Katherine: Hello and welcome back to Hank and Katherine Play LEGO Harry Potter Years 1-4 this is...this is the infirmary or something.

Hank: Did you just call me Kank?

K: Kank. Maybe a little bit.

H: Kank and Hatherine.

K: Kank and....

H: Where is the...oh there's a student in peril up there, hello!

K: Kank and Hatherine.

H: Hello! Hello! Hello, I'm...

K: Um. Still, still exploring in this area.

H: Yes there's so many things.

K: Boing! Boing! Boing! Boing!

H: I lifted this person up. You got it! Oh you needed to bounce.

K: It wasn't a student in peril it was the Dobby.

H: You needed a bounce. I am lifting this boy up. Not sure if that is doing us any good though. Where is the crab?

K: Where is the crab?

H: Come to me, crab.

K: Maybe it's...maybe it's not in this room.

H: Maybe. We did open that other room up.

K: Yeah.

H: We're so close to true wizard, oh my god!

K: Harry's like, you guys, my elbow!

H: My arm is a jelly man. I am made of jelly. Okay let's go...let's go and see if the crab...

K: Wait!

H: Wait...

K: Come on!

H: Nope. Okay.

K: Wait...ahhhh!

H: We obviously have to go back there.

K: You are such a...

H: There we go, true wizard. Hermione, I need a book smarts. Flask, stars, moon, hat. What do we get. Do we get it? Where's the thing. Show me it.

K: I just got it!

H: Oh you did? I'm not paying attention.

K: It was...it was in the, amazingly enough, spiderweb. On the wall.

H: Oh, it was a spider. Oh, wheelchair.

K: Uh...okay.

H: I am Hermione Hawking.

K: What is this? What is this?

H: Self propelled. I feel like Doctor X in this thing. I don't know. It needs a key? I think it needs a key. Looks like it needs a key.

K: Oh.

H: You wanna go back and heal Harry now?

K: The key didn't come out of...awwwwww.

H: I'm sorry!

K: You ran over her! Wait a minute.

H: Ooh I can do a wheelie!

K: Woo!

H: Weee!

K: Oh! 

H: What a giant, beautiful flower. Hey you shot me.

K: I was trying to shoot the flower because that's what I do.

H: It's what you do. Ring that bell! 

K: No, it doesn't really do anything. You can do it over and over again.

H: (Singing) Ring the bell! Ring my bell!

K: Okay. Mmm.

H: I didn't know...I didn't think it was a spider. I thought it was a lobster.

K: No, it's a spider. This one is a spider, the other one was cherries.

H: Skele-Gro sounds disgusting.

K: This is a different potion then the one we were making before.

H: Right. Yes, no wonder it tastes so bad, 'cause it's got a spider in it.

K: Ah! That sounded bad.

H: Wait, he just got better? I thought it takes a long time.

K: Yeah.

H: Yeah! Now you jumpin' on the bed! You got your Quidditch pads on. Yeah we're very...very impressed.

K: Oh no Colin!

H: Oh no!!

K: Colin no!

H: It's so lucky that they all saw the monster through something...

K: Let's go to the dueling club!

H: Yeah, dueling club!

K: Let's duel some...some junk!

H: It's so long since I've read this one. (Sings along with music)

K: That's so many. Aw, dissapointment. 

H: You know you can't do everything every time.

K: You can't do everything every time. What was that?

H: You can't do everything every time.

K: You sound kind of...

H: It's an aphorism.

K: Okay. I was wondering about the accent. It was weird.

H: My spastic. Spaccent.

K: Spa...spazzent.

H: Oh do you have an itchy face, Lemon?

K: Gooey gooey gum pot!

H: Gooey gooey gum pots.

K: Spinny gooey gum pots.

H: Oh, spinny gooey gum pots. I see.

K: What else are we gonna say? You're just talkin' to the dog!

H: I'm ta...well the dog is cute and she deserves attention!

K: But they can't hear...see her.

H: Why is this knight submerged in the water?

K: Good question.

H: Why are you bouncing around?

K: Why do I always have that spell on?

H: Pixie, Pixie, Pixie, Pixie. There's nothing to do here, we've done everything in this room.

K: That guy is hanging from the ceiling.

H: We've done everything that we can do in this room. Do you agree with me?

K: Hm. I don't know. I suppose. My leg is asleep!

H: Wake it up!

K: Ow. 

H: The alarm clock is going off, leg.

K: Oh god, ow. Ow, leg. Ow. Why. Why? Pinsy pinsy needles needles.

H: Pinsys needles.

K: Pinsys pinsys pansies needles.

H: Okay, where are we going?

K: Gimme gimme gimme gimme.

H: (Singing) Life is a highway, I wanna ride it all night long!

K: Gimme, gimme gimme gimme gimme gimme gimme. Hey look! Look! (Grunts).

H: Yeah! What happened?

K: I just zapped 'em. Instead of actually using the right spell. 

H: Who am I? I'm Hermione.

K: Some days...

H: Some days....

K: I just don't push the right button.

H: What did you make? Oh.

K: I made a cauldron for Polyjuice potion that we cannot use yet. Yay.

