Hank: Good morning, John. I still surrounded by confetti. I have not cleaned I have got all the food up I think, but I'm still absolutely surrounded by trash... like This says "eat a baked bean ice cream sundae" which I did, and was good!!!
it's the future!!!
the project for awesome was lovely.  It was the largest project for awesome of all time we raised in total over 3.5 million dollar. But my brain is so full and I'm so busy that there was no way I was going to do a regular video today- I have so
many good ideas for videos by the way right now - but they're all complicated, so I wanted to do something simple. So I've just edited one of my favorite pieces of the project for awesome, into a video so, to stop me from continuing to ramble
here's me and Tyler Thrasher:

Tyler: are you ready for some would you rathers
Hank: yeah 
Tyler: would you rather be the juiciest Hank in the world or the driest Hank in the world
Hank: Oh I'd rather be juicy!  ...average Hank even average any human is far juicier than they are dry. like I
don't have that far to go to get to max juicy
Tyler: [laughter]
Hank: 've got a long way to go to get to max dry
Tyler: all right, juiciest Hank in the
world it is. would you rather have gummy teeth or noodle fingers.
Hank: I that's... that's tough, those are both awful. Are my gummy teeth sweet.
Tyler: yeah if I think if you lick them for like 10 minutes straight you kind of get like a sweet little...
Hank: I mean...
Tyler: ...it it could be a little something something
Hank: I'd rather have no teeth than no fingers. I'd rather have gummy teeth than noodle fingers. I'd ra- like fingers are more important than teeth, uh to to me. I'd rather miss out on all solid food than all liquid food.
Tyler: I mean your still going with the the juicy theme
Hank: yeah juicy Hank! [sings] going to move ya
Tyler: you are shrunk to the size of an ant what are you doing to let Katherine know of your current predicament.
Hank: oh wow no. I don't, I mean I'll be honest with you Tyler, I don't think I'd make it out alive. Step one eat: fill up my little ant belly, which would, in this room not be hard. I spilled a bunch of nerds on the ground yesterday and then I rolled my chair over them, like they are perfect ant food. Step two hide, because Katherine's gonna come in here, and she's gonna be like where the hell is Hank, and if she sees an ant she will kill it. Then I start to move on the black carpet I start to move things - because I'm an ant, and I can carry things that are quite heavy- and spell out "I'm an ant - H" because once they see I'm an ant they they could see the smaller message that I'm also leaving, with the crumbs around my office that say, "Katherine it's Hank, I've been turned into an ant by Evil wizard Tyler Thrasher and I need you to go to Oklahoma and and get him, and bring him here to restore me to my normal natural healthy human self full of juice.
Tyler: you're allowed to take one item back to 15th century Europe. this item should Inspire the masses without you being tried as a witch. what is this item?

Hank: like you wouldn't want to jump too far forward, like you want it to be a piece of technology somebody could look at and understand, so like a microscope. But like a old like that looks like it was made by like it could have been made by a human hand rather than a bunch of machine parts, like a nicer but still old telescope, or a watch. Like something mechanical that people could understand, and then also I could try and figure out how it works cuz honestly, I don't know.
[reading chat] "Baja Blast for sure" says lamb dog
I think probably Baja Blast would would, inspire some followers
Tyler: would you rather give birth to a live fluttering moth or a slimy snail, the size is dependent on the hole. Hank you pick the hole
Hank: my first thought was that the that it comes out the butt. um the butt is the part of my body that's most used to having stuff come out.of it. You know my first thought was a life fluttering moth because that's smaller, but the Slime is is a plus in this situation
Tyler: it's juicy it's juicier
Hank: it's a lubricant. I think, I think snail butt
Tyler: and you get to keep it as a pet, too that's a plus
Hank: oh that is great, I think I'd prefer to have a snail.
Tyler: big old snail okay all right butt snail it is
Hank: I see lot of mouth moths in chat, and I understand you
Tyler: would you rather experience- now you don't actually die- you just experience death in space, but you get your favorite song or death in a volcano but you get your favorite snack
Hank: song space. both because I think space death would be less painful and probably faster weirdly enough. You float on lava which is not a good vibe . You got to remember this is liquid rocks and they have the , it has the density of rocks, so you're just like on there like a hamburger on the grill, eating eating Cool Ranch Doritos. I'd rather have all the air sucked out of my lungs and not be able to breathe back in, and that does also sound very bad, but bad in a different way. Music also though, I'd prefer music to snack in a death scenario. 
Tyler: okay
Hank: I just  think music is so good.
Tyler: I don't know how you would listen to the music...
Hank :your earbuds would pop right out, is what would happen, any air trapped in your inner ear would expand and pop the earbuds out, but
Tyler: well that's all I have you,
Hank: they want to see your hat
Tyler: my hat! oh I got the coolest hat in town, check this out. I had this hat made by an artist, they go by the felt forge on Instagram and I commissioned this really cool wizard , crystal wizard hat
Hank: it's very good, crystal wizard hat
Tyler: yeah it's my favorite thing is the world
Hank: it's very, it's perfect for a live stream, very perfect
Tyler: thank you hank
Hank: yeah!
Tyler: bye guys
Hank: bye Tyler


[Cut]

Hank but hes being Jarrod: what a great conversation with Hank Green and Tyler Thrasher. I'm Jarrod and I would have answered some of those questions differently for example I would desperately like to be dry. John I'll see you on Tuesday.

Normal Hank:
That thing is not fun to take off. Where are my glasses. People of Denver, and Colorado Springs, and Boulder Colorado I'm going to be at Comedy Work South on March 18th doing my show, if you want to come see it.