Hank: Hello and welcome to Dear Hank and John. 

Charlotte: Or as we like to call it, Dear Charlie and Jimmy and Hank. 

Hank: This is the weekly podcast where I, Hank Green, and usually John Green, but this week Charlie McDonnell and Jimmy Hill answer your questions, give you dubious advice, and bring you all the week's news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon. But first, does Jimmy have a poem for us?

Jimmy: Oh yeah, Hank. I've got a poem, alright. Are we gonna split it?

Charlotte: Yeah, we're gonna do a line each. Oh.

Jimmy: We're gonna read it together.

Charlotte: Do you wanna start, Jimmy?

Jimmy: Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids.

Charlotte: In fact, it's cold as hell.

Jimmy: And there's no one there to raise them if you did.

Charlotte: And all this science I don't understand.

Jimmy: It's just my job five days a week.

Charlotte: A rocket man, a rocket man.

Jimmy: And I think it's gonna be a long, long time.

Hank: Thanks for that lovely poem.

Jimmy: The beautiful lyrics of Bernie Taupin there.

Hank: He is very prolific.

Jimmy: Why is this guy building rockets saying he doesn't know anything about science for? Surely that's kind of a fundamental thing on your CV. if your job is to create spacecraft.

Hank: Well, I don't think his job is to create spacecraft. I think his job is just to sit in the spacecraft. But it has always seemed kind of odd to me that it's just his job five days a week and now they're sending him to Mars? Because that's going to take a lot.

You can't come home on the weekends. Joachim Moczko. So, for everybody who doesn't know, Charlie and Jimmy have both been making YouTube videos for a long time.

When did you guys start each?

Jimmy: Oh wow, I started back in 2007 I think, late 2007.

Charlotte: Yeah, same, well I was April 2007, I think that was May.

Hank: Alright, that was January 2007, so we're all pretty old school here. And you guys we are now all three of us working together on a show, but you are the hosts of it. I'm only very behind the scenes behind the behind the scenes Called serial time which happens every morning. What's it?

What's up with serial time? Are you at the serial time studios now? We are absolutely.

Charlotte: we're recording with a very fancy microphones We use on serial time.

Jimmy: and just to say Hank you are always with us in spirit. You know, you might not be with us in the studio, but you're constantly in our minds and in our heart whenever we record.

Charlotte: We have a picture of you just above the lens of the camera, so that we can always look at you and be reminded where the money came from. 

Hank: That's not a real thing, is it?

Charlotte: No, but we might do that now, now that I've said it.

Hank: Okay, do it now. I'm going to come to England sometime in the next year and I'm going to be on Serial Time and I want to see myself above the camera lens.

Jimmy: Okay, sure. We'll get like a huge six-foot oil painting commissioned. with eyes that follow you around the room. But no, yeah, serial time's great. So it's a daily morning show, sort of waking up YouTube like a fun alarm clock.

Hank: Waking up the British YouTube because in America it comes out at like midnight and I'm like, oh, there it is, morning in England.

Jimmy: Yeah, every episode we do, we get at least five or six comments on the timezone, even now, even though we've been doing it like two months.

Hank: Yeah, it's like, is that morning? Shut up, you guys. 

Charlotte: We'll get it eventually. It's fine.

Hank: Yeah, well, actually I... I am tempted to leave that comment, and I have seen that comment, and also know that this is a thing that happens every single video, and yet when I see an episode of Serial Time come online and you tweet, good morning everyone, and I'm about to go to bed, I am tempted to leave that comment. It's just a thing that people want to do. It's just how we operate.

Charlotte: I did see you leave a comment on one of the recent Serial Times saying good morning, and it's only just struck me that that must have been a very hard thing for you to have done. So, good job.

Hank: Well, everyone else was saying it.

Charlotte: Yeah. My mom always says it. Every single episode she leaves a comment saying good morning.

Jimmy: Oh, I love that.

Hank: All right. Well, I'm loving serial time. It's really fun and and and hilarious and and weird and cute. So good job, guys.

And now we're going to ask us some questions. You. guys want to answer some questions?

Jimmy: Oh, yeah.

Charlotte: I wasn't told about this. 

Jimmy: Charlie Refuses to Answer Questions. 

Hank: Well, luckily I did that, but just because I was super feeling awkward.

Jimmy: There's nothing worse than an awkward curtsy, is there? It's an awkward movement at the best of times.

Charlotte: I appreciated it all the same. Did you actually curtsy when we met? I can't remember.

Hank: No, I made that up. I mean, it's possible. I do sometimes curtsy. I think that it's kind of awesome.

