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View count:324,684
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Duration:03:08
Uploaded:2017-11-02
Last sync:2019-07-23 08:30
In which Hank steals John's idea and reviews things that would not normally be reviewed.

The DFTBA Awesome Socks Club sends you a new pair of super comfy socks every month for a years. $12 per pair with free shipping WORLDWIDE! https://store.dftba.com/products/12-month-subscription

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H: Good morning John. Do you remember when you had that idea for making a channel, where you just review, like, not things, but ideas of things?

J: Yeah, I was gonna call it "The Anthropocene Reviewed'.

H: I'm gonna do that in this video. I'm just gonna do a bunch of 'em.

J: Great! I can't wait!

H: See how it goes.

J: I'm excited.

H: Let's start with the city of Springfield, Oregon as viewed from an airplane. Three stars, entirely without apparent intentionality. Too many rivers, making the space feel confined. Also, the rivers' directionless meandering clashes with the right angles formed by the I-5/I-105 intersection. And finally how can one be sure whether they're looking at Springfield or Eugene? Which is it? I left it behind feeling confused and unsettled. I'm sure it's lovely close up, though.

Orange traffic cones: five stars. Built simultaneously for durability, visibility, stability, stackability and low cost, the orange traffic cone was almost an inevitability. Stability can be increased by adding heavy-duty rubber to the base and visibility can be increased by adding reflective collars. Orange traffic cones can survive vehicle impacts in excess of 65 miles per hour and still be usable, and yet, they cost less that a gin and tonic in Manhattan. These temporary traffic control devices have converged upon their best possible form.

Half-drunk bottle of Fiji water: Two stars. As we are not sure who drank the first half of this bottle of Fiji water, no one is enthusiastic about finishing it. Any one of us would no doubt take it down if there were no other options, but there are other options. The half-drunk state does, however, allow one to appreciate the care with which the design of the Fiji bottle takes advantage of the refraction of the water to interact with the interior printing. But on the whole, I feel guilty that this water was shipped from Fiji and now, probably, no one is going to drink it. 

Socks: Five stars. Socks are designed for absorbency, warmth, and to reduce friction. And, counter-intuitively, while the sock is one of humanity's most valuable creations, the feeling of removing a sock at the end of the day is a five-star sensation as well. Socks' decorative properties, while not part of their core function, are high-quality as well. They allow the wearer to make subtle, yet powerful statements. 

The first sock on the DFTBA Awesome Socks Club Subscription for 2017: five stars. Designed by Rachel Calderon Navarro, these socks are cushy, durable and warm, the culmination of the testing of many different socks. Rachel's design sense makes these socks a subtle, yet surprising pop of color at the base of anyone's jeans. Sock Club entrants are limited. You'll get a new pair of DFTBA socks every month, but you can only sign up during the month of November.

This 1970s thermostat: 3.5 stars. These handcrafted thermostats really resonate with me. It's easy to understand how they were constructed by human hands and the design elements were clearly built around the necessity of their form, which was limited by the injection molding techniques of the time. But oh hmm, something seems to be off. There, that's better. Now we're up to four stars. One wonders how long that had been off kilter. Ah, and let me fix this as well. That's better. 4.5 stars.

John, I'll see you on Tuesday.