H: That we can't use yet.

K: No, it's all incremental. Incremental.

H: Incremental.

K: You gotta do...ahh. Okay.

H: You see me doing it!

K: I know...no I don't! I'm not...uh...un...unbelievable as it may seem I am not paying attention to you twenty four hours of the day.

H: I'm Hermione. She knows what's best.

K: Well. That's your opinion.

H: Especially when it comes to collecting...so you don't get true wizards for like...the...parts where you're just walking around?

K: Mhm.

H: You just get the bolts.

K: OHHHHHH! I fell off.

H: Yes you did.

K: (Laughs) Oh, I see. I see what you're saying

H: Yeah. So this isn't like...we're not in a level right now, we're just walking around.

K: Okay. I see, I see what you're saying.

H: So walking around...

K: But we get other stuff like...

H: Yeah, but like, we can get that stuff anytime. 

K: I guess.

H: And it'll all be much easier to get when we have the abilities to get them.

K: All of the things...all of the...

H: We don't have to be like, I wonder if we can actually do this.

K: All of the capabilities. Yeah, alright. Alright. 

H: Are you...you guys still think he's dreamy?

K: Seriously.

H: Yes, I agree with you, Snape. What is that? Nice.

K: They're dueling mannequins.

Both: (Imitate Ron and Harry laughing).

K: Expelliarmus! What?

H:  Are we gonna learn Expelliarmus?

K: I don't know. Isn't that the point of this?

H: Yes, we seem to have it available.

K: Great. Use it! I'm gonna be back here. Shootin' shit.

H: I'm gonna be makin' sure these guy's don't...

K: I mean...you know, stuff...Oh, I guess I do have to get...I have to get some too.

H: I don't know what we're doing.

K: Your score won't count if you go past the red line.

H: Ohhh....I just thought we had to prevent them from coming past the red line. I made it...Harry is the winner!

K: Yeah, Harry is obviously the winner, Ron has not even tried yet. What, um, what spell are we using, here?

H: Expelliarmus, the red one.

K: Oh. Okay.

H: That did not work on you, interestingly. Umm...are we done? Oh you have to do it too.

K: Yeah. Stop running around like a...

H: I'm gonna be shootin' stuff.

K: Wee.

H: Those are crooked check marks you're makin'. Boom.

K: Speak for yourself man. 

H: What, your check marks are crooked! I'm just sayin'!

K: Your check marks are crooked!

H: Oooooh!

K: Get him, Snapers.

H: (Whispering like he's speaking Parseltongue).

K: Why?

H: Speaking in Parseltongue.

K: Why?

H: I don't know! Because I think Harry is about to speak Parseltongue and it's gonna...be a thing.

K: It is gonna be a thing.

H: It's gonna be like, Heir of Slytherin, Heir of Slytherin, oh my god!

K: Here. Here, Snape. Hold my very expensive broom that I'm carrying around for no reason. 

H: Oh frickety frackety.

K: Why? Yeah, exactly. Why would not my...

H: Oh, come on!

K: I'm...hm.

H: I'm doing very poorly.

K: Me too, he is...he keeps dodging.

H: Yes. I have noticed the dodging.

K: Awww I fell into a lot of little LEGO pieces.

H: Shoot! Shoot balls! Get him, get him, get him!

K: YEGO! I just said YEGO pieces.

H: YEGO. No! Oh, I dodged. I dodged. He dodged, I dodged. Why? Shoot at him you perv! Perv? No, you were pointed the wrong direction! Oh, yes. Right.

K: It doesn't work though, it's so freaking annoying! Ugh! Okay, this sucks and I abandon ship.

H: No, you just have to keep going. I think it only matters what I do. Not that I...you know...

K: Yeah but it's still annoying for me. Eh!

H: Can I get any closer? What? That one landed right on his head!

K: Ugh. Oh, dodged.

H: I do not understand. I am pointed at him, frickety frack, yes!

K: Weeee! We did it!

H: Expelliarmus, oh my god.

K: That was patheticus.

H: What did that go over?

K: Um...

H: It like, replaced a spell.

K: Um, Incarcerous. That one that we bought.

H: The one that we bought.

K: But...yeah, that's where it goes.

H: I don't need Incarcerous.

K: No, because Incarcerous doesn't do anything...

Both: Ahhhhhh!

K: I'm so mad, I made a snake!

H: Don't talky talky.

K: (Whispers like Parseltongue).

H: What was that?

K: What?

H: Ooooh.

K: Yeah!

H: I...go get him. That seems like complicated magic to like, make a snake out of nowhere. 

K: Yeah, totally. That doesn't seem like something that Malfoy should be able to do at this point in his magic career.

H: (Singing) Why is there a question mark and a blowy face man?

K: She's wondering who the Heir of Slytherin is.

H: Oh.

K: Parseltongue unlocked, Harry!

H: Yeah! Now I can get past snakes. (Makes sound effects) One thousand bolts! You cannot do anything in here.

K: One thousand studs.

H: Bolts! Why did...I swear I'm not makin' that up.

K: Studs.

H: Yeah, clean up that picture of that thing.