I like the curtsy as an introduction. I think that it is an interesting body movement that is somewhat complicated in its control of all of your body parts, and so I find it to be more visually pleasing than a bow or a handshake.

Jimmy: Yeah, do you think that's where it evolved from? Do you think it's just essentially a fancy bow? I'd be quite interested to hear the history of the curtsy. 

Charlotte: Haley asks Dear Charlie and Jimmy and Hank How do you avoid being pretentious when you're intelligent? This is a really hard one.

Hank: Well, I first want to say that pretentious might not have the exact definition that you think. Pretentious. is like trying to look important or trying to look intelligent and often more intelligent or important than you actually are. So how do you avoid looking pretentious while you're intelligent? Maybe is both the question you wanted to ask and also a really good way of illustrating how to look pretentious, which is what I just did by correcting your grammar on that question.

Jimmy: Yeah, I mean, so pretentious is kind of the same. It's like having a delusion of grandeur, isn't it? So I'd say if you are And if you're genuinely quite knowledgeable about a topic and you're speaking about it sincerely and passionately, no one will ever see that as pretentious because it's coming from an honest place. You'll only come across as pretentious if you're trying to make out that you're cleverer than you actually are.

Like you're just trying to sound smart for the sake of sounding smart when actually you don't know what you're talking about.

Charlotte: Well, I don't know that I agree. I feel like you can sometimes be honestly smart, like just really, really smart and then other people can see you. And if they don't know what you're saying. Thanks. for watching!

I always try and slip like a vibe of that into whenever I'm putting across a fact like here's something that I found out kind of separate it from me.

Jimmy: Yeah and I think um there's just a case of. it's a case of being aware if somebody maybe isn't following you if you're trying to explain something. so if somebody seems like they're a little bit lost when you're chatting about something that you happen to know a lot about just just be aware of that and explain things. In a slightly simpler or more accessible way.

Hank: and also also be aware of the fact that People might not care about the thing that you're excited about and so they might be think that you're pretentious because you continually you know like are really excited about things that you're really excited about and They're like why does he keep or why does this person? I've obviously just projected this onto myself. Why does this person continually try and make themselves look so smart? Because they just might have different interests than you.

And that's a whole different kind of intelligence where you're looking at a person and. you're saying, you know, like, what is this person, like, what are they into? And how do I, you know, interact with them in a way that will make them excited to Be my friend and be talking to me. And also, how do I make this information sort of more interesting to them?

Like, how do I put myself in their shoes and say, like, how is this topic going to be? Because everybody, you know, everybody is going to... Get excited about things for different reasons. so maybe you know think about that.

I have this problem though and and sometimes people will Say things to me, and I have this awful habit of saying do you actually want to know? Because which is which is a really pretentious thing to say, but it's like. it's my honest response. like people are like God Why don't we have wireless chargers yet? Why do we have to have all these cords all around all the time, and I'm like well There's an answer to that question And we'll see you next time.

And...

Charlotte: Well, how do you think you could phrase that better, then, to be less pretentious? Or should you just not say that at all?

Hank: I think I should just not bring it up. I think when I know the answer to a question that people are asking rhetorically, I think I should just be like, they are not actually interested in this. But then sometimes I'm like, well, they keep asking about it. Are they?

Do they want to know? Should I launch into a five minute monologue on, you know... 

Jimmy: And now Dear Jimmy, Charlie and Hank, What are your opinions on school uniform On school uniforms and clothing restrictions in non-uniform schools. Wow.

Hank: Yeah, I went to a school that had very few clothing restrictions, though I'm sure that there were plenty and I'm sure that they mostly restricted the clothes of females because that's how it goes. I can't distract the boys. But yeah, my... Did you guys have school uniforms?

Jimmy: Yeah, when I was younger I can remember watching American teen movies and always being baffled by this idea that in America you can go to school wearing trainers and jeans.

Charlotte: And really jealous. Yeah, I had school uniforms as well. I also went to an all-boys school, so I didn't ever. experience any kind of like restrictions that were put on girls. It was just restrictions on dudes.

Yeah. Did you have like a smart uniform, Jimmy?

Jimmy: Yeah, it was quite smart. We wore a tie. In fact, I think the last time I wore a tie in life was because I had to at school. That's the only time it's ever happened.

But I quite liked it because it meant that you never had to think about what you wanted to wear for school. And everyone was kind of on the same level. Like, I think the reason the uniform thing is a thing in the UK is because it's supposedly It gets rid of any class barriers because like everyone's dressed the same. like you can't tell which kids are less well off than other kids which I quite like because it was always quite stressful when we had non-uniform days and you had to think of something cool to wear to school because there's a huge deal around it. so we'd maybe have one day of the year where for charity you could come into school like wearing your cool sports top or a baseball cap yeah and.

