Good morning, John.

It is January 28th. It is a Wednesday. And this is a song Wednesday so I'm about to do a song, but I have a little explanation first.

I will have you know this is the first song I'm recording on my new MacBook Pro. And I'm also recording it with Final Cut Express, so this is all very new to me, and I'm very confused. But I think that I've done an okay job getting this together.

It was good that I had Final Cut Express because this was the kinda complicated song to do, largely because I couldn't sing it myself because it's a parody of another song and that song is pretty far outside of my range. I'll show you at the end of the video with me trying to sing it. So I got Katherine to sing it for me and then I lip-synced over it, because that is the only way that she would agree to sing it for me.

So this is a little weird because I'm not singing it and I also didn't really write this song, but John and I discussed it and he said that this is perfectly okay for me to do parodies on Song Wednesdays. He didn't say it was okay for Katherine to sing it, but there was really no other way that this was gonna get done. So, without further ado, Stock Advisor: --- I met you in an office down on main street you said you could make my future much more easy all I had to do was give you access to my money and you'd double it double it baby I never really understood the things that you would say If we amortized deposits into my IRA We could optimize my no-load fund with proceeds from my tax refund we'd just begun Just begun baby Stock advisor Stock Ad Stock adviser your my stock adviser OH stock adviser OH you're my stock adviser baby You you you are you you you are stock adviser you are my investment analyzer I will tell you what I I Just reali-i-ized I will not reti-i-ire until I'm eighty fi-i-ive (You) You lost my money (You) This isn't funny (You) That's right I trusted (You) My stock advisor I will tell you what I I Just reali-i-ized I will not reti-i-ire until I'm eighty fi-i-ive (You) You said my future (You) Would be secure (You) That's right I trusted (You) My stock advisor You said stocks were always gonna go up Now I look at you and it makes me want to throw up You said there were risks out there but I could be a millionaire just like you just like you baby Market Crash!

Ever since then I've been drinkin' And I can't determine what exactly I was thinkin' Half of all my savings gone, bank accounts overdrawn all for you all for you baby Stock advisor Stock Ad Stock adviser your my stock adviser OH stock adviser OH you're my stock adviser baby You you you are you you you are stock adviser you are my investment analyzer I will tell you what I I Just reali-i-ized I will not reti-i-ire until I'm eighty fi-i-ive (You) You lost my money (You) This isn't funny (You) That's right I trusted (You) My stock advisor I will tell you what I I Just reali-i-ized I will not reti-i-ire until I'm eighty fi-i-ive (You) You said my future (You) Would be secure (You) That's right I trusted (You) My stock advisor Maybe if we still lived in 2003 You could have given me some kind of guarantee But we don't so you can't YOUUU Stock advisor Stock ad Stock advisor You're my stock advisor Oh, stock advisor Oh, you're my stock advisor Baby --- Thank you, of course, to Britney, because it never would have happen without you, girl. Outtakes: Hank, attempting to sing: You, you are my stock advisor, you're my stock advisor, my investment analyzer. (Text: SEE! Aren't you glad I made Katherine do this for me!) Katherine: I'm kinda (BEEP) (Text: Dirty mouth!) That's right, I trusted my stock advisor. *both laugh* Hank: And now I'm out of time.

DFTBA!