Good morning, John; it doesn't matter what day it is, 'cause you're not going to see this for a while because you're on a boat in the middle of the ocean in Europe or something and I'm totally confused; I never really know what you're doing anymore.

Just because there's no Internet on the boat doesn't mean you can't vlog! Okay, yes, it does. Anyway, this video comes in five parts.

Part One: My new glasses. If you look really close and in the right light, they're green! Mm-hmm.

I'm very happy with them, so thank you very much to the Nerdfighters and all of YouTube for helping me choose these wonderful new glasses; they were very cheap... the way I did it. Second: I am proud to announce the winner of the "Going Postal" Nerdfighting Blurbing Book Club... it was Emily: "Went postal. Would go again," which I completely agree with.

So Emily, I hope you will enjoy your prize which is... Number Three: The Nonexistent Nerdfighting Prize of the Day. The Nonexistent Nerdfighter Prize of the Day is something that I've been doing in my head for a while.

Sometimes I put it in the comments and sometimes I just think about it. Here's how this began: It turns out John and I aren't actually very good at actually giving rewards to the people who deserve rewards, like the people who've won the Blurbing Book Club in the past haven't actually received anything in the way of rewards. We're bad at it; we're really bad at it; embarrassingly bad at it, even.

So the Nonexistent Nerdfighting Prize of the Day is given to a nerdfighter as a badge of honor. You deserve something! We just happen to be too lame to actually get it to you.

So the Nonexistent Nerdfighting Prize of the Day has a few advantages over actual prizes. First, you can show it off to everyone, anyone, everyone in the world, not just people who happen to be nearby you. You get it immediately.

As soon you deserve it, it's there; you've got it! Also, there's no shipping at all, so it doesn't produce any carbon dioxide on transport. And you're never sure who's gonna get it, you're never sure.

It could be someone with an exceptionally good comment. It could be the winner of the Nerdfighting Blurbing Book Club. It could be the person who designs the best graphic for the Nonexistent Nerdfighting Prize of the Day.

In fact, if I get a really good awards graphic for the Nonexistent Nerdfighting Prize of the Day in my inbox at sparksflyup at gmail.com, I will definitely give that person the Nonexistent Nerdfighting Prize of the Day. Fourth: I've heard from four of the five people who bought my album at the Rock Ridge's Terminus show. If you're the fifth person, please email me.

This is something that I will actually send. And I have no idea what number I'm on... this is why I don't do "parts" videos: A secret project. Now, intelligent and diligent nerdfighters will probably know what this is about, but whether or not you do, I'm absolutely positive that you want to be involved.

It's very exciting. You have an opportunity to do something pretty amazing. But we're gonna need a lot of nerdfighter help to do it.

If you go to nerdfighters.com right now, or click the link in the sidebar, you'll find a signup. It's the same list as the Secret Project for Awesome list, so if you did that and your email address hasn't changed since, then you don't have to worry about it. But everybody else, if you want to be involved in the project, you do have to do that.

Because that's the only way we're gonna be talking about this stuff, okay? And lastly... Did I say this was five parts?

This is more than five parts. I don't know what's going on. We are closing submissions for the Nerdfighting T-Shirt Design contest, and I'm about to show you, in rapid motion, [singsong] all of the exciting T-shirts from nerdfighters; you can vote on them at nerdfighters.com.

Lots of good things from people like SharkeyeJones, and lots of things from people that I didn't even know. [normal voice] I really love some of these. There are lots that I couldn't even fit in the video. So I'm very excited to find out which of these shirts we will be printing.

We may take the top three, we may take the top four; I'm not sure. But some of these shirts will be available on the Great American Tour de Nerdfighting. Nerdfighters!

You can go to nerdfighters.com right now and vote on which is your favorite shirt, or if you're at nerdfighters.com right now, you can look right above this video and there will be images of all the shirts and a little script that will let you vote on your favorite. John, I'm pretty sure I'm gonna get my next video up before you get your "Catcher in the Rye" video up. And if I'm wrong about that, then I'll see you then, but if I'm right, then I'll see me first. [blows raspberry] Oh my God, I forgot a thing.

Last thing, for real this time: John started a new scavenger hunt and this time it's European! The first clue was in Sweden, it's been found, and it's been deciphered. So far, we have the letter B.

We don't know what the letter B means, and I don't know what the letter B means either. I'm looking forward to finding out. Scavenger hunt!

Wheeeeeoooooo!