I always found that quite stressful. I don't know what to wear. I need to make a good impression.

Oh God.

Charlotte: I feel like, and I think this is just, this comes from like, if you go to school every day wearing a uniform, the one day of the year where you don't have to do that kind of becomes like you want to treat it like it's a free day because you're kind of used to wearing those clothes on the weekends. So I feel like less work happens, like less work tends to happen on those days where you can just wear whatever you want. But I assume that if you do wear whatever you want every single day of the week, that that doesn't happen. That's my guess anyway.

Jimmy: So what are these clothing restrictions then? What are you not allowed to wear within the realm of non-school uniform?

Hank: Well, when you can wear anything, there are things you can't wear. You can't have curse words or references to drugs on your clothes. There's a limit to the length or the shortness of shorts and skirts oftentimes. It has to be a certain distance from the knee.

And there is also sometimes restrictions on the depth of the cut of the neck.

Jimmy: Oh, wow.

Hank: It's the way that our school administrator would say that. And yeah.

Jimmy: Wait, so is there a teacher wondering around with a ruler then and just making sure that the come here. No, that's a centimeter out. Go home. Wow.

Hank: Yeah, I mean, the To me, I am in favor of allowing people to express themselves and create their identities in whatever ways they can. That doesn't seem to be a negative thing to allow people to do. But I do totally understand where you guys are coming from, where you sort of erase that very common and very difficult to ignore class Dostoevsky. 

Charlotte: Thanks for watching! 

Jimmy: Oh yeah, I remember that. There was a whole like load of etiquette around how you wear your school uniform at my school. So we had a shirt and a tie and then a jumper over the shirt. And if you had the collars of your shirt over your jumper, that was like a signifier that you were a massive nerd.

Like that was the thing that you didn't want to do. You'd get completely ripped. apart for that. So it's funny how even within a uniform, like kids still find ways of kind of not only expressing yourself, but putting like Cool signifiers in there, for want of a better phrase.

Hank: Well, Eileen, I think that what we've got for you is basically stories about our schoolhood and very few actual opinions. Because maybe this isn't a topic that super matters a ton when it comes to uniforms, though I do feel like clothing restrictions when it comes to that seem to out... Abnormally weigh upon the females of the world, which seems a little bit odd to me. So maybe school uniforms are a good way to just avoid that particular problem and say, everybody wear this, let's not talk about anything else.

Jimmy: Yeah.

Hank: It's my turn. We have a question from Courtney who says, Dear Hank and Charlie and Jimmy, This upcoming presidential election will be my first time able to vote for a president. It is both exciting and daunting. I think that I have a general idea of who I might vote for, but I was wondering if there was any way to keep abreast on the presidential candidates.

Jimmy: Oh wow.

Hank: You guys aren't American, but you are a politically active British people.

Charlotte: Oh yeah, we have politics here.

Jimmy: Yeah, we had a very exciting election a few months ago.

Charlotte: Yeah, was it exciting? I found it quite depressing personally.

Jimmy: Yeah, I mean the result was depressing but the lead up to it, there was some excitement there. I think there was a lot of optimism like, oh maybe this is the time it will change. Like maybe the good guys will win.

Charlotte: And it did change, it got worse.

Jimmy: Yeah, it got a lot worse. It got a lot, lot worse. So we now don't have an NHS. Sorry about that.

And we've decided to get rid of school. We don't have school anymore.

Charlotte: And bring back killing foxes, everyone.

Jimmy: Oh, yeah, and we can now kill foxes. So it's really great. It's a really brilliant place to live. I don't understand the US election system particularly, so...

Hank: Oh, yeah, it's very strange. It's very... we got a whole bunch of weirdness in our election system, but I think that... It's the first time you vote the first time you're getting into this. It's definitely daunting task to be like. okay.

Here are all the issues. There's like 85 things I'm supposed to care about and I'm gonna have an opinion on all of them So I better get one quick. and that's terrifying like why and that's I think a lot of people don't a lot of young people like their first elections they might not vote just because like they haven't had time to like deal with that and internalize all of their opinions about these things and because they have to you know make ends meet and and you know buy Gatorade and

Charlotte: ramen noodles.

Hank: so the There are places, though, there's this website called, I think it's called isidewith.com, which sort of walks you through all of the issues that it's like, what do you think about gun control? What do you think about bombing other countries? What do you think about healthcare? And sort of just based on who you are and what you think, it will then, like, not only, it walks you a little bit through the issues themselves and, like, the different perspectives people have on them.

