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View count:12,102
Likes:376
Dislikes:7
Comments:41
Duration:06:01
Uploaded:2016-07-22
Last sync:2018-05-06 02:10
In which we discuss renting vs owning, what to do when you move in with your partner, and which animals make the best pets!

How to Get Published video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32ZiDwbf4I8&index=51&list=PLvdeRYvP0yPWuDfZOPMorvnCB7ez69Y83
Victoria Schwab's awesome blog post: https://veschwab.wordpress.com/2016/07/15/on-the-slow-pursuit-of-overnight-success/
TRANSITIONS by William Bridges: http://amzn.to/2a2qRcr
Phil's Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/pugphilosophy

Support How to Adult on Patreon at http://www.patreon.com/howtoadult

HOW TO ADULT Posters Now Available from DFTBA Records!
http://store.dftba.com/collections/how-to-adult

Merchandise from Mike (including "Reading Changes Us" and "Everything Not Saved Will Be Lost" posters!):
http://store.dftba.com/collections/t-michael-martin

"How to Adult" is a "life skills" edutainment channel brought to you by Executive Producers Hank Green and John Green. Subscribe for new videos!

Tumblr: http://learnhowtoadult.tumblr.com
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/learnhowtoadult
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/learnhowtoadult

Created and Hosted by:
Emma Mills & T. Michael (Mike) Martin
http://www.youtube.com/elmify
http://www.youtube.com/tmikemartin
Emma and Mike are also Young Adult novelists!
Check out Mike's novels, MR. FAHRENHEIT and THE END GAMES, at all online booksellers, including
Amazon:
MR. FAHRENHEIT: http://amzn.to/1UxeENf
THE END GAMES: http://amzn.to/1MGubrw
Check out Emma's debut novel, FIRST & THEN, at all booksellers, including Amazon: http://amzn.to/1Kch7b0

Written and Directed by:
T. Michael Martin

Edited by:
Nathan Talbott
(http://www.youtube.com/nathantalbott)

Executive Producers:
Hank & John Green
http://www.youtube.com/vlogbrothers
[upbeat music]

Both: Hey!
Mike: Let's A some Q's
Emma: Several folks have asked, "How do you get published?" Well, you click on the video, right here, that we made, saying some advice on how to get published. Mike, if you could give one piece of advice to someone who is trying to get a book published, what would it be?
M: Oh, gosh.
E: One piece only.
M: Write the book you want to read, because trends come and go and you cannot predict them. As much as you might try, you cannot predict them. I would say that. 
E: Okay, nice.
M: How about you? 
E: I would say persistence is key. 
M: Yes, yeah it is. There's a really wonderful blog post by Tori Schwab,
E: I just read that!
M: Yeah. 
E: I read that earlier today. 
M: Wasn't it good?
E: Yeah! We can link that somewhere in the down below. 
M: Joesph Von Hazard asks, "Is it better to rent a house or buy for a short period?" This is a great question with a pretty clear answer. It's very difficult to imagine a scenario where buying for a short period of time is the better option. There are reasons for convenience with this, for instance, if you're renting and you want to move out, you don't have to deal with finding a realtor, or marketing the house, etc. Some people say that renting a house is just throwing away money, but in the short term renting reality is the better financial option. This is because generally speaking, it takes 5 years of home ownership before the house appreciates in value enough to cover the costs associated with buying or selling a house. So you're saving money, it's really the better option.
E: Next, Max Kats asked,"Why did you decide to start a YouTube channel? Was it because you guys wanted to help people struggling with adulthood or was it something else?" A little bit of both.
M: I remember the sequence of events.
E: Describe them for us, Mike. 
M: So the way How to Adult started, I was going to move to LA to pursue a career in filmmaking and I mentioned that to you, and you said, "Hey I've got this idea for a channel, I'm not sure what that would be, but it would be like how to do laundry, how do you get an apartment, like adulthood stuff." And you said you wanted to be like Michael Aranda, Nick Jenkins of this channel and I was like "I would love that." And so that was kinda how it started, were you struggling with some things when you came up with the initial idea?
E: I really wanted to get involved with the educational side of YouTube, that seemed to be like a burgeoning area and a lot of cool people talking about a lot of cool things. Finding ways to help people. I knew I wanted to get involved in that, I thought that this would be a helpful idea perhaps. 
M: I think there was a need for it, and at least for our community we've filled that need. Seriously, thank you so much for bringing me along for the ride. 

E: Thank you!

M: I appreciate it.  

E: High fives!  

M: Boom.  

E: supermewis asked, "Any tips for moving in with your partner?"  This can be a really exciting thing, but it also has some inherent challenges.  There are practical tips, like for instance, it's good to discuss in advance how financial obligations like rent and utilities will be divided.  Similarly, you'll want to have a conversation about housework.  Who takes out the trash?  Who cleans the bathroom, etc.  

M: That said, try as you might to avoid them, you're going to hit some bumps along the way, some quirks about your partner that might get on your nerves.  My wife likes to call these the 'Who moved my cheese?' moments, so my number one tip would be to come to the relationship with a spirit of generosity.  Give your partner the same amount of grace that you would like to receive from them.  

E: castofthoughts said, "How do I navigate this unpredictable time in my life where I don't know what my next step will be?  I feel like I'm in a limbo state waiting to hear from companies I've applied to, unsure if I will even be in the same city in three months' time.  I hate putting my life on pause while the decisions of others' greatly determines how I'll move forward.  What can I do to make sure I'm actually living in the present and not just idly wondering about the future?  How do I live in both states?"

So I think a lot of people can relate to this, and the truth is that a lot of life is out of our control.  That's no to say we shouldn't do everything we can to achieve various goals, just that it would serve us well to get comfortable with ambiguity and uncertainty.  Our advice?  Don't just wait.  Get involved in and distracted by productive projects.

M: There's a really good book about this very thing called Transitions by William Bridges, which I highly recommend.  The less time you spend ruminating, the more mentally well you'll be.  Also, on a personal note, I was recently in a situation where I was waiting to hear back from a job I really, really wanted.  I was so anxious about it that it was actually making me cry, and I was laying in bed one night and I realized, if I'm not okay with not getting this job, then if I do get it, I'm not going to be able to enjoy.  Like, all I'll feel is relieved rather than happy and excited, and so I kind of had to accept that I might not get it and when I did happily receive the job offer, I was really happy about it.

Paula den Ouden asks, "Super important question: cats or dogs?"  Well let me answer with this.  His name is Phil.  He is beloved.  His Instagram is @pugphilosophy.  'nuff said.

E: Hey buddy.  

M: I love you, too.  Thank you.  

E: (?~5:22)  Oh, he's so cute.  That's all we've got for you today.  Thank you so much for your questions and for watching.  In the meantime, Phil, what's the catchphrase?    (?~5:39)