Good morning Hank, it's Tuesday.

Old-school Vlogbrothers video, where I talk about stuff I care about with people I care about. Today's video's like the modern pentathlon - it comes to you in five parts.

Part one, when The Fault in Our Stars first came out, people were always like, "Is Hazel Esther?"; "I can tell that Hazel is Esther"; "Hazel is Esther, isn't she?" and breathe.

It's true that Esther was a huge inspiration for The Fault in Our Stars; I could never have written it if I hadn't known her. By the way, new nerdfighters, Esther Earl was a nerdfighter who died in 2010 of cancer when she was sixteen. And she was also a friend of mine and just a generally awesome person, but this book is not about her. Esther's story doesn't belong to me; it belongs to her and to her family.

But in wonderful news, Hank, that story is going to be told! Esther was a brilliant writer, and this book - cover not final - comes out in January 2014. It's going to have her diaries, and fiction that she wrote, and letters that she wrote, and stuff from her parents, and an introduction by me. Sorry about the massive hole in my mouth, by the way; I'm hoping to have it fixed by next Tuesday.

This book is going to be Esther's story, and it's amazing, and I'm so happy that it is going to be a thing in the world, and you can pre-order it now - link in the dooblydoo.

Part two, the groundhog. So Hank, here in our Indianapolis office, we have a groundhog. We actually call him YouTube, because he spends a lot of time inside, he's easily distracted, and he knew who Hank and John were before it was cool.

Anyway, YouTube's had a quiet winter, just eating grass, but now it is spring, which means that the Canadian geese have returned from... Canada? Mexico? What am I, a wildlife biologist?

Anyway, they have returned. And there is one particularly aggressive Canadian goose with whom YouTube is locked in a battle of supremacy. Hank, this quiet battle of "I shall protect my hole" - "Well, I shall stand here and stare at you menacingly" had been going on for weeks, and it's impossible to get any work done. So if my new book doesn't come out until like 2018, you know why.

Part three, the TFiOS movie. So, Hank, it seems increasingly likely - although still definitely not certain - that there will actually be a movie adaptation of my book, The Fault in Our Stars. I know this makes Nerdfighteria nervous, and believe me, it makes me nervous, too.

But the director, Josh Boone, is a brilliant guy who really, deeply understands the books. His first movie, Stuck in Love, doesn't come out until June, but it is really great. Also, they just cast Shailene Woodley as Hazel. Shailene Woodley has like a Golden Globe nomination, and a special jury award from Sundance for the Spectacular Now, a brilliant actress and she is also a huge fan of the book. Like a real fan, Hank; she sent me a letter before any of this stuff happened.

So, Hank, you're about to hear me say the most positive thing I've ever said about Hollywood. I think we should be cautiously optimistic. And my life is a little bit weird at the moment. But it will go back to being normal soon.

Part four, oh wait, it's not going back to being normal, because I'm about to have a human child. Sarah just pointed out that in fact I am not going to have it - that's true, but I am going to be the father of it. When that happens... May, June? I will be going on a four- or possibly five-week paternity leave from Vlogbrothers, and also everything else. Except probably tumblr. I wish I knew how to quit you, tumblr.

So fear not, Hank, during my absence, you will be entertained by a series of Guest Johns, including the likes of Hannah Hart, and Grace Helbig, and also someone from nerdfighteria who is currently watching this video. Which reminds me:

Part five, we are bringing back Nerd Factor. Nerd Factor is a contest idea that we stole from Michael Buckley. Basically, nerdfighters, you should make your favorite video - only one of your videos - a video response to this video. Then we will watch all of the many video responses and pick our favorites as the winners of Nerd Factor.

Those videos and your channels will be featured in a Vlogbrothers video in the future, and one of you will be one of the paternity leave guest hosts. If you're willing to do it.

Hank, DFTBA. I'll see you on Friday.

Whoa, ow, just trying to turn off the camera, for God's sakes.