Dr. Lindsey Doe: This episode of Sexplanations of sponsored by adamandeve.com - a huge sex store you can access anywhere there's internet.

-- Intro Cut Scene --

Tip 1: Occupy Your Mind

If you're caught up in the taboo of touching yourself, or it's boring because you haven't gotten through the wall just before orgasm, suggestion - read French literature or Native American history textbooks like I did. Book in one hand, focusing on comprehension, just let your other hand wander and do its thing.  The first time I did this, I orgasmed a dozen or more times.

Tip 2: Edging

Also called: Orgasm control, peaking, and surfing - refers to building up arousal until just before you come, then backing off, then building up and backing off, and so on.

Tip 3: Fantasize About Yourself

Think about fucking or making love to yourself.

Tip 4: Watch Yourself Get off in a Mirror

Masturbate in front of a mirror, or under one.

Tip 5: Zebra Stripes

Another visual enhancement - zebra stripes. Take a cheap blind and position it so that light coming through the slats project stripes onto your skin.

Tip 6: Grab Your Butt

Before we were upright, walking on two legs, we had sex like dogs. So those of us taking it from behind experience pressure on the buttocks as part of sex. By mimicking this with your hand on your butt, you're giving a shout-out to the DNA memory of doing it doggy-style.

Tip 7: Tighten Your Legs

Some people can orgasm by squeezing their thighs. You might not be one of them, but the tension of those muscles can still be erotic. It's also a good way to stimulate your dangly bits (you're scrotum, you're labia.)

Tip 8: Tug on Your Dangly Bits

Another masturbation tip is to draw the scrotum and labia away from the body during arousal until orgasm when you bring them up close, just like the body tends to do naturally.

Tip 9: Intend to Get Messy

What if, instead of dreading that you get pussy or semen or whatever you ejaculate all over you, you embrace it and really go for it. Have a party with yourself! Let the metaphorical champagne and confetti get all over the place. You'll clean it up - for now, celebrate.

Tip 10: Round up Some Playthings

Whether they're pervertables like this spatula, or something refined like this fleshlight, have a little drawer or bag nearby with toys for your play date.

Tip 11: Plan Ahead for Batteries and Outlets

If your toys need batteries or electrical outlets, plan ahead. Invest in rechargeable batteries and make sure they're charged. IF you need an outlet, make sure that you arrange for it to be available, or make a little "cum cove" with a different outlet.


Tip 12: Observe Others Masturbating

It's a great way to notice patterns and know for yourself that it's normal to masturbate. There's a whole website devoted to uploading and sharing videos of masturbation called Beautiful Agony and this band, called The Sun took clips from a bunch of them so you can watch the compilation set to their song "Romantic Death."

Tip 13: Do It Without Your Hands

In those videos, you see the chest up. Backs arching, licking lips and shaking, and then there's a shot of a person running both their hands through their hair. And I can't help but laugh, because I figure they fashioned something creative to stimulate themselves hands-free. You're clever, I bet you can come up with something similar yourself!

Tip 14: Go Exploring

Another reason why your hands might not be on your genitals when you're masturbating is because they're on other erogenous zones. What does it feel like if you put a finger in your mouth, or you massage your chest? What if you clenched your toes for part of the time?

Tip 15: Put It on a Calendar

A lot of these strategies take time. It's not like going to the bathroom where you drop trou and come, it takes planning to have privacy, build anticipation, enjoy yourself and clean up afterwards.

Tip 16: Condition Yourself

Set an appointment reminder on your phone, so that when you hear that special ding, your body knows its time to warm up.

Tip 17: Taking a Shower or Bath

Another way to tell your body it's "Me time" is by taking a shower or bath. The warm water can be a stimulus, and the tub itself can be a great playground for squirting and anal play.

Tip 18: Anal Play

While you were a developing fetus, there were cells designated to become the prostate in biosex males and what we're now calling the prostate in biosex females. This organ around the urethra can be an incredible source of pleasure, and the rectum is one way to access it. You can also access it through the stomach, perineum, top of the butt crack and vagina - all of which are their own erogenous zones.

