Hello and welcome to Hank Green plays Portal. I am playing Portal. I'm going to push this button. Last time I was introduced to repulsion gel - there's some more of it! Oh! It keeps coming, it's keeping coming, it's not stopping coming. Okay, what do I have to do? There's nothing - there's no way to use this here. That does not do any good. I just turned blue, and I've heard that that's bad for my skeleton. 

(0:29) Ah, I have an idea. Can I portal there? I can. Oh! That hit me in the face. That hit me right in the face. Get up there! Yeah. Woohoo! I'm up here now. Hello up here! How are you doing? Okay, that's not actually doing me as much good as I thought it might. Okay, so can I do it there? Come on through! No, I need more than that. Splash! Okay, well that's good. That's good. Oh, I can do that there too. So come on through, come on through, blue goo!

(1:08) Splash, give me a splash. Nice satisfying splash. Splash, okay, excellent. Boing! Boing! And all my portals are gone, so that's too bad. But, why did it make my portal go away? That's completely, that's just extra work for me. Go goo, go! Go! Yeah, goo! Way to go!

(1:37) I don't know that, that doesn't, that looks way too far for me. You know, it's like - maybe I could go this way. Bong! And then bong! And not stop, no, no. Okay, maybe if I just go bong - nope, nope, nope, waah! That was close to death! That was close to death. Boing.

(2:04) Okay, maybe if I just don't jump? That still looks like I'm not going to make it. I'm not, not going to make it. Okay, that's too bad. What am I doing? Oh, I have a phone call, so I have to pause. I have to pause. Goodbye!

(2:24) Okay. That was a long phone call. And now I am back. And I do not know - I have to remember what I was - what was I doing? Okay. I'm going. So I have to - oh, frickity frack! I had to use an auto save so now - go! Go, little blue dot! Yes, okay. Alright so I just have to do the jumpy.

(2:55) Jumpy. Oh, come on! I hit the thing, and I'm not going to make it. How do I make it go, but then I wouldn't even have enough. How do I? Why did I go that way? Stupid! Punkeny, punkeny. Get on the platform, you platformer! Okay, so let's just get back up there. Back up here! Okay, the jumping did not work, so, oooooh! I have to go, I have to go the way, the way of the bumblebee! There I go. Hello! I'm going! The way of the bumblebee.

(3:38) (Cave Johnson: ...that coffee we gave you earlier had fluorescent calcium in it...) Your face has fluorescent calcium in it. Oh, up again! (Cave Johnson: ...Visualizing the scenario while under stress actually triggers the reaction) I'm not stressed at all! I know that death awaits me around every corner, so I am not stressed, I am just, just pathetic, really. Just pathetic and sad and stuck.

(4:08) Okay, where am I? Moving to 27 1958 (Cave Johnson: Now if you're part of Control Group Kepler Seven...) I'm not. Wee! Water, wash off. Wow, that actually, that made the quality of that man's audio different.

(4:37) Okay. There's a button there with a thing that probably turns off the stuff. So I want to make some bouncy there. Whoops - go over there, over, over! Yes. Okay, it turned that, turned that off. Let's go here. Oh fakay fricking yes. I have talents that - I have amazing talents. 

(5:07) (Cave Johnson: I'm telling 'em, keep your pants on) What? You're telling? What? What are we doing? I feel like I should do this. I don't know why. Right, there's a spot on the wall now. Look at that spot on the wall, isn't that great? Let's do one over there too. Yeah, now the spot is bigger, slightly larger spot on the wall.

(5:44) I see, I have to hit that. So I go bonk! No, I didn't make it. Didn't make it. Okay, how, what? No, this one. Gonna hit this, I'm gonna go, I'm going to fall onto that, and no I'm not. Okay, that wasn't good at all. 

(6:18) Yeah, okay. That's better. I don't know what good this is actually going to do me. I got some of it on the ceiling up here! That's good. Okay, bonk! Oh, nope, bonk, nope bonk. Boonk! Come on, oh wait, what am I doing? That was dumb, Hank. You obviously have to go off this thing up there, from here, and then up there, and then shoot that with blue. Right? No, wait.

(6:52) Okay. Oh, duh. Right, like this, just like that. Wee! Bonk! Duh! Gel flow. Alright. I don't know why I was so stupid just now, but I apologize for being so stupid. What does this say? You will be hurt. Coworkers don't endanger others. You will be hurt. The company, replacements are costly, science, safety first.

(7:28) Alright. Where am I going? So there's a space there. And there's a space there. So I-yaaah! I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm over here now, so there's that. This is a big, empty. That's what they call it, the big empty. Is that?

(7:56) Oh come on! Oh look at that! Wait isn't that, that's where I came from. Oh geez, oh geez. Don't, don't give me this bull. Oh, come one. Arrrggg. I don't understand what's going on. I don't know what I have to do even. Do you get up there? How would I get up there? That's impossible! That is impossible. That doesn't do me any good at all!

(8:26) So if I make a blue, fall into the blue, I'm just going to see what happens. What happens? Oh. Okay, what, where am I now? (whines) I don't understand. I can't - this doesn't seem to help - woaaaahhh! Almost died in the death. Okay, so here I am here, this is here. And balls on a nut shuck. Nut shucker. Balls on a nut shucker.

(9:09) I can't walk around this thing. I can't. Can I crawl into here? I can. I'm in here now! Everybody, everybody stay calm. I'm in here. Now I can go through the other, and now I'm over here, everybody. Don't check me out, I am over here. That seems to have done me absolutely no-aaaahhgghghgh. I don't like the hills - death.

(9:38) Okay, here I go. Walking, and I'm back in here. What does this do for me? I can't make portals, and I don't - go on, walk through. Oh, come on. Really? Really? This has done me no good at all! I'm over here, but I feel like if I'm here there should be a reason why I'm here. There's gotta be a reason. But I want to go up there! Man, oh man of Pete! Man of Pete! Okay, okay, okay, okay, I don't know.

(10:17) Okay, well thank you for watching this episode of Hank Green plays Portal. And I appreciate your comments below telling me what the frick I should be doing. I will talk to you soon. Thank you. You will not see me and I will not see you. Click the annotation in the top right hand side of the video if you want to watch the next one. Goodbye.