Good morning, John, it's Hank. My FireWire port on my camera broke so there is no way to get the footage from inside of my camera into the inside of my computer, so instead I've made my entire video today with my still camera. Hopefully, Canon will honor the warranty on my beautiful, wonderful, but non-functioning HD30. If they don't, I'm gonna pull out some whoop-ass!

So I hope that you all enjoy this song. This also, unfortunately, means that there will be no Truth or Fail this week. I'm sorry about that. It's sitting on the inside of my camcorder. What am I supposed to do with it, there?

[Song: Mules Are So Half-Ass by Hank Green]

The mink lost her furry scarf,
She said it was stole, and
The shoe salesman wanted to help,
'cause he had so much sole

But then his whole left side fell off,
but he's all right now, and
The pregnant heifer saw it happen, yeah,
she had a cow, and

The CO₂ delivery guy always gives me gas
And I really hate mules because they're so half-ass,
Yeah I really hate mules because they're so half-ass.

The bike can't sand up by itself,
It says it's two-tired, and
The human cannonball was late for work
and he got fired

And if your pants are too big
You'll get exposed in the end
And if you crash your fancy car you'll see how
A Mercedes bends, and

The CO₂ delivery guy always gives me gas
And I really hate mules because they're so half-ass,
Yeah I really hate mules because they're so half-ass.

I forgot how to throw a boomerang,
But then it came back to me
It's like riding a bike,
or playing with your Wii, and

If you don't pay your exorcist,
you'll get repossessed, and
The pirate shot himself
So he could have that dead man's chest, and

The CO₂ delivery guy always gives me gas
And I really hate mules because they're so half-ass,
Yeah I really hate mules because they're so half-ass.
Yeah I really hate mules because they're so half-ass.
Yeah I really hate mules because they're so half-ass.

[Back to talking]
Now I'm gonna show you some footage from my live show in Cambridge, Massachusetts, which was an absolutely amazing show, and we at DFTBA Records have decided to make that show available as a live album for a mere ten dollars! You can get it right now at DFTBA.com. It's- it's still on pre-order, but they'll be shipping out tomorrow.

I wanted to do it for the people who've been to Nerdfighter gatherings and wanna relive the awesome that is the gathering and also for the people who haven't been able to come to Nerdfighter gatherings so that you can have a little slice of that life because we could never go to all the places where all Nerdfighters are because I think that there are some on Jupiter and inter-planetary travel is a little dangerous, these days, so I- I don't think we're gonna make it out there.

OK, that is all for now. You can get my live album. It is called "I'm So Bad At This: Live" at DFTBA.com.

[At the live show]
Everything in this song is an acronym for DFTBA. Uh, every- every line. It goes like this. It's a- it's a rap song, so if you weren't at LeakyCon, you've never heard it in an acoustic version.

[Song: DFTBA by Hank Green]

Don't Forget That Brains Attract
Darling, Fetch That Battle Axe
Decepticons Fear This Brilliant Autobot
Do Fish Take Baths A (lot)?

Dogs Frequently Take Back Apologies
Dreadful Feudal Treachery Breeds Atrocities
Darkened Forests Take Bravery Away
DFTB, DFTB, DFTBA

I don't know what you mean when you say,
Please explain, what is DFTB- I don't... [fade out]