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In which John goes well and truly mad from signing and then discusses the ruins of Indianapolis.

Indianapolis: I'll be reading from The Fault in Our Stars on November 1st at 7:30 PM at Clowes Memorial Hall at Butler University. The event is free and open to the public. On 11/11/11, at 11:11 AM, I'll be at the Bean in Chicago along with other people celebrating the Beckoning of Lovely. More info here: (Note: There will be no signing or reading or anything at the BOL; it's not about me; I'll just be one of many people trying to beckon lovely into the world.)

If you would like to order your signed copy of The Fault in Our Stars, you can do so at your local independent bookstore, at Barnes and Noble, at Amazon, or wherever else people preorder books.


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A Bunny
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Good morning, Hank, it's Monday. I'm wearing a suit made out of signatures, but I can't remember why. Please ignore my crazy eyes, they're crazy! Mmmm craaazyyy. I wanna thank everybody for participating in signing psychosis. Because I know my fashion sense is getting worse and worse as I get crazier and crazier with the signatures, but your fashion sense is also getting worse Nerdfighteria, and that makes me feel better. Sometimes I just like to rub my signatures. Do you think it could be the sharpie chemicals? Maybe they're making me, you know, crazy. Am I crazy? Or am I the sanest person in the room?! I'm the only person in the room. Hold on, Hank, I have to acquire another person to test my sanity. Willy, are you a dog or a man? THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A MOG, WHICH ARE YOU? Hank, I realized I must free myself from the tyranny of these signatures! Movie magic! Hank, as you know I'm under a lot of stress right now, mostly because of the TFiOS signing. Let's go to the TFiOS-ometer. OW! DAAoooow! Ooh I made a mistake! It's not as wheely as I thought it was gonna be... So, Hank, as you can see I only have twenty-five thousand copies left to sign, but a. twenty-five thousand is a lot of copies and b. I don't have any non-travel days left in which to sign those books, so I'm sort of freaking out right now. Hank, I wanna quickly thank Nerdfighteria again for giving me the worlds firstest first world problem. I signed fifty three hundred books yesterday. I took me about fourteen hours. I'm going to have to keep that pace going on every non-travel day between now and November third in order to finish. I hope that I finish, because otherwise some of you will get unsigned books and you will be very mad at me. And I will be mad at myself. There will be a lot of anger in the room! (deep breaths) Sometimes when I feel a lot of anxiety I just wanna sound my barbaric YAWP over the rooftops of the world, like, YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWP! Somebody got me a zombie unicorn hat, Hank, wasn't that nice? Alright, Hank, we are now at Holliday park, and people are looking at me funny, but I don't know why. I'm just a man, in a suit with a zombie unicorn hat filming himself. What else do you expect to see in a public park on a Monday morning? Okay, Hank, I need Nerdfighteria's help. Nerdfighters, you have uncovered the story of Ivan the Terrible's terrible library, you have found the truth about Gussie Manlove, and now I need you to explain to me the ruins. So there are these weird fake ruins in the middle of a public park here in Indianapolis. They've kind of become real ruins due to decades of neglect. So I'm hoping that by using the combined research powers of Nerdfighteria we can figure out, you know, what the heck? Hank, this would of course be a great time to use Your Pants, but unfortunately Your pants are still broken. Sentences that don't make sense out of context. So, uh, we can use a forum at the Ning, or YouTube comments here, but I'm hoping that you guys can just help me figure out: what is this strange and terrible beauty behind me? Hank, I'm gonna go back to signing, but I will see you on Wednesday. PS: Nerdfighters, I will be reading from The Fault in Our Stars in Indianapolis on November first, and I will also be at the final Beckoning of Lovely event at the Bean in Chicago in November eleventh, more info in the doobly-doo. PPS: Hank, I know we're throwing around words like crazy and psychosis, and I also know that lots of Nerdfighters, including this one, have struggled or are struggling with mental illness. So anyway, I don't wanna make fun of mental illness, I wanna make fun of me. Alright, that's all. See you tomorrow. Wednesday. Gah, I'm so bad at days!