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In which John discusses his new novel (Paper Towns), the Nerdfighting antics of Harry and the Potters, the forthcoming punishment, and Academic Decathalon.


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A Bunny
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(sit up) Good morning Hank. (sit up) It's Wednesday. (sit up) I'm getting my abs in shape (sit up) for my punishment. Also, welcome to my basement. What do you think? Hank, the light in the basement isn't very good. Let's go outside. Is it bad that my abs kind of hurt after those four sit-ups? Okay, Hank, I have to make this video super fast because I gotta go out tonight, and also I have to get back to revising my new book. By the way, Hank, I have decided that my new book is definitely going to be called Paper Towns unless I change my mind again. Do you like that title? I mean, I know it's not super commercial, but it is the perfect title for the actual book. It's interesting that my puff levels generally are not very high, but then the puff level just right here in this area is extraordinarily high. (pets head) Puff. Puff. Puff. Hank, I do have a small piece of bad news regarding my punishment: I seem to have thrown away all of my academic decathlon medals. (pictures) Hank, I know what you're wondering- you're wondering, 'Is that really Harry and the Potters doing the Nerdfighter hand thing? Hank, it is! That's some Nerdfighters with Harry and the Potters! Yay Harry and the Potters! They're like the number one Harry Potter band in the world! Commenter Margaret said something about how my academic decathlon medals prove that I'm smart, but I'm afraid that that's not actually the case. The way academic decathlon works is that there are three tiers of students. You've got your A students, your B students and your C students. A students have GPAs of 3.75 and above, B students have GPAs above 3.0 and then C students have GPAs below 2.99. Basically, what those medals mean is that I was the third best C student in the state of Alabama, which is not quite the same thing as being smart. Hey Hank, I'm wondering if we can add just one more thing to the punishment: the commenters in My Pants have been crazy about the idea that we're going to dye our hair green. I think that's a great idea, except that most green hair dyes last for about eight weeks, which is a little long if you're about to turn thirty years old. I mean, if I was twenty-six, twenty-seven, eight weeks of green hair, no problem. But when you're thirty, it just seems kinda sad. Fortunately there's that awesome spray-on green hair, pictured here. So Hank, here's my idea- you spray paint this part, the mohawk part, and then I'll spray paint all of these parts, the parts that aren't mohawk-y, and then between the two of us, we'll have a whole head of green hair. Hank, I hope it's a nice day in Missoula. It's certainly beautiful here in Indianapolis. I'm going to go and enjoy the day now. I'll see you tomorrow.