Jane: Oh. Hi! It's so good to see you. Not that I can actually see you or anything, since I'm on the internet and you're sitting at home. Can you imagine if I could actually see you? That would be weird.

Lizzie: Uh, hi, everyone. Uh, don't worry, I'm still vlogging, and we will get back to the promised Darcy-bashing. But today I have a very special guest, my big sister and second-bestest friend ever, Jane!

Jane: Second-bestest?

Lizzie: Oh, just be glad you aren't Lydia. She doesn't even rank.

Jane: Okay...

Lizzie: Great! My name is Lizzie Bennet, and this is where Jane chimes in.

[Intro plays]

Lizzie: I've asked Jane here today because I've been getting some comments--Yay comments! Keep them coming!--that imply I might be a tad bit biased in my portrayals of friends and family members. Of course I'm biased! It's my video blog! However, in the interest of fairness, I have asked my sister Jane here, the nicest person I know, to come and give her opinions. Ready, Jane?

Jane: Ready.

Lizzie: Okay. Let's start with Mom. My take: we love her, but she's nuts. Jane?

Jane: Kind of. But sweet.

Lizzie: How about Dad?

Jane: He is pretty low-key. And he does enjoy winding up mom, but in a sweet way.

Lizzie: Now, Charlotte, Lydia, and you have all been on the video blogs, so people can come to their own conclusions. How about the illustrious... Bing Lee?

Jane: Well... you know I like him.

Lizzie: Once I got to know him, I liked him, too. Although not in that way. Because that would be weird.

Jane: So we're three for three?

Lizzie: How about Darcy? And I defy you to call him sweet.

Jane: I'll admit, he's a little prickly. But he's, he's... wwh... he's so... ah, he's, hm...

Jane: No. No, no, no. I was just talking to Lydia about this...

Jane: Gosh. It's going to come to me any second now...

Jane: Yeah, I can't think with the camera looking at me like that...

Jane: He's tall! Darcy is tall.

Lizzie: Okay! For the record, when the nicest thing Jane Bennet has to say about you is "tall," you have personality problems.

Jane: Lizzie.

Lizzie: What? It's totally true.

Jane: What did you think about Caroline?

Lizzie: Bing's sister?

Jane: Isn't she super sweet?

Lizzie: [forced] Yeah! She's great. [normal] Okay! There you have it! Jane agrees! Lizzie Bennet is a news source you can rely on. Thanks, Jane!

Jane: Bye, everybody.

Lizzie: Bye!

[Jane exits]

Lizzie: Jane can be right about Caroline. I guess. I mean, she was really nice to everyone. But she kept going off in a corner to hang out with Darcy. Like Statler and Waldorf being snarky for their own amusement. Which is not something I do. Not that I could hear them or anything. Maybe she's just into him. Lord knows why.

Caroline was sweet to Jane, though. I'm sure she really likes her. Or she knows she should be nice to her because Bing likes her. Wow. I am really suspicious of people. Okay! I am going to be positive. Positive.

Oh! If Bing's sister was only being nice to Jane because Bing likes her, then she's smart because I'm pretty sure it's true. And I know it's driving Charlotte nuts, but I still think Jane is doing the right thing by playing it cool. I mean, Jane and Bing have hung out what, like four times? How do you base a long-term relationship on that? So Jane, if you're watching this, and I know you are, don't listen to Charlotte!

[giant red X and text reading "LISTEN TO CHARLOTTE!" appears]

And that's it for today's video. Don't forget to watch next time. It should be exciting. Bing and Caroline are coming to dinner, and fortunately, Darcy "has plans." So it shouldn't be too painful. I hope.

[Outro plays]