And then it tells you who you are most aligned with politically in terms of. the current field of presidential candidates, which I did and found very accurate.

Jimmy: That's really cool. That sounds really, really great. I think there's a similar app for UK stuff as well, which I used this year, and it works pretty well. But I guess it's just like sort of learning about any new.

What do you think about Twitter?

Charlotte: Yeah on that point of just feeling like you you feel like you have to care about absolutely everything all of a sudden. when I first started like when I was it was my first time to vote. what I did do is I just like look to see what the things were that were most important to me and that was kind of. that's what I use as my kind of benchmark for the figuring out the kind of parties that I might be interested in.

Jimmy: But I mean that in itself is quite hard isn't it? The New York Times New York Times Yeah, and just don't vote for one of the bad ones.

Charlotte: Yeah, just make sure you don't ruin your country.

Jimmy: Yeah, it's as simple as that, really.

Hank: Wow, that was fantastic advice. I think you. guys are better at this than me and John are, and you should take over the show and have your own. Maybe you should do this every morning, five days a week.

Jimmy: What, Charlie and Jimmy's political bit, where we just say don't vote for the bad guy?

Hank: No, no, just talking. Generally talking together like I think every morning Like you should. just you guys should just talk about stuff.

Charlotte: I think you might have already had that idea.

Hank: Hank Jimmy Do you want to do another question?

Jimmy: Yeah, I think it's your turn though, isn't it Charlie?

Charlotte: It is my turn.

Jimmy: I mean I can read one out.

Hank: Oh, I'm sorry. God kids. How do I keep track? You're both British.

I can't.

Charlotte: how do you know you didn't tell I really hope that for Non-british viewers that you will be able to tell me and Jimmy apart I think we have pretty distinctive voices, but you do have very okay. good Lily, Dear Charlie and Jimmy and Hank, That wasn't a fart, but as soon as you say that wasn't a fart, everyone's like, it was a fart, wasn't it?

Jimmy: Lily's stomach is making fart noises, essentially.

Hank: That's what we need to deal with. She wants to know what to do about it.

Jimmy: I would say seek medical advice. Oh no, no! No, no, it's fine. Do you know what?

I've actually got experience of this. I was once filming for a TV show and I had a microphone on under my shirt, a little lapel microphone, and I wasn't feeling great that day. I think maybe I'd had quite a late night.

And my stomach was doing things I didn't want it to be doing the next day. And apparently this was very audible on the microphone, which was under my shirt. So embarrassingly in front of a whole crew, a whole room full of people, proper professional people with cameras and lights had to stop filming until my stomach stopped making these noises because it was ruining the filming.

It was so embarrassing. So I totally feel your pain Lily and you kind of just have to laugh it off like any embarrassing thing.

Hank: Yeah. Yeah, the trick to dealing with embarrassment is self-confidence, which is a trait that is entirely impossible to acquire, as far as I can tell.

Charlotte: Oh no, come on. You. can acquire it. It's fake it till you make it, isn't it? That's what I've been trying to do, that you just try and pretend you just act like a confident person, and then eventually you start being a more confident person.

That's always been my technique. That does. I definitely agree, it's just...

You just say... Really, you just sort of have to try and figure out how to not care about it as much and to get that across to people.

Jimmy: Turn it into a joke. Say, guys, it's just my stomach. I haven't farted, but I have pooped myself, so I'm going to have to leave. And then, you know, I think that also out who your real friends are as well.

Hank: No, you got to say, look, I ate... Demon, and I was helping my family, it was living in the house, there's only one way to kill it, and it was to eat it alive. It was a very small demon, about the size of a coin, and I just took it with water, and now it's in there, it's doing its thing, but you know, I've... I'm gonna, it's digesting away and it won't. be a problem tomorrow.

My bigger problem personally is sometimes I really have to fart in public and like, it's just not gonna not happen. And so even sometimes you have to be like, look, you know, I have to be like that old guy who just doesn't care anymore.

Charlotte: And it's just like, and then that's, do you know?

Jimmy: Lili Alright, so Katherine asks, she says Dear Jimmy, Charlie and Hank, I'm coming up on the one year anniversary of starting my first full time job. I'm enjoying it and have learned a ton so far and am planning to stay for a while longer but also trying to think proactively about my future. Do you have any advice for developing an early career, making adult decisions about when and where to move or how to go about looking for new opportunities? I'm also curious on how one decides when to go back to school and get a grad degree.

Wow, there's a lot in there, Katherine. I mean, that's life, isn't it? That is life in a question.

It's hard.

Hank: How do you make decisions about big important things?

