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In which John finds an office.
Hello, my name is John Green, and I do not shoot first. I play pacifist Fortnite. It's a hot new game that everybody's trying, in which you play Fortnite but not to try to kill everyone, instead to try to survive and assume the best of other people.

I mean, is it not possible that all of us could just stand up to Epic Games all at once and say no more. No more will we continue to shoot each other and hit each other's forts down and hurt each other and harm each other. We're gonna be like the beautiful butterflies, we're gonna be... let me practice my bush-hiding. There, that's the business Meredith, that looks good.

Guys today I do not have my child labor, Jacob and Noah Carol, I'm very nervous, I don't know how to look at the map without them. That's not it. Is it this button? It is, okay. So we're coming in there, I'm very nervous about trying to do this without Jacob and Noah, but the reason I'm gonna try to do my best is because they're not here, and I just, I need to believe in myself, you know? I need to believe that I can find a way to do this.

I think I'm gonna go, I kinda want to go to Risky Hills, but maybe I should go to Junk Junction, I've had a good run in Junk Junction. Alright so I'm gonna go to Junk Junction I think. And to do that I'm gonna wait as long as possible, and then I'm gonna jump. 'Kay, going to Junk Junction Meredith. Oh there's a soccer field over there, that looks pretty good. But we're not going there we're going to Junk Junction. We're gonna get as far away from the action as we can, and then we're just gonna creep our way back in.

Alright. So here's the deal. I'm trying to win Fortnite without firing a shot. I've talked to Jacob and Noah-- Uh oh, uh oh where is he, where is that guy going? Are you going to Junk Junction? If you're going I won't. Looks like he's going to Junk Junction Meredith. Doesn't it look like he's going to Junk Junction? He is. Okay, we're not going to Junk Junction. Cancel, cancel the Junk Junction.

I saw a chest. Where was the chest that I saw? Alright, we're going in soccer field. I don't know why, it's not really where I wanted to go. I should have Jacob and Noah with me. I'm not good enough without them. Okay I have a shotgun, I have to hit X. I have a shotgun, I have a shotgun loaded. I don't want to fire it though.