Hank: Hello, welcome to games with Hank, I am Hank! Hi-i-i- everybody wave to the people! ... EVERYBODY WAVE TO THE PEOPLE.
Everybody: (mixed hellos)
Hank: Where did my Cheetos go?
Off-Screen Male: I think your wife took- or all (?)
Hank: Throw the Cheetos. Cheeto-THROW!
Hank: Oh, oh!
Everyone: OHHHHH!!!
Hank: Party foul..! I'm gonna blame Tim for that. 
Tim: I blame you, exclusively.
Hank: It's not his fault, but I'm gonna blame him for it. Alright, hang on, hang on, let's just, let's just go back, this level is, this level is (?) Male (?): This is a smaller version than what we played earlier. 
Hank: Oh, that's gonna be intense!
Everyone: Oh, god, oh wow.
Hank: That's small, that's very small.
Everyone: (yelling, laughing) Aww, oh man, ahh, oh geez, so small, we're so small it's so small!
Male (?): Hey guys, is it small?
Everyone: (laughing) 
(Character noises and explosion sounds)
Male (?): I'm surprised it even let you play this level.
Hank: Yeah... We're doin' it. We're managing. Ahh! My hands are all greasy from the Cheetos. 
Male (?): OH, blame the Cheetos, Jeff, come on.
Male (?): EVERY other gamer in the world does it.
Everyone: (laughs)
Hank: Oh, I tried to beat up a thing that's not - a thing. Goddammit... This feels very natural to me, actually. 
Male (?): Does it?
Hank: For some reason.
Male (?): It does feel much better when everyone's just around you.
Male (?): Uh oh, uh oh, too far, too far, too far... COME ON!
Female (?): Where am I? Where am I?
Female (?): Oh, Jesus! What am I-
Female (?): Where am I, where's pika?
Female (?): Pika-piii..
Female (?): Oh, shoot, shoot, shoot!
Female (?): Someone just jumped off the edge.
Hank: What the frick.
(Character noises) (Laughter)
Hank: I keep getting stuck into the- Oh, Jack keeps doing that.
(Character noises)
(Unintelligible screaming and laughter)
Hank: AHHH! Run awa- Aww.. I exploded.
Male (?): Dibs dibs dibs! Oh no! It fell off! God-dangit. I just got a wood stick now.
Hank: Kevin!
Male (?): Oh, no..
Everyone: (laughing) Hoooooo!
Hank: Nasty!
Male (?): See that?
Female (?): I'm gonna fly up here..
Hank: Oh, I'm goin' back, don't even think about it.
Male (?): Godda-
(Character noises)
Male (?): See, that monkey man, he's just runnin' aroun-
Female (?): OH NO! Oh no...
Male (?): Oh no!
Hank: Huh! Huh!
Male (?): (strange noises)
Hank: Lucarno - LuCARNO! (?) 
Male (?): Boo!
Hank: Woah, how did you kill me just now?
Male (?): It was a - (unintelligible)
Male (?): Oh no!