Good morning, John!

So, in the last video in which it was not your birthday, I had some footage of the demolition derby-- I'm running into my tripod. Stupid tripod! Ha!

Also I'm not talking into my mic!! Goddammit. Okay!

Starting over again from the beginning! Good morning, John! That's how these things start.

So in my last video that wasn't your birthday, I talked about the County Fair and I mentioned the Demolition Derby. And there were all these people in the comments who were like, "Demolition Derby? I thought those were fictional!" Okay, I know that the hay-day of demolition derbies are long gone and there will no longer ever be a real professional demolition derby circuit, but that doesn't mean you guys shouldn't know what demolition derbies are!

So I got very excited about the possibility of introducing people to Demolition Derby, and that is what I would like to do with my song today! My God, I'm excited! Why am I screaming?

I've put on a nice shirt. I'm about to put on a jacket so I can record this song, cuz, y'know, Demolition Derby, you should be wearing nice clothes... No, you shouldn't, I don't know why I am.

It just feels right! [Sings] Yeah, we got our tickets ready We're ready to go Pay 2 bucks extra to be in the front row So grab your deep fried cheeses and your deep fried meats Your deep fried veggies and your deep fried sweets All that mangled metal And the flaming exhaust Is worth every dime no matter how much it costs you There's a lot of good things about the County Fair, But the Demolition Derby is why I'm there! Oh the Demolition Derby's got it goin' on The Demolition Derby all night long Demolition Derby, that guy just lost his tire Demolition Derby, now I think he's on fire Demolition Derby is why I'm there Well a lot of old cars are ready to say goodbye But we can't let a death panel choose how they die With Cash For Clunkers, you get 4,000 bucks But there's much more exciting ways to ditch your old truck So strap your haulin' on and grind down your gears And take a shot of whiskey and conquer your fears Yeah there's a lot of old (good) ways to get rid of old cars But the Demolition Derby is the best by far Demolition Derby got it goin' on Demolition Derby all night long Demolition Derby, Motocross intermission Demolition Derby, then get back to competition Oh The Demolition Derby is why I'm there (I gotta push my glasses up, they're fallin' off my face! Ha, there we go, Yeah...) I hear the engines roarin', the screamin' crowd Anything this much fun shouldn't be allowed Yeah nose to nose and trunk to trunk Nothing's left over but hunks of junk Yeah, this is my church, and these are my prayers Smashin' each other and flyin' through the air One car left runnin' I shed a single tear Demolition Derby, I'll see you next year Oh Demolition Derby, yeah, that carborator's rusted Demolition Derby, and your radiator's busted Demolition Derby, they thought you'd win the cash Demolition Derby, but you just got whiplash Demolition Derby, I'll see you next year [Song ends] That wasn't very good, haha.

But maybe it was just good enough. I was actually able to collaboratively write this song using etherpad. You can just write, and everyone can just write on the same page.

And then, I started writing the song, because I had some of the verses already. And then people just filled stuff in. And so, several of these lines are from Nerdfighters.

Thank you very much to the Nerdfighters who were in the room! I would like to announce that This Is Not Tom is continuing, and the story continues to be amazing. And also, that there will be a Truth or Fail going live this Friday with John and Jory from the microwave show: "Is It A Good Idea To Microwave This?" So hopefully, you will enjoy that on Friday.

I know I'm enjoying it just editing it, because those guys are hilarious! John, thank you for being a good brother. And Nerdfighters, thank you for being good Nerdfighters.

I'm just rambling now. BLALALAALALALAGH