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Kenyon College Athletics are steeped in both tradition and powdered wigs.

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Announcer: And now, "Pensive Moments" with John Green.

John: I have a theory as to why Kenyon College has been an athletic powerhouse for nearly 200 years, and this theory stems from a deeply entrenched fear of early colonial garb. A theory that I believe we all suffer from. And statistics suggests that Kenyon is the perfect amalgamation of where brains meet brawn.

First, the stats: Kenyon College, known for its academics, also leads all NCAA Division 3 colleges with a total of 57 national championships, and has won over 90 conference titles. Now, for the kicker: my independent, not-real research suggests that Kenyon's mascot, the Lord, named in honor of two English nobility lords who gave Kenyon and Gambier their names, petrify all opposing teams, due to a condition called "pulvis-capilus-phobia", a fear of powdered wigs.

Announcer: This has been​ "Pensive Moments" with John Green.