Tip 19: Rub Down with Oil or Lotion

After washing up, rub down with oil or lotion. Basically, treating your whole body like erectile tissue. It's a sensual way to connect with your largest sex organ (skin) and improve the chances of a full-body orgasm.

Tip 20: Put Underwear on or Keep it On

Being touched over a pair of panties or boxers is like being kissed on the lips before you get tongue. So much potential for things to feel exquisite because you get to crave what's next, a kind of temptation until you can't handle your own teasing anymore, and you have to tear off your clothes!

Tip 21: Undress Yourself

Tear off your clothes, all lusty like, or maintain the desire by taking off each item sensually. Trace the seams, fondle the buttons, caress the collar, slowly unbuckle... unzip... unleash. I really hope that you'll view these tips as a bucket list and go through them one by one. Especially tip 22.

Tip 22: Smell Yourself

Body odors tend to have a bad reputation. "Ripe stanky swamp balls" for example. But if you have good hygiene, there's a smell that, while potent, can also turn you on. And your body fluid, unlike a partner's, can't hurt you - just swipe and sniff. 

Tip 23: Seduce Yourself with Aphrodisiacs

Aphrodisiacs are substances found in nature thought to enhance sex. Such as: oysters, chocolate and honey. To improve masturbation, prepare yourself a nice meal of treats. Even if it's not actually a gift from Aphrodite, the energy of good food helps carry out the activity of coming.

Tip 24: Wear Yourself Out

When you go to masturbate, try doing it with the intent to be exhausted at the end. Jump around on the couch stroking, roll around on the floor humping and breathe rigorously until you've had such hot and heavy sex with yourself you have to take a nap.

Tip 25: Do Kegels

Clench the muscles that hold your genitals in place - the "pubococcygeus" or "PCs." You can do this throughout the day, just toning your loins, or you can do this wile masturbating to strengthen orgasm. 

Tip 26: Come from Multiple Directions

Serial Orgams are one after another after another. The accurate meaning of multiple orgasms is more than one orgasm at the same time. For example, you can stimulate your nipples and anus, or clit and vagina, or testicles and earlobes - or involve all your parts for that ever-so-exciting, full body orgasm.

Tip 27: Orgasm

In general, masturbation is a technique for becoming orgasmic. Can't come? Masturbate until you learn how to - then when you do masturbate, have an orgasm, or many of them, as a reward to promote future masturbation.

Tip 28: Masturbate with Somene Else

Mutual masturbation is a sexual activity where two or more people masturbate together. Either side by side, across the room, or a big circle jerk. You could be doing your thing while someone else is doing theirs, or you could be doing their thing, while someone else is doing yours.

Tip 29: Make Lots of Noise

I did a whole episode on moaning, in which I explain how moaning can make you better at sex. If you're not into the sex or masturbation, moaning like you are can get you there. Kind of "fake it till you make it."

Tip 30: Slow Down

Probably the most important - yet widely overlooked. I know how difficult it can be to take time for yourself, and when you're skilled at rubbing one out quickly, why would you spend unnecessary time naked and blissful, when there's emails to answer and calls to return. Slow down once. You can go back to high-speed sex with yourself, but try naked and blissful at least one time.

Tip 31: Breathe

I plug intentional breathing in all sexual finesse videos. It's a game changer.

Tip 32: Use Your Nondominant Hand

Maybe the most frustrating suggestion I'll offer is use your non-dominant hand. Unless you're ambidextrous, this can be very annoying. Trying to do all these special, wonderful moves with my left hand feels like trying to paint with my foot. I just want to take back control and get shit done. If you can do it though, you'll have a sexual variation that's readily accessible wherever you go.

Tip 33: Stay Curious.


Bonus Tip! Use promo code DOE when you're shopping at adamandeve.com. You'll receive 50% off an eligible item and free shipping anywhere in the US.



-- Outtakes --

Dr. Doe: Don't get weird, just do your job. *fake panting and moaning*

Matthew Gaydos (off-screen): I don't think this is going to work.