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In which John stuns the world by answering real questions from real nerdfighters in an airport on his way to the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland. Issues discusses include John's anxiety around the WEF, his excitement about visiting the setting of Thomas Mann's novel The Magic Mountain, how dogs should wear pants, the Looking for Alaska movie, his new story, the still not technically real U.S. Presidential election, and more.

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John: Good morning Hank, it's Tuesday.

In a stirring turn of events I find myself in an airport. I'm on my way to Davos, Switzerland for the World Economic Forum, which is a gathering of like world leaders and CEOs and Leonardo DiCaprio and I guess me to discuss the future of the world's economy. I'm not even there yet and I already feel a little bit out of place, but Davos, Switzerland was also the setting of one of my all-time favorite novels The Magic Mountain by Thomas Mann. So, while I'm there I get to do a bit of literary tourism which as you know Hank is one of my favorite hobbies. My three favorite hobbies of course being eating pizza, sponsoring fourth tier soccer teams, and literary tourism. Anyway, you can follow my trip to Davos on my twitter or Instagram or Snapchat (I don't actually know how to log on to my Snapchat, but I'm gonna try to figure it out).

All of that however is an aside because it's Tuesday, it's Question Tuesday, the day that I answer real questions from real nerdfighters, let's belatedly get right to it!

How's the writing going?
I think it's going well, I'm sorry it's taking so long.

Hey, what's gonna be the title of your new book?
I don't know. You got any ideas? I'm definitely in the market for a good title, so if you have one leave it in comments.

What is your opinion of inside jokes?
[clip plays of cheez doodles guy]
cheez doodles guy: YAAAAAAAA

Who are you gonna vote for for pres-
NO, no, no, no, no, I am not paying attention to the so-called presidential election until 100 days before the primary in my home state of Indiana. Which means I have a few more blessed days not to think about it and I am going to enjoy them.

Will you be my friend even though I'm a Slytherin?
Yeah sure! Hufflepuffs are kind and caring and open... unlike some people I know.

Can you six degrees of Kevin Bacon yourself?
Yeah, I acted in The Fault in Our Stars movie. Admittedly my scene was cut, but it was in the extended version, I acted with Laura Dern who was in Novocaine with Kevin Bacon.

How should a dog wear pants?
When it comes to dogs with pants, I stand with the president.

At this point, do presidential debates actually accomplish what they're supposed to accomplish?
Well so far as I can tell, at this point what they're supposed to accomplish is selling lots pf extra expensive advertising on cable news networks, in which case yeah, they're very effective.

How do you think the world will end?
Well, I've got a list of my top 10 eschatological anxieties but in the end I'm with TS Elliot on this one: "not with a bang, but with a whimper."

When is Looking for Alaska gonna be made into a movie?
Ughhhh, I don't know, maybe never? I sold the rights to a movie studio more than 10 years ago and I have tried many, many, many times to buy them back in the intervening decade but thus far it hasn't happened. They've tried to make a movie a bunch of times, but it's always fallen apart for one reason or another and at this point I'm not involved in the project in any way. I'm not gonna lie, it definitely bums me out, but it also reminds me just how lucky I was to have two amazing book-to-movie experiences. The truth is authors are almost never as welcomed into the process as I was with The Fault in Our Stars and Paper Towns, so I try just to be grateful for that. So if you don't hear Looking For Alaska updates from me, that's why. Uhhhh, maybe that'll change someday, I hope so  but I don't expect so.

Any plans to come back to CrashCourse?
Yes, this Summer, we're gonna do another miniseries of CrashCourse Literature, we're gonna read Huckleberry Finn and Invisible Man and 100 of Solitude and Their Eyes Were Watching God and some Shakespearean sonnets, it's gonna be amazing!

Who's your celebrity crush?
Right now I'd definitely say Lin Manuel Miranda.

Is there a smell that's important to you and brings you back to a particular time in your life?
Yeah there's an odor of like spray smell called spring rain that brings me back to high school  because it's what my roommate and I always used to cover up the smell of cigarette smoke. Obviously don't smoke, it's a tremendous waste of time and money, but that spring rain odor brings me right back to high school. It's like this horrific, horrific scent but it only makes me feel happy.

Alright Hank, I have to go aboard the plane, next week I'll have some thoughts from Davos in the meantime I will see you on Friday.