(Guitar music)
Hank: Oh it seems so exciting, I can talk to anyone,
Just begin the game and launch into the fun.
But fifteen minutes later and I haven't had the chance
to talk to anyone but that giant guy in women's underpants. 
It's the kind of instant judgment that I fear in the real world
Where it only takes a moment for them to tell you're not a girl.
They click on next, the game is over, and yes I've lost again,
but I keep on trying anyways because someday soon I'll win.
And I try to pour my heart out, but they keep clicking next
Because I'm having a bad day on chat roulette,
oh, I'm having a bad day on chat roulette.

Then suddenly, this cute girl, she pops up on my screen
She's like the answer to my prayers, the woman of my dreams
She pauses on my face, and I think she-
She pauses on my face, and I think she could be mine,
I say hello, she smiles, I've got my chance
and then she hits F9...
And then, suddenly, she's replaced by some angry British teens,
followed by a person who does not want to be seen,
and then a guy with awesome abs who won't put on his shirt,
and then of course a very, very long string of perverts.

And I try to pour my heart out, but they keep clicking next
Because I'm having a bad day on chat roulette,
Oh I'm having a bad day on chat roulette.

Well the pretty girls are busy having pleasant conversations
with guys who've been nexting for hours.
I really should eliminate all of my expectations
I should probably go take a shower.
Then a guy comes on he sees me playing
says he understands every thing I'm saying
and he puts down his guitar and he plays along 
and we sing this song
So we try to pour our hearts out, but they keep clicking next,
Because we're having a bad day on chat roulette,
Oh, we're having a bad day on chat roulette,
Yes, we're having a bad day on chat roulette.