Charlotte: It's really really hard and I feel like I. haven't. I feel like I haven't lived a lot of this stuff myself Like I came straight out of school went into making YouTube videos never had to think about getting a graduate's degree Never had to. yeah I just I I feel like I have to sit this one out because I I would be having more trouble than you are Katherine. right now.

Jimmy: I think yeah I can. I can totally see how it's really easy to get trapped in full-time employment because when somebody starts paying you money The money thing is nice. If you have

Hank: a job that doesn't look to you like this job is going to lead to better jobs within the same company or you continuing to develop your skills and continuing to do different cool things that excite or interest you, then You probably do want to be looking around at least semi-actively at like things that your friends are doing, things that if you've been through college already, things that you are, you know, people who graduated around the same time as you are doing. And yeah, and being open to that. There's nothing wrong with looking for other jobs if. you, you know, while you have a job. That is a totally normal thing and you shouldn't be devoting like tons and tons of time to that just because you probably don't have that time to devote and you should also have a life and enjoy things.

But yeah, I think it's totally normal and I expect, you know, when I have employees that I feel like they are being underutilized, I expect them to be looking for other jobs. And also as an employer, I think that It's my responsibility to make sure that they aren't being underutilized at the company. so if I have an opportunity for them to advance and to be doing something more interesting than their current job then I feel like that's my responsibility and if I don't do that then I should expect that they will eventually leave. and that's one reason why I You know, when I when I look at the people I've got working for me, I'm like, I need to make sure that this person in particular, we find something for them that's more interesting or less awful than their current job. And then they will not leave and. go away and not be working for me anymore.

So, you know, I think that there's a lot to be said for being really good at the job you're at in right now, because that will affect, you know, you like you, you will get better. I think that that Has in my life at least led to more personal satisfaction. when I'm not thinking about it as just a paycheck I'm actually thinking about it as like. this is part of my life And I'm spending a lot of time doing this show. I should be doing it But you know I should be believing it and doing the best job I can even if it's not a job that I particularly love or I think will lead me to my ultimate dream.

I think that you know working hard at whatever job you have does kind of lead you toward your ultimate dream because it Exemplifies your work ethic and how you approach life. So yeah, I've had good luck with just working hard, even if I don't really like my job.

Jimmy: Yeah, and I think, you know, when you reach that point where you not only don't. like a job, but maybe even if you do like a job, but feel you're not really getting anything out of it, then maybe that's a clue that it's time to move on. Yeah. If you're not getting anything out of this anymore, if you're not developing with it, then what's the point?

Hank: Yeah, and you can absolutely, I encourage you to talk to your supervisory manager, your boss about that because when I have, I always, I like that. when people come to me and they say like, look, I feel like I could be doing more interesting things and here are some of the more interesting things I think I could be doing. You know, I often agree with them, and I'm like, hey, yeah, good ideas, because I can't have all the ideas.

Jimmy: It's quite a hard one to answer, though, without knowing what Katherine's job is. Like, she could have an amazing job. She could be a millionaire. She could be, like, some high-flying exec who gets to jet around the world.

We just don't know.

Hank: Yeah, I mean, I'm trying to answer this question in a way that works for both someone who works at. a fast food restaurant and someone who works in investment banking. Right, it's my turn again. This question is from Daniel, who says, Dear Hank and Charlie and Jimmy, Do you think science slash scientific thinking can determine right from wrong? Are there objective ways to measure morality?

Well, that's another big one. Oh, wow.

Jimmy: Can we go back to the fart ones? This is too hard.

Charlotte: What do you think, Hank? This is a really tricky one.

Hank: No, I don't think that there are objective ways to measure morality. I don't like... Kant had his idea of the categorical imperative, which was like, this is the way to create a universal morality. And the way to create the universal morality was, you know, you should behave in a way that you think if everyone behaved in the same way as me, then The World Would Work Really Well.

But That Doesn't Work Because Not Everyone Will Behave The Same Way As You And People And Different Cultures Believe And Act In Different Ways. And That Has To Be Okay Because Otherwise If We Are You Know Like The One Thing That That Breeds Is Intolerance And Then Saying Like. Look The Way That You Guys Live Your Lives Thinking about it.

Charlotte: I feel like there maybe is a way to objectively measure morality without having that kind of like absolute morality I guess because I feel like in that case isn't morality. it's ultimately what people perceive morality to be. so maybe if there was a way where you could kind of speak to every single individual on the planet and ask them every question every big important question every small question related to morality and ask them what their opinion was then you could come up with a percentage. maybe that said you know. uh trying to think of something like um petting a dog is 99 moral according to the human race.

Jimmy: that's the example.

