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I made a video a few weeks ago that people liked. I was just cleaning off my desktop and discovered that I had exported a version before I cut it down to four minutes so, here's that!
Good morning John! I just looked at my calendar and I realized that there's no freaking way that I could possibly make a video next week because I'm gonna be all over Los Angeles. I'm setting up my tripod. So I just asked Twitter what I should do and I got an amazing suggestion. I'm a pro! Choot! Where will I be sitting? About right there is my guess. I'm gonna zoom in, and I'm gonna clean up some of those laundries real quick. And when I say clean up I mean move from here to a little bit off frame. You'll maybe be surprised to know that Dave the Fish is still here! Just not in great shape.

So here's the idea. I turned on my mic so now I sound better. It's from Morgan who says: Review Broadway shows just based off their descriptions on Wikipedia. This is a great idea! This person should choose all of my video topics. Hello Wikipedia category Broadway Musicals! Ah, there's a lot of them. Now I'm just gonna click a bunch, see what happened and... where'd the website go?

American Dance Machine! Which I assume is a musical about a robot made in America that dances. Now there's a bunch other dancers in the musical but just one robot. This musical has a lot, lot of choreographers. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten choreographers! I mean at this point are they choreographers or are they robot programmers.

Clicky clicky clicky. Banjo Eyes. Although Cantor was known as Banjo Eyes, the title referred not to his character but to a talking race horse played in costume by the vaudeville team of Morton and Mayo! Okay! It has songs like Birthday Card and Valentine's Day Card. It also has a number called Mother's Day but not Mother's Day Card, 'cause this was before Mother's Day cards. A Nickel to My NameWho Started the Rhumba? I assume that's in reference to the vacuum cleaner robot. "Not a care in the world, 'cause I got my girl". They're always rhyming world with girl. Banjo Eyes is getting three out of three talking horses. Oh m... This is... This giant list I've been looking at is just A B C and D. There is so many Broadway plays!

Clicky clicky clicky clicky. It's a Bird... It's a Plane...It's Superman. There's a Superman musical from 1966! Why didn't anybody tell me about this! The plot revolves around Superman's efforts to defeat Dr. Abner Sedgwick, a ten-time Nobel Prize-losing scientist who seeks to avenge the scientific world's dismissal of his brilliance by attempting to destroy the world's symbol of good, which I assume is Superman. Why are Superman things always so bad!? I mean, it's playing in Germany right now so I... Like, it's still going. They did a TV special in 1975. Is that on YouTube? It sure better be. Come on. Oh it is! Oh it is! The whole thing! This is less good than every YouTube video. Oh my God, it's beautiful! They should've sent a poet.

Clicky clicky clicky opening my eyes, nothing happened. The Cocoanuts musical. The Cocoanut? Is this, is that how you spell coconuts and I'm just crazy? It... that... wait. It was a Marx Brothers thing. Irving Berlin music and lyrics. The more famous film adaptation was released in 1929. Let's see if that one's available. Just, just the preview for it. Nah, it's the Cocoanuts.

Clicky clicky clicky clicky. I never know how... okay we've got one! Marriage a la Carte. That sounds like a bad idea. Sixty-four performances in 1911. Oh we've got songs like Thrifty Little Marel: "She's a thrifty little Marel, she goes shopping just for fun". There's also a song called Silly Cock-a-Doodle-Doo, and Of All Her Sex a Paragon. Of All Her Sex a Paragon? Let's listen to Of All Her Sex a Paragon. It does not appear that Of All Her Sex a Paragon hit hard enough to continue existing now. I mean, it's in the public domain. Marriage a la Carte, Library of Congress, related items, Of All Her Sex a Paragon. Sorry, we can't find what you're looking for! It's been erased! It's a black file. I just made up the term black file but I think it's really good. Maybe I didn't. Whats a black file? Black file. It's a nail salon. Are any of the songs... Captain Dinklepop? What's Captain Dinklepop? How is there a song called Captain Dinklepop and I can't listen to it? Catch up internet! Get on my level! Somebody wrote a song called Captain Dinklepop, they worked too hard for it to have been lost to history. Ponsonby de Coutts Wragge, Thomas Bolingbroke Mullens, the names in this are amazing! Primrose Farmilow, Daisy Dimsy, Aubrey Hipps, Gerald Gifford, Rosalie, Napoleon Pettingill! Why are we so bad at naming things now!? Marriage a la Carte gets 10/10 Dinklepops! Theatre Magazine, March, 1911, says "The title is as silly and dull as the action which seeks in vain to unfold itself on the stage". Boom goes the dynamite! Let me look up the Wikipedia page for burn salve.

Click click click... Teddy & Alice! This is from 1987. Fictionalized account of the relationship between Teddy Roosevelt and his daughter Alice! Huh! It's got a song called The Thunderer and a song called Can I Let Her Go?. "Can I just leave her out there in the world alone? Can I let her go? My little girl, my little love." Like that, basically, probably, is what I'm assuming. After eleven previews, the Broadway production, directed by John Driver, opened in 1987, and ran for 77 performances. Teddy & Alice suggested Roosevelt's problems with his daughter stemmed from an obsession with his late wife. Neither the psychoanalysis nor the many familiar Sousa tunes combined with new lyrics scored with the critics or audiences. Frank Rich of The New York Times compared it to "a halftime show at a high-school football game" and chastised the producers for using Alan Jay Lerner's name: "If the show's creators had any respect for the dead, they would not give the defenseless Mr. Lerner partial artistic "credit" for such a bad show." Let's give that one just like a zero teddy bears.

Hey Morgan, thanks for the idea. Hey everyone in the world, you can spell coconuts with an "a", if you want. John, congrats on Turtles All the Way Down. I'm really proud of you, I'm very excited for it, and I will see you- wait who am I kidding we're probably hanging out right now. It's VidCon. Bye.