Good morning Hank, it's Tuesday. Evil Baby Lady Bath-ory. Today's video is like the ancient Egyptian concept of the soul: it comes to you in 5 parts.

Part 1: The candle. So Hank, this is my first novel, Looking for Alaska, and as you can see, here on the cover there is a tiny candle that has apparently been extinguished, leading to an improbable amount of smoke. The original cover design of Looking for Alaska had no such candle, it was just the smoke, but then certain book store chains were like, "That looks like cigarette smoke." And then Penguin was like, "Yeah, that's 'cause it is cigarette smoke." And they were like, "Well we can't feature a book with cigarette smoke on the cover!", and that's why there was always a candle on the cover of Looking for Alaska, until now!

This fancy new hardcover of Looking for Alaska with no candle is part of the amazing box set that Karen Kavett designed. Which also has hardcovers of the new Paper Towns design and Nerdfighter Sarah Turbin's amazing Katherines design. Hank, to be honest with you I always sort of hated the candle so this is, like, incredibly good news for me because I've spent the last 7 and a half years looking at this book and thinking, "Yeah, I'm proud of you, but I hate the candle!"

Part 2: TFIOS covers. Hank, The Fault in Our Stars is now out in many other languages including Bulgarian, Danish, German, Dutch, Spanish, Catalan, European Portuguese, Brazilian Portuguese, Hebrew, and most importantly, Swedish! Hank, I realize this'll probably be an unpopular opinion, but I freaking love the cover of the book I know as The Fault in Our Stars and the Swedes will know as Förr Eller Senare Exploderar Jag! And yes, I know that's improper pronunciation. I don't speak Swedish. To quote the great Peter Van Houten, "Who the hell speaks Swedish?" Hank, I love this cover because it's the cover Augustus Waters would want: it's bold and weird and pulpy and all about love and death and grenades and sacrifice, it's just awesome! But Hank, regardless of whether you like it, you have to admit that there's been tremendous change in the field of my foreign language covers, because none of those covers featured feet or whispering girls. I mean look at my other books: feet, feet, feet, whispering girl, feet, feet, whispering girl, feet, feet, feet, whispering doll girl, you freak me out.

Part 3: Kiva. Hank, as you know, you and I both have outstanding punishments, but we haven't actually done our punishments because, you know, punishments suck. However, I am willing to make you a deal, Nerdfighteria. If the Nerdfighter Kiva group gets to $1 million before Hank and I get to 1,000 videos, you can challenge both of us, we will do those challenges, and then the slate will be cleared. And then we'll be rid of this whole failure to do the punishment thing, which I feel like has been a real roadblock in our relationship. For those who don't know, Kiva is an amazing website that allows regular people like you and me to make loans to entrepreneurs in the developing world. It's really really cool, and if you get to $1 million before we get to 1,000 videos, then you get to challenge us. However, we might try to avoid punishment by making videos more often than usual. B-b-b-b-b-but, if you don't get to $1 million before we get to 1,000 videos, then the punishment slate is wiped clean, we don't ever have to do those punishments. Why is that the rule? Because I am the older brother and I make the rules to all the games.

Part 4: Homework. Nerdfighters, finish Fahrenheit 451 by next Tuesday.

And part 5: Thank you. Nerdfighters, thank you for submitting so many pictures of yourselves; Hank, thank you for turning those pictures into me, and also Bald John Green, the mustachioed protagonist of the Swindon Town Swoodilypoopers. By the way, big game's coming up for the Swoodilypoopers; in fact, I need to go play. I will see you on Friday!

And they were like, "Well we can't feature a book with..." (John looks back because Evil Baby Lady Bath-ory cutout falls) Evil Baby Lady Bath-ory.