Oh good morning, Hank, it's Tuesday. I didn't see you there, I was busy working on my new book in my usual novel writing position. Anyway, today's video comes to you in 4 parts.

Part 1: Johning
So the nice people at The Hollywood Reporter wrote an article about The Fault In Our Stars movie and me, and they included this picture, and then long-time nerdfighter Emily posted a picture of herself doing what she called "Johning". And then Charlie McDonnell did one, and then began a massive flood of Johning including Josh Sundquist, and this very small person, and you, Hank and lots, and lots of other people. Anyway Hank, the cast of the movie thinks that Johning is hilarious, as do I, so I just wanted to say, thank you for Johning.

Part 2: Your birthday!
Hank it was your birthday yesterday. Happy Birthday! Unlike last year I did remember to get you a present this year from me and also from nerdfighteria. The original arcade game, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. TMNT for life, Hank! This is a real tattoo by the way, is that weird? (whispers) It's not a real tattoo.  Also Hank, I got you a donation to Partners in Health. Partners in Health, for actual life.

Part 3: Hank Green and the Perfect Strangers
It just occurred to me that this video is going to have more than 3 parts. I apologize for that. Why does my hair look so like weird and grown up and professional? Hank, your excellent new album Incongruent comes out tomorrow, so nerdfighters, that means that today is the last day that you can pre-order a signed copy. There is a link in the doobly-doo. Also, for those of you who prefer your goods and services digitally, the album will be out on iTunes tomorrow. Hank, I don't want to get all Esther Day-y on you or anything, but when I was listening to the album, I was reminded of what a great musician you are in addition to all the other things you do, and I really admire you and the way that you go about your work. I'm getting Esther Day-y. Anyway Hank, long story short, you're not that cool, you're a grapefruit.

Part 4: The many headless and/or faceless people in my hotel room
So Hank I'm doing all this like TFIOS press junket stuff with the cast of the movie and they put us in a very nice hotel, but there are a lot of people in my room with no heads. This person has no head. This person has no head. This person, also no head. No head. And then there are these people who I think have heads but definitely do not have faces. This guy has half a face which by the standards of this hotel room puts him in like the top 1% of facedness. 

Part 5: Tour
So Hank, the Fault In Our Stars movie stuff is starting to like actually happen now. Like we just had our first screening for fans of the book, which was nuts! And most importantly, they liked the movie. Like Hank, I guess I want the movie to do well, but to be completely honest with you, ultimately what I want is for people who care about the book a lot to like the movie.  And I got to sit in the back of the theater for like the last fifteen minutes of the movie and I heard quite a lot of sobbing, which I found very encouraging. Anyway, now, starting today actually, I get to go on tour with Shailene and Ansel and Nat. Okay for of these the doors will open at 5, and the show will start around 6:30. This is Fox's tour, not mine, so I seriously have no idea what's going to happen but I do know that it's free!  

Today, we will be in Miami, Florida at the Dolphin Mall. Is it an actual dolphin? Is it a gigantic dolphin that they turned into a mall? That seems like animal cruelty. Wednesday, we will be in Cleveland at the Tower City Center. Thursday, we will be in lovely Nashville, Tennessee at the War Memorial Auditorium at the Tennessee Performing Arts Center, and Friday, May 9th we'll be in Dallas, Texas at the South Side Ballroom at Gilley's, or possibly Jilley's. Like I said earlier, I don't know much about what's gonna actually happen at these events, but I know there won't be signings because they're just expecting a lot of people. But there will be like Q&A and general merriment. I think it'll be fun.

Hank, congratulations again on your great album and thank you for being such a good friend and brother to me in this great but also very weird time of my life. DFTBA, Nerdfighteria! Hank, I will see you on Friday.