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Last sync:2023-08-26 13:45
In which Mike investigates the top Google "how to" searches and teaches you how to tie a tie, how to file (taxes?), how to get a passport, how to knit, how to blog, how to kiss, how to flirt, how to unjailbreak your iPhone*, and how to Vader.

*A note about jailbreaking: Srsly, we don't recommend it, and also we can't be held responsible for anything that may happen as a result of jailbreaking/unjailbreaking your iPhone.

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Created by:
Emma Mills & Mike Martin
Mike is also a Young Adult novelist. His book, THE END GAMES, is available at all online booksellers, including
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Written, Hosted, Directed, and Edited by:
T. Michael (Mike) Martin

Executive Producers:
Hank & John Green

Michael: Hey guys, so recently we were looking at the most Google how to searches and we thought why not do the top ten all in one video. Here it goes.

Number 1: How to tie a tie (0:22)
So you got papa tie and baby tie. Now papa tie is gonna be about a foot longer and you want baby tie to be just an inch above your pants. So papa tie goes over baby tie. Papa tie comes behind baby tie. One more time, papa tie goes in front of baby tie. Then, there's a little loop here below your neck, and that is where papa tie wants to go. So you let him go through the little hole and then you've got another little hole right there. So papa tie goes through there and you just pull him all the way down. To bring it up to your neck pull up on the little tie.

Number 2: How to File (1:05)
Now I assume this refers to how to file your taxes, in which case Hank Green and I can help You out! Just click my face. Click my face.

Number 3: How to Get a Passport (1:14)
Now this is going to vary from country to country but for those of us in America, I will quote the U.S. state department.
Step 1; fill out a form DS-11, but don't sign it until after step 2. Submit the completed form DS-11, in person, at an agency or an acceptance facility.
Step 3; submit evidence of U.S. citizenship.
Step 4; present identification, such as a driver's license.
Step 5; submit a copy of the identification documents.
Step 6; pay the applicable fee.
Step 7; provide 1 passport photo which is often taken at the place where you are applying. 

Number 4: How to Blog (1:47
Well of course it's super easy to start a blog these days. How do you actually build an audience? Well from what I understand it's probably a lot like building a YouTube audience so here are some of my thoughts on that.
Step 1; ask yourself what you really love and what you can sustainably make content and content and content about. And also ask yourself, 'how can I take what I love, and use it to somehow make other people's lives better?' 
Step 2; make a lot of content. Some of it will be great, some not so much, but that's okay. The increasing awesomeness will be a reflection of your passion and also your self-education which leads to step 3.
Research what other people who are successful in the same space are doing. This is now advice to become a copycat. It's just about reverse engineering the stuff you love so you can try and infuse those qualities into some of the stuff you make.
And step 4; without being spammy reach out to other people who are in that same space. You can do this through comments or tweets or reblogs, etc. For me the key is to networking without being a d-bag, or to be genuine and helpful and grateful. Also, connect with people who have the same sized audience as you do. Hopefully you guys will grow together. Not everyone will respond well or at all but some people will. And because on the internet today networking can be as important as content, these connections are gonna be worth their weight in Bitcoin.

Number 5: How to Knit (3:04
Seriously? This is so easy. I've been doing this since I was a kid. Although, admittedly I'm not as good at it as I used to be.
To knit your brow, find a nice quiet space and think of all the things that are outside of your control. Oh wait a second. I think this might mean knitting with yarn, which I don't know how to do. But this person, who is smarter than I am, does. 

Numbers 6-7: How to Kiss, How to Flirt (3:29)
For these questions we are going to turn to our buddy Dr. Lindsey Doe from Sexplanations. Start with oral hygiene. Brush, floss, suck on a favorite mouth freshener. Then ask permission: 'May I kiss you?' With a yes, move forward tilt head, then come closer as if to breathe the person in. Pay attention to what the other person is doing. How to flirt. Dr. Doe actually have a video all about this, which we'll link to in the doobly-doo, but basically make eye contact more than once. Approach them with a friendly 'Hi, my name is,' but don't shake hands like usual. Then touch like and arm bump or high five. If it is going well, your movements will synchronize. Just make sure to laugh and show you're enjoying the experience. 

Number 8: How to Whistle (4:10)
I can't do this. But apparently you moisten your lips, make an 'O' shape with your lips, place your tongue on the back of your bottom teeth or on your bottom gum, and then exhale.

Number 9: How to Unjailbreak Your iPhone (4:21)
Okay, so there is no official explanation from apple on how to do this because they don't want you to jailbreak it in the first place, but here are the steps that I found.
1; back up your phone in iTunes.
2; restore your phone in iTunes.
3; you're unjailbroken.

Number 10: How to Vader? (4:38)
H-hey buddy. Please don't do that. Come on. Eugh! Holy crap. Not again. (choking sounds) I... loved... you....

(Piano sounds)

Here for a bonus is Number 11: (5:07)
What is the official how to adult catchphrase?