Charlotte: that's the best i can come up with. does that sound feasible or is that just? i'm just trying to figure out a way to answer this question where i can say yes somehow and that was my best.

Hank: the uh so the. There's two different things. There's allowing every person to define their own morality, which I think you have to do to a small extent. But then there's the larger. version of allowing a culture to define its morality.

And I think that that is a thing. Like you can say like, you know, there is a structure that We define as humans. it is the thing that we call culture and it is different for different people and we there is definitely I think there are ways to evolve that and to make that you know. more tolerant is the thing that I tend to want cultures to be but in terms of the nitty-gritty specific details like petting a dog versus And there's even weird gray area with something as seemingly unobjective. Or is it seemingly as objective as like murder, where you have some cultures that are like, yeah, like an America where it's okay to kill people as long as the government has gone through a lengthy and expensive process to say that, yes, we should kill this person because they did something very bad.

And in some countries that and in fact, in my own personal morality, I think that that is that is wrong. And then you have war, which is just like, how do we rationalize this? But we seem to.

Jimmy: I mean, morality in general is such a difficult thing to rationalize. And I think it'd be impossible to ever reach a full consensus with it. Because you've got, you know, literally hundreds of thousands of years of history that has kind of shaped our morality and the human condition. I mean, that's what it comes down to, isn't it?

It's a human thing. And I think it's what, you know, if we could reach a full consensus, We'd become a bit more robotic as a society. Yeah.

Hank: And I like the idea that we change and we evolve and hopefully we head in good directions. And I think there's also a thing here that is the desire to scientifically be able to say everything. And there are just some things that we cannot scientifically talk about. Like there are some questions that science isn't supposed to answer.

Science isn't designed to answer. Things like, what is the difference between right and wrong? uh which you know i think that's that's a human question that that every every human has to decide and then collectively a culture decides and then collectively the cultures join together and decide for the world and you. know i think that greater stability will be had if if we have some standardization there and that standardization involves tolerance of other cultures and other people. uh that's yeah.

Charlotte: and but like Dear Charlie and Hank and Jimmy, what were your best and worst subjects when you were in high school? 

Jimmy: You're into art. Yeah, I was into art. I've kind of blocked the whole of school out. I actually really enjoy it, so I've decided to forget about it.

Hank: I mean, I put this question in the notes, and I can't really remember... Like, why aren't my report cards searchable on Google so I could look this up?

Jimmy: Oh god, imagine. I don't want my report cards out there. I remember that I was terrible at sport. Paul Edmondson Cold, wet, grey days on a frozen rugby field having a ball thrown at me.

Charlotte: I did that terrible thing where as soon as I realised I wasn't amazing at it, I pretty much gave up. When I first went to secondary school, I was like, yeah, I'm going to do sport and it's going to be great. And I tried to play rugby and I tried out for. the team and I got in the second team. So I didn't get in the first team.

And then I was like, yeah. And then I just never was interested in sports again.

Jimmy: That makes a lot of sense. Since I've got to know you better through working on Serial Time quite closely, like we hang out like at least two or three times a week. You're actually secretly quite competitive.

Charlotte: Oh, I'm very. Well, it's not a secret anymore. But yeah, I am out there. I am competitive.

I just don't like to make a point of it. I don't like to make a point of it when we're actually competing. Yeah.

Jimmy: And it's not in a horrible way. Like it's not in a really gross like kind of soccer mom type way. It's like it's just it's something that's there. I just like winning.

Charlotte: And I think what it is is I just find myself getting really embarrassed when I lose. That's that's really what it is.

Jimmy: OK. were you kind of the kid who if he was losing the race would just throw themselves down and like pretend to have a knee injury?

Charlotte: um i'm usually like. it still happens right now like if i try and play a board game with people and i'm on like a team and i can't write quite figure out the answer to give the like playing Pictionary and it's not quite going well. i would just be like mortified like so horribly embarrassed. i will just like not have a good time at all. um So that's me. 

Jimmy: Inside, Charlie McDonnell.

Charlotte: I liked art, I didn't like PE. That sounds about right, really. 

Jimmy: Sorry, go on, Hank.

Hank: I can't remember. I definitely did well. Well, no, I was good at memorizing stuff, which was most of American education. So I feel like I did well in most things.

I didn't really ever get a C until college, but I do remember that I almost failed a class in landscape design, so like the placing of plants around a yard for the beautification of a home or a business. And I almost failed that class because I skipped it too many times, but I had to freak out. And I screamed and I kicked.

I stormed out of the classroom and I beat up a locker. And then the teacher was. like, maybe we'll take a couple of these absentees off of your record. I'll just let you have the B.

