Forget it. I'm not even going to do this video. No-ones going to get it right. Holy cr...! Take it from this sharp dressed man, you are right. As a reward here's a dinosaur. Look at the T. rex, look at the T. rex, look at the T. rex. Oh, and just an FYI, Sharp Dressed Man is a ZZ Top song, that's why I said that earlier. (Coughs) Explaining jokes, a sign of good comedy. It hardly seems possible bit Frank Beard, who sports a moustache, is the only member of ZZ Top who does not sport a waist-length beard.

Left: Round five

Right: Oh, you got salsa on my hands.

Hmm, round five got darker. Maybe it's because the facts are darker.

Fact one: After death a man's beard can continue to grow for up to three months.

OR

Fact two: For more than a millennium, kings and even queens of ancient Egypt wore false beards made of precious metals tied to their heads to show their godliness.

OK, the second fact isn't dark at all. Which one's it gonna be? Is it gonna be the death fact or is it gonna be the Egypt fact. You know what? I'll give you a lifeline. If you click on my beard, you can ask it advice. I'll just play dead, here. I'm a trained actor. Am I breathing too much? I don't think so. I think I'm doing OK. You decide yet or are you going to ask my beard? You can ask my beard.