Good morning, Hank, it's Tuesday Today I want to tell you a story about this stuffed honey badger and my son, and I also want to tell you the best news ever, but first it's the time for the bank of Nerdfighteria's quarterly report, so I guess I should get dressed up. And done. So Hank, as you know, the bank of Nerdfighteria has two arms, the lending arm and the giving arm. A lot of banks have a third arm, the taking arm, but we believe that two arms is enough. Well unless you're juggling, then a third arm is super helpful. Let's begin our report with the giving arm, the foundation to decrease world suck. Update one: Hank, the foundation to decrease world suck has been a project of Nerdfighteria for more than five years, but we are finally becoming an actual charity, like, that you can make tax deductible donations to, so that process is ongoing an very complicated. Update two: financials. Right, so at the end of the last quarter the foundation to decrease world suck had more than $9000 in its coffers and today we have, like, $30 in our coffers, which represents a tremendous success! Because the whole story is that we went from $9000 to $88,000 to nothing, because we gave it all away. more than $16,500 was sent to each of five charities, which were chosen by Nerdfighteria; they were Kids in Need of Desks, This Star Won't Go Out, the H.P. Alliance, Water.org, and the other one...what's the other one...oh. Kiva, right. The operating costs of the foundation to decrease world suck continue to be zero, so every dollar donated goes to charity. By the way, Hank, I like that my puff ends right where yours begins; it's like-- it's like, a puff portal. So Nerdfighters, thanks for all your hard work during the project for awesome and look how much suck we decreased. And now we come to the second arm of the bank of Nerdfighteria, the lending arm. So Hank, Kiva.org is this amazing website that Nerdfighters have been using for many years that allows regular people to make loans to entrepreneurs in the developing world. So basically, I loaned, for instance, Edgar in Peru money so he can increase the yield on his land or Henry in South Sudan money so he can buy more supplies for his store, and then they pay me back, basically giving developing world entrepreneurs access to the same kind of inexpensive credit and banking systems that the rest of us benefit from and, frankly, kinda take for granted. And the coolest part is that 99% of the time you get paid back. Actually, that used to be the coolest part; that's now the second coolest part, but I'll get to the coolest part in a second. Okay, Hank, so in the last quarter the Nerdfighter Kiva group has gone from $75,000 in loans to $239,000 in loans, which represents a quarterly increase of, like, a gajillion percent. Actually 319%, I just Google chatted with resident mathematician Daniel Biss. Our Kiva group now has over 9000 members. Over 9000 members. anybody? huh...? is that meme too old and that joke too subtle? sorry. And right now, Hank, we're near the total amount loaned this month, comfortably situated between the Atheists and the Christians. But Nerdfighters, that is not even the best news. Here is the best news: if you are not currently a member of Kiva and you are one of the next 20,000 people to become a member, I am pointing at my pants because there is a link in the dooblydoo, you will be given a free loan. Well it won't be free, it'll be paid for by one of the co-founders of Linkedin, but it will be free to you! Thanks to this guy's generosity it costs you nothing to become an awesome banker. You can go right now and make a $25 loan to an entrepreneur in the developing world for free. So hopefully, Nerdfighters,if lots of you take advantage of that our group will grow even more and you will discover the wonders of micro-finance and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt. I've gotta tell you a story about a honey badger. So Hank, when we were on tour a Nerdfighter gave me this homemade honey badger and Henry has become completely obsessed with it. And Henry basically only has two questions about everything in the world, whether it's an airplane or a person, what sound does it make and what does it eat? So I told him the truth, that if you hear the sound a honey badger makes it's too late for you and that honey badgers eat everything. So he interpreted that second answer very broadly. Like, whenever we can't find the remote he's always like, "honey badger eat it". And when you try to explain to him the extinction of the dinosaurs he's like, "honey badger eat dinosaurs." All of which is to say, Hank, that when I asked Henry why he thought the universe had no edge, I knew how he'd answer, but I was still delighted... That's right, Hank, honey badger ate the edge. I'll see you on Friday.