and having orgasms and it being fantastic.

Grandma Billie: *laughing*

Dr. Doe: What do you imagine your sex life is going to be like, when you're 80?

Grandma Billie: Oh.... more support, and um... support of each other, and warmth and intimacy, more with conversation.

Dr. Doe: Awww! Well, do you have one really memorable experience from your sexuality that you want to share?

Grandma Billie: Early on? Later on?

Dr. Doe: At any time! In 80 years - one of your most memorable sexual experiences?

Grandma Billy: In 80 years... oh. showering together.

Dr. Doe: So any last words you would give to them - the audience - about how to have a great sex life? Or how to go through sexuality for 80 years?

Grandma Billie: I think.... uh.... listen, find each other attractive.

Dr. Doe: I like that.

Together: Stay Curious!