So yeah, I almost failed that class. But I freaked out and it saved me.

Jimmy: I would love to see you two play a board game together. That would be incredible. I think that there would certainly be tears, possibly violence.

Charlotte: Have we not done that, Hank?

Hank: I don't think we have ever played a board game.

Charlotte: I feel like we've played card games before. I feel like I played a card game with you at Vidcon last year. But, no. Really?

Yeah. Well, obviously it wasn't a big deal for you. 

Hank: We should though. We have the guys from Drunk Beer and Board Games. My drunk beer and board games are going to be at Vidcon this year, so maybe we could play with them. Do you drink, Charlie?

Charlotte: I do, yeah. This is going back to, you know, changing what you think is moral to a certain extent. Obviously drinking isn't sort of like a huge issue, but over the course of the last couple of years I have started drinking. I was completely teetotal for a long. time.

Like I was teetotal, I knew I was teetotal before I even was old enough to actually drink. Like when I was 16, I was like, I'm never going to drink. And yeah, that has changed.

Jimmy: If you look very closely in Charlie's last six vlogs, he's completely drunk in every single one of them. He can barely stand up. That's not true. Should we do another question?

Hank: This is our last question of the questions. Before we get to the news, this one's from Grace, who says, Dear Hank and Charlie and Jimmy, My friend's little sister has a toy remote control car that started moving and lighting up on its own. They've had it for five years and the batteries haven't been changed since they got it. They got used to it and never had a... they got...

They got it used and it never had a remote control. Recently the headlights lit up and started moving a little forward and back. That's not what it says.

They got it used and it never had a remote control. Recently the headlights lit up and it started moving a little forward and backward. Any idea what might be? happening?

Charlie, is it a ghost?

Charlotte: Yeah, exercise it.

Hank: Yeah, exercise, not exer-size, exor-size.

Charlotte: Exor-size. No, exercise it. Just give it a good workout. Wear it out, and then it will be, once it's nice and tired, it will stop moving.

That's what I meant.

Hank: That actually would work. If you want to make it stop moving, you just keep it moving for long enough, or, you know, take the batteries out.

Charlotte: Yeah, no, that would be, yeah, it's definitely a ghost, I think. I think we've established on this podcast that... 

Hank: When I was... I actually did a little research on this question because I wanted to see if radio transmissions from nearby things, whether that was radio-controlled microphones or somebody's radio-controlled airplane that might have a really strong transmitter or a drone or something might be making this thing move, this thing might be picking up those signals. That is possible. That is a thing that can happen.

It is also possible that it just has a loose wire. But I did find in the first like like this was not an uncommonly searched question and in the first like three responses there was a ghost bulletin board. forum that was like yes, it is probably a ghost. And I was like.

I was like wow that they sure did have that answer. You know really ready to go.

Jimmy: I like the idea of the of the undead. Just deciding to possess a remote control car. That's how they're coming back to planet Earth. I'm going to take over that remote control car.

Charlotte: It's just a really bashful ghost.

Jimmy: Yeah, just a bit shy.

Charlotte: I don't really want to possess people yet. I'll just have a go at this little car. We'll just move it back and forth a little less. That's me done.

Jimmy: Hey, maybe the spirit world don't get a choice. Maybe it was just like, oh, right. So I'm a ghost, but I'm a remote control car. Great.

Brilliant.

Hank: This is I would watch this movie. Tell me more.

Charlotte: I'm almost definitely sure. I was watching Freddie Wong's channel recently and I saw that they, I think he did like a sketch of some sort where it's like a cop gets, possesses a remote control car and that's like, and it's, everybody loves the car and it's great at doing its job. So I think. that might be taken.

Jimmy: Okay. I mean, my sister used to have a Furby and that in itself.

Hank: Oh, what if the girl possessed a Furby?

Jimmy: I mean, that was supposed to be terrifying. Oh my God. I mean that.

Hank: It's like Chucky, except with a Furby. It's just sort of hobbling around slowly, being menacing. It would be really hard to have a Furby actually hurt you, I feel like, because they can't grasp things or move their arms, but...

Jimmy: I know, they'd just have to crush you psychologically. Yes. That's what would be so creepy about it.

Hank: No, that's actually...

Jimmy: They would just lay a finger on you.

Hank: That would be a really good horror movie. Just... 

Charlotte: And I think we could do that if we wanted. 

Hank: And now it is time for the news from Mars, the fourth planet in our solar system, and AFC Wimbledon, a fourth tier English soccer team. Guys, do you have any AFC Wimbledon news for us?

Charlotte: With glee and amazement, I bring you probably very important news. The Dons have signed Scunthorpe United striker Lyle Taylor for, wait for it, an undisclosed fee. Ooh. Taylor.