K: Sometimes we have to do things, so we can get to the next area. Or a new area.

H: Hello, hello! I'm waving at you. You're saying no. I'm not a Hufflepuff.

K: Because you are not a Hufflepuff. Okay, I see. Okay. That's good to know! Good to know.

H: I need to be a Hufflepuff boy. Collecting the ghosty bolts! Ghosty bolts!

K: (High voice) Lemon, gimme the ghosty bolts!

H: (High voice) Gimme the ghosty bolts.

K: (High voice) Lemon! Can...can we have

H: (High voice) Can we have the ghosty bolts?

K: (High voice) Can we have the ghosty bolts? She's not even reacting at all! She's not looking at anything.

H: (High voice) She's sleeping at my feet.

K: (High voice) She's kind of opening her eyes a little bit but that's about it.

H: (High voice) Lemon, the ghosty bolts.

K: (Laughs) Sounds like that creepy guy from Family Guy.

H: I know, it does.

K: Who always wants to touch Chris

H: (High voice) Hey, Chris, you want a lollipop?

K: (High voice) I've got...got some popsicles in my deep freeze!

H: (Laughs) Oh, just having a deep freeze is creepy. That's just like...

K: (High voice) It's in the basement. (Laughs)

H: All of our friends have a deep freeze. In Montana. They keep their deer parts in it.

K: Yeah, well, you know. Sometimes you got deer parts.

H: Yeah. Sometimes you got deer parts and sometimes you got, uh...parts of small children.

K: What just jumped off the edge there? Ahh! What is jumping?

H: I don't know, I can go check.

Both: (Laugh)

H: Ahh!

K: Fabulous. This thing is...

H: What are you...
 
K: I don't know it is...

H: It's just very productive of the 

K: Yes, very productive, it had lots of options in it. Do doo doo doo!

H: Do do doo doo dooo! Singin a song about the knights!

K: (Singing) I built a thing. It doo dee doo.

Both: (Singing)

H: (Singing) I built a knight made of gold

K: (Singing)

H: (Singing) I can't destroy him until I do it.

K: Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!

H: (Singing) What is going on, I did not go that way.

K: I don't know. I...ahhh!

H: Ahhhh! I can speak Parseltongue.

K: You can speak Parseltongue, yay!! It's the most exciting thing that's ever happened!

H: Hi! Does...is this what I got?

K: (Meows?) What am I doin' with it?

H: I would like to change the view so that we can see better, what's going on.

K: What is it? Okay, it's a thing. And this part...it's a snake. We have to build it. From the bottom up.

H: We have to build him! I should probably get my...

K: Yeah you should probably maybe, maybe help. Or try. Yeah put that on there. Put that on there.

H: On where?

K: Right there on the purple thing, underneath the Slytherin banner. Right, see where I'm holding mine?

H: I see where I'm holding yours. I don't...

K: Oh. Oh I thought I had that one. Okay, sorry. Um...it's so hard to tell.

H: That's the bottom.

K: Yeah, that's the bottom, right? Don't you think?

H: Sure, that looks like the bottom.

K: And put that one on top of that. Put this one...

H: Click! And, snake head!

K: Get! Get i! Get it. What? What the eff?

Both: Whoaaaa!!!

K: I jumped off the edge! Get out of the way, stupid Slytherin!

H: What...why did it vanish?

Both: Uhhhhhhhh.......

K: Nooo!

H: Nooo! Stop vanishing you asshole!

K: Oh.

H: We've discovered a glitch.

K: Oopsie.

H: It glitched.

K: Oopsie poopsie whoopsie whoopsie whoopsie whoopsie whoopsie whoopsie whoopsie whoopsie doodles.

H: There maybe I knocked it down now. You gotta...there we go, there we go! Here we go again, girls, what's my weakness?

K: Men! Okay, meh, eh, eh

H: Okay then, chillin'.

Both: (Mumble) Villain.

Both: (Mumble)

H: (Laughs)

K: (Laughs) I'm makin' it sounds good and it works!

H: (Mocking Katherine) It woooorks.

K: Gettin' 'er done. (Mumbles more).

H: And I couldn't believe this...why is...we are in the same place but it's like, super dark.

K: No we're not in the same place we just went down to the Slytherin...

H: This is new?

K: Common room.

H: Ohhh Slytherin Common room. Are we gonna learn how to use Polyjuice Potion?

K: Ugh.

H: I have to open this door! I feel that we are way long. 

K: Well why don't we stop, then?

H: 'Cause we're in the middle of a cutscene.

K: Well why didn't we stop before that?

H: I don't know! I just realized!

K: You are the one that is supposed to be keeping track of that, I don't know what I'm doing. I can only push the buttons. I cannot be in control of this.

H: Ooh! Yes, Slytherins opened it! We have to learn how to use Polyjuice Potion.

K: Let's go home.

H: Heh! (Sings).

K: Alright.

H: Okay.

K: This has gotta be the end of this one.

H: This has gotta be the end of this one.

K: Thanks for watching Hank and Katherine Play LEGO Harry Potter Years 1-4. You will not see us and we will not see you but you will hear us next time. Goodbye!

H: Goodbye.