Good morning John. I wrote this song after we went on tour because people kept asking me a question that I didn't have an answer to. And this song is my answer to that question.

(Singing)

There's something happening on the internet
And I don't really get it
Once again I'll have to say, I'm not into that
But I'm sure that I'll regret it
'Cause I know thousands of people never cared about anything more
They've spent the last six months making Tumblrs, fanfic and bulletin boards
And I think all that excitement is great
But when they ask, I have no choice
I still have to say

That I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I've never seen that show
And I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I'm 31 years old
And I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I'm a self-respecting dude
And I don't have a favorite pony 'cause I
I just can't choose

Well Dash the Pegasus has rainbow hair and the cutest cutie mark
And Applejack is the strongest mare, always working so hard
And Fluttershy has totally got that Marilyn vibe going on
But when it comes to the the beauty prize, oh Rarity's already won,
and Pinkie Pie's excitement could fuel a jet plane,
But Twilight's the nerdiest, and that goes a long way

But I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I've never seen that show
And I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I'm 31 freakin' years old
And I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I'm a self-respecting dude
And I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I just can't choose

Well, my goal is to make this a better planet
and I don't take that lightly
I should be workin' my butt all day dammit
And with luck I might be
But it's equally probable that instead of changing the world
I've spent the last 6 hours watching a cartoon made for little girls
Oh, Battles in the real world are so complexly won
It's all so much simpler in Equestria

But I don't have a favorite pony
I don't have one even though
I've spent the whole day trying to pick
By watching all episodes
I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I'm a self respecting guy
And I don't have a favorite pony, 'cause I...
I like Spike.

Thank you Michael Aranda, of course, for doing the effects. And also, to the people who put together a bunch of green screen ponies. Woo, green screen ponies! Links to their channel. Well done.

I'm at LeakyCon right now. I filmed this in the past. But I'm not gonna talk about it, 'cause, you know, if you're watching this, you're either there or you're not.

But what I am gonna talk about, 'cause John, maybe you aren't as excited about this as I am, is the Evil Baby Orphanage card game Kickstarter. I'm a tabletop card game kinda guy, and I am unashamed of that. My original Nerdfighter song was about Magic the Gathering, if you remember. You probably don't. It was a long time ago.

And you may not thus remember the Evil Baby Orphanage, but if you don't, it was an idea that John and I conceived in order to escape the conundrum of whether or not to kill baby Hitler if you had the chance. 'Cause if you have the chance to kill him, you also have the chance to abduct him and bring him to an Evil Baby Orphanage.

Well, the very talented people at Wyrd Games got their hands on this idea and when I saw it on Kickstarter, I was like, hey guys. Guys, guys, guys. Can I help? Can I help? Guys, can I help?

So they gave me a look at the whole game. It's basically like you have to collect babies to get mischief points, and you get more mischief points, and eventually you win. But they're a bunch for babies that have more mischief points get passed like from Time Nanny to Time Nanny. Also, you're a Time Nanny. And at $50,000, they're gonna do a Nerdfighter expansion, which will include John and me as Time Nannies. You will be able to play as us. But you only get that and the other expansion perks, coloring book, stuff, if you pledge more than $40. So remember that.

And if you're seeing this video after the Kickstarter ends, it's ending very soon like 2 or 3 days, don't fret. The game will be available for sale at your local game stores and probably at dftba.com.

John, I will see you right now 'cause you're at LeakyCon too. Bye.

I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I've never seen that show
And I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I'm 31 years old
And I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I'm a self-respecting dude
And I don't have a favorite pony
'Cause I just can't choose