I feel so bad for John. I feel so bad. I felt like I initially wanted to do this with genuine enthusiasm because I feel like the best bit of this whole news section is the fact that John is so actually excited about this football team that is so small, but it's too difficult.

Yeah, Lyle Taylor, they hired him, undisclosed fee, he scored 4 times in 25 appearances last season. 

Jimmy: I don't think I've ever been this excited before. I've got some... Oh, no, this is a continuation of that news story. It's not over, guys.

Oh, no. Neil Ardley, the manager of the Dons, said he was interested in Taylor because he has very good movement and technique. His finishing is very good and he is also quick.

Of course, I have no idea whether that's a big deal or not. It sounds impressive. I mean, that's literally the first thing that came up when we searched for AFC Wimbledon.

So, I think that means it's good.

Charlotte: I mean, it's a player. They got a new player. That's a big football deal.

Hank: That's definitely news. That's definitely news.

Charlotte: It's an actual deal. It has been made.

Hank: It is a deal. Yes, and now? they have a new striker, which is a great name for a position on a football field. He strikes things.

Charlotte: Sounds very impressive.

Hank: I think mostly balls.

Jimmy: Well, you know, he's got good movement and technique. That's the manager saying that. An expert. He's got good movement and technique and his finishing is very good.

What's not to like there?

Charlotte: Also, I've done some more research. Wimbledon have not disclosed the length of his contract.

Jimmy: They're very secretive, aren't they? Oh, that's true.

Charlotte: Interesting.

Hank: We don't know how long he'll be there.

Charlotte: There's just so much mystery wrapped up in this.

Hank: Alright, I've got some Mars news. In Mars news, some very surprising rocks were found in Gale Crater by the Curiosity rover this week. The rocks, which are striated and dense with silica, are completely unexpected and very similar to granite rocks that one might find here on Earth. Most Mars rocks we find are clearly igneous rocks, but this granitic rock containing quartz and feldspar means that Mars probably billions of years ago had continental plates that drifted just like Earth's.

Those plates have long since frozen in place, but these rocks indicate that Mars was once even. more Earth-like than we previously imagined.

Charlotte: That's really interesting. I found out recently that Earth was the only planet with tectonic plates, and now that has been squashed by yet more science. That's cool. I've told you that I got to see the Curiosity rover before it was on Mars, right?

Hank: Uh, no.

Charlotte: I haven't told you that? I feel like I must have at some point. Either that or you just genuinely don't remember any interactions we've ever had. 

Hank: I'm not a good rememberer, I will say that about me.

Charlotte: Special clothes. I didn't get to touch anything at all.

Hank: What do you mean by special clothes?

Charlotte: Do you mean a pretty hat?

Jimmy: Yeah, I'm imagining sort of like a Victorian ball gown right now.

Hank: No, it's just. it was just a British schoolboy's uniform.

Jimmy: Okay, so nothing weird.

Hank: This blazer and a tie and I put my. I put my collar on top of the blazer so that everyone knew I was a total nerd. 

Jimmy: The Surprising Rocks. Thanks for watching! 

Hank: Which are? which are exactly surprising? rocks is exactly what they are. They are rocks that shouldn't be here So that they are erratic rocks and they. they are mostly deposited by the recession of glaciers during ice ages. So there will be this big rock that just doesn't belong and it's like how did this giant Rock that has nothing to do with the local geology get here and it's like oh, yeah It was carried along by a glacier and then the glacier melted and then it was there.

Jimmy: Oh, that's really cool. That's cool.

Hank: Yeah Surprising Rocks.

Jimmy: Yeah, Surprising Rocks, the new feature.

Charlotte: And now in news from Surprising Rocks. 

Hank: Alright, that is it for this episode of Dear Hank and John without John and guest hosted by the hosts of Serial Time, Charlie McDonnell and Jimmy Hill. Thank you guys for joining us.

Jimmy: Thank you! 

Hank: Wibbles around that mix for the next couple years. as John continues to do too many things.

Jimmy: I think you just need to audition for a new brother Hank. You need to do like an X Factor style audition thing. who will be the new John?

Charlotte: and he might be doing that right now We don't know. Look at all of these people he's talking to. Who knows?

Jimmy: This could be the audition.

Hank: Alright everybody, our theme music. is by Gunnarolla, the podcast is edited by Nicholas Jenkins. If you have any questions for us, you can please send them to hankandjohn at gmail.com. and as we say in our hometown, don't forget to be awesome!

Charlotte: We did our best.

Jimmy: Like a